Superpowered Mind with Clare Dimond

I have a question about subliminals. Is there a right or wrong time for this? I started listening to your work half a year ago and it was so scary and over my head that I stopped. Then I came back later and now there seems to be less inner resistance or protection.Can it be too soon? I am endlessly curious but how do I know that I am ready for it?  Also, if I spend this money on subliminals (I am a social worker and a single mother, so it’s quite an amount for me) am I really sure that I want nothing in return? Don’t I instantly want a change while knowing this attitude send me to hell and prison the last months? The subliminals would be some kind of blind trust which really feels right. Can you help me find out if it’s right for me?

What worries me the most that there is no relief or release. I stay in the stress, tension. Even with good, pleasant things, situations, or situations that go well. I go back to stress, hate etc. It's like I can't allow good things or happiness anymore. 

hi Clare I am divorced from my wife and we don’t have children. She has remarried. My mum is in her 90s and i said I will go to see her for Christmas Day but the whole thing is just making me feel so lonely. I have people I speak to in work but we don’t have the sort of relationship to meet up afterwards. I did have old friends from college but they are all quite far away and busy with their own things.  I would like to have a partner and I’ve tried to meet someone but nothing seems to work. Each year I just feel more and more alone. I know someone might say loneliness is just my thinking but it doesn’t feel like it. 

I listened to your podcast and read your book and of course you scare the hell out of me. Thank you for that.I will try to put my question into words, English is not my first language and I am also not familiar with the words you use. However I try to ask a question about how we create our world.I used to date a lot. After being in a very long relationship I threw myself out there. It was awesome, exciting and devastating. For one and a half years I experienced a range of emotions in a seemingly meaningful, certainly hurtful way. I was like on autopilot, repetitive behavior, the same story over and over again. My mind created heartbreak and drama for 18 Months. The protagonists changed continuously, so it wasn’t about any of them. Then it stopped.Now I see what it was there for. How it helped me to understand what my mind is capable of. All the drama that makes me feel so free and alive is quite the opposite. But kind of amazing to. When I was fully in it, the (Tinder-)Algorithm presented guys on a regular basis. Handsome, smart, funny. To that time I felt like all those amazing men came into my life. Now it feels like I fabricated the entire thing. It appears to have come directly from my imagination. Like I was thinking of a lack of tenderness and there comes heartbroken a guy, talking about how sensitive and tender he is. I felt like I needed security, the came along a crav maga instructor. I sensed a feeling of lack or need and it was fulfilled for a second until it wasn’t. Like my sense of what I need was precisely attacked.The cycle was like this: Sense of lack- search - match - wonderful feelings – disappointment - Sense of lack- search - match - wonderful feelings – disappointment Like gradual deconstruction. That was the word what came to mind over and over again, deconstruction. And the more I see that, the less I can reconstruct the old building. As if I not able to produce that. I cant make it up. Its emptyI recently realized how I have this kind of magical thinking a lot... It is clear what kind of dream theater happened there. In this case, the appearance or absence of men is probably just a psychological processBut then my mind turns it around  like: So when I get the “right” attitude then I can change the outside world. There is this one side which is so clearly made up. And then there is the other where it is so clear that whatever I think or say will not change what is about to happen. Can you see what is confusing me? How can there be such a clear manifestation of the felt sense of lack AND at the same time it feels so cocky to think I can control the outside world by doing/feeling/seeing something the “right” way.It isn’t easy to put this into words. I hope this makes any sense to you at all. I guess, I am looking for magic.

My husband's job is to teach people to live in the now. He has helped hundreds of ordinary people that have been referred by mental health charities and the NHS etc. Some of these people get better after a lifetime of anxiety. He takes them straight to the experience of their true nature and they get it! He lives in the now too and doesn't worry about anything. Ever. You could say he is free. We often have discussions on the topic of the self. His 'argument 'is that if the self is illusory and has no free will /personal agency then who is it that is helping these people get better and how come these separate selves are improving?  He feels that this is not random ie. it's just what's happening - and finds the approach that some non-duality teachers ( Jim et al) take would not help these people out of their suffering in the same way that Mike's approach seems to.These teachers sometimes say "there is nothing you can do '' to help anyone. It's just what it is and yet 5 people have been guided to their true nature and awareness in the last week! Mike knows that he is following his internal guidance system at an individuated level of the all that is, but this doesn't seem random to him. This question is a bit unwieldy. Do you see where he is coming from?

I noticed when i hear something in the media about  a certain movement i want to speak up to my family.A couples years ago i left a community  i was in since birth. I couldnt handle the rules all based (to my opinion) on fear, guild, and sin.From that moment on my family socialy declared me death. My siblings no longer talked to me according to the rules of the community.Sometimes i really want to speak up to them and let them know how it hurts they never contacted me again. I had some hope they come around. Becauce i never changed on a deep level. I "only" have different thoughts about life works.But i know it will make no difference. In there eyes iam the lost one. The lost sheep.I am sometimes stuggeling with it. I think it is acknowledgement i want from them. Being heard. Loved instead of feared. But they believe  they will be punised by God if they are socially interacting with me.Maybe it's a mirror? Can i acknowledge it hurts me (or this mind body system) from time to time. Can i allow i choose a different pad in life and don't need permission from them to feel okay, whole.It must be a mirror! But its SEEMS they are the problem. Out there!  This community! But i also see the flux in it becauce there are periods i don't even think about them or any of it.  

'What is the ego and what am I if not that?'

I'm in knots trying to work out what to cook for dinner. I just can't find anything suitable. Suddenly I am full of self pity because it always seems to be me who has to solve this VAST problem.  I can't do it! Then I just give up and experience peace. Time passes...and then it transpires that everyone is actually out this evening and its just me I have to cook for, so I'm off the hook. I have used this as an example of my inner wisdom, but I am not sure anymore. It is like there is two forms of wisdom...wisdom that wants to keep the identity safe and make it feel good, and wisdom that just unfolds like life itself.**Here is the question**: is the pulling back from the stressful experience of having to choose A og B a form of false wisdom? I often experience a pulling back, because I know my thinking will change. But, what I have learned on this course is that going up to edge of the unpleasant feeling, to look for the ME who is experiencing this,  is a way to transcend a small program within the larger program (like transcending one record in a record shop that exist to play records). Is pulling back a way that ensures that the record will play again and again, until I see that it has nothing to do with who I really am?

What I'm noticing is that I often begrudge other people's successes. I have judgemental and contemptuous thoughts and fear of other people's work being better than mine.  I can see there is a desire to be special. Even being in  this conversation brings out these feelings of superiority. This feels jarring because the thing I want to do (or at least what my mind is telling me I want to do) is to support people and lift them up. I get that these are just thoughts. I don't choose them and I am able to act from a place of support regardless.  It's horrible though. I can see that the other constructed version of myself as 'nice' and supportive is fighting against this shadow side with all of these resentments and meanness. I know the whole point is that we let everything in. I know that real freedom is allowing all of this. I do wish it would go away though so I could enjoy being 'nice me' properly!! I guess I need to fully allow this to teach me what there is to see? Whenever I hear people like yourself I can't help but think, I bet she doesn't think these nasty things like me!     

In a recent podcast you encouraged us to gravitate toward our discomfort, get curious about it rather than flee from it. I tend to be a conflict avoider, spending energy protecting the non-existent “me.” For example, I avoid my husband when his weather is stormy. Although there are swells and troughs, his baseline aggravation is high. Even as I write this, I am trying to be aware of my own projections around it. His irritation is often directed at our children, and when I don’t join him in his gripes, he feels betrayed and unsupported. If I enjoy time with them that is light and unencumbered, he seems resentful or jealous. When I try to soften toward him, he hardens. I see we are both stuck in a story of “This is not how things should be.” He wants our family to be more in line with his expectations. I want him to love us and himself for who we are. Yet do I love him for who he is? I do love his essence, the loving person I sometimes glimpse behind the armor, but I don’t love the aggravation and accusation. Over the years I have become braver about trying to communicate with him. These attempts usually result in him getting defensive and me feeling sad and resigned. I have felt his verbal bullets pass through me like air, no “me” to trap them anymore. I don’t feel my happiness relies on his, but I am so sad that we can’t seem to share happiness together. Where are my blind spots here?