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How to break out of autopilot and create the life you want | Graham Weaver (Stanford GSB professor, founder of Alpine Investors)

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Jan 16, 2025

Guest

Graham Weaver

Graham Weaver, a Stanford GSB professor and founder of Alpine Investors, shares his journey of helping students uncover their true paths. He discusses the importance of breaking free from autopilot living and embracing intentional decision-making. Listeners learn about the 'genie methodology' for identifying passions and the transformative 'Nine Lives' exercise for exploring different life possibilities. Graham also highlights the power of overcoming limiting beliefs and the role of resilience in personal growth, offering a fresh perspective on achieving fulfillment in one's career.

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Episode notes

Time and Suffering

Success takes time and suffering; choose a path worth enduring hardships for.
Long-term commitment, not overnight wins, determines ultimate success.

Accountability

Create accountability for pursuing your goals through executive coaching or a trusted friend.
Talking about your aspirations activates more of your brain than just thinking or writing.

Daily Goal Setting

Write down your goals daily, along with three actions to achieve them.
This aligns your subconscious mind with your aspirations, leading to increased productivity.

Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode

Breaking Free from Autopilot: A Guide to Finding Life's Purpose

01:35 • 5min

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Pursuing Your Genie Goals

06:29 • 6min

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Breaking Free from Autopilot

12:38 • 3min

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Pursuing Passion Over Fear

15:58 • 18min

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Fostering Resilience in Parenting and Personal Success

33:45 • 3min

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The Power of Accountability and Self-Discovery

36:41 • 21min

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Lessons from Failure and Personal Growth

57:22 • 15min

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How to Change Things When Change Is Hard

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In 'Switch', Chip and Dan Heath explore why making lasting changes is difficult due to the conflict between the rational mind and the emotional mind. They present a framework for successful change by uniting these two minds, drawing on decades of research in psychology, sociology, and other fields. The book provides compelling examples of how everyday people have achieved dramatic results by following this pattern, whether in personal, organizational, or societal contexts.

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In 'The Untethered Soul', Michael A. Singer explores the nature of the self and how to achieve spiritual growth by recognizing and releasing the inner blockages that prevent us from experiencing true happiness. The book emphasizes the importance of accepting reality as it is, rather than trying to control or resist it. Singer provides practical advice on how to manage negative thoughts, cultivate a positive mindset, and live in harmony with the natural flow of life.

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How to Win Friends and Influence People

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First published in 1936, 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' by Dale Carnegie is a timeless guide to improving interpersonal skills. The book is divided into four main sections: Six Ways to Make People Like You, Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking, and Nine Ways to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment. Carnegie's principles emphasize the importance of genuine interest in others, active listening, and avoiding criticism and argument. The book offers practical advice on how to build strong relationships, communicate effectively, and influence others by aligning their self-interest with yours. It has been a cornerstone of personal development and business success for generations.

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Where the Crawdads Sing

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The novel tells the story of Kya Clark, a young girl abandoned by her family in the marshes of North Carolina. Kya learns to survive and thrive in the natural world, forming deep connections with the creatures of the marsh. The story intertwines Kya's coming-of-age with a murder mystery involving Chase Andrews, a local celebrity whose body is found near the marsh. The novel explores themes of isolation, love, survival, and the profound impact of the natural world on human life. Delia Owens' vivid descriptions and atmospheric narrative bring the marshland and its inhabitants to life, making this a compelling and emotionally deep read.

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Don't Believe Everything You Think

Why Your Thinking Is the Beginning & End of Suffering

Joseph Nguyen

This book by Joseph Nguyen explores the root cause of all psychological and emotional suffering and offers a new paradigm for understanding the human experience. It provides tools and insights to help readers become unaffected by negative thoughts and feelings, experience unconditional love and joy, and break free from self-destructive habits. The book emphasizes that suffering is optional and that an expansion of consciousness is necessary to solve problems that cannot be addressed with the same level of consciousness that created them. It includes new chapters, journaling prompts, and contemplative exercises in the expanded edition.

Graham Weaver teaches a top-rated course at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business (GSB), where he often unexpectedly ends up helping students figure out what to do with their lives. He is also the founder and CEO of Alpine Investors, a people-driven private equity firm. In our conversation, we discuss:

• Why everything worthwhile requires suffering

• Why most people operate on autopilot, and how to break free

• The “genie methodology” for discovering your true path

• The Nine Lives exercise for exploring different life possibilities

• How to overcome limiting beliefs that hold you back

• Why “not now” is often just another way of saying “never”

• More

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Find the transcript at: https://www.lennysnewsletter.com/p/how-to-break-out-of-autopilot-graham-weaver

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Where to find Graham Weaver:

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/graham-weaver-2b79

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/grahamcweaver

• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@grahamcweaver

• Website: https://www.grahamweaver.com

• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@grahamcweaver

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Where to find Lenny:

• Newsletter: https://www.lennysnewsletter.com

• X: https://twitter.com/lennysan

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lennyrachitsky/

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In this episode, we cover:

(00:00) Graham’s background

(05:30) Helping students find their true path

(07:40) The genie methodology

(12:36) Breaking free from autopilot mode

(17:54) Identifying and overcoming limiting beliefs

(20:33) Teaching entrepreneurship and personal fulfillment

(22:53) The reality of long-term success

(35:14) The role of accountability and executive coaching

(40:22) Daily goal setting for success

(43:11) The Nine Lives framework

(48:01) The dangers of the “not now” mentality

(55:27) Navigating life’s transitions

(57:19) Failure corner

(01:00:24) When to quit and when to persevere

(01:02:18) Final thoughts and lightning round

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Referenced:

• Setting Goals: Demystified: https://www.grahamweaver.com/blog/goals

• Tony Robbins’s website: https://www.tonyrobbins.com

• Alpine Investors: https://alpineinvestors.com

• Stanford GSB Last Lecture 2024—How to Live Your Life at Full Power: https://www.grahamweaver.com/blog/stanford-graduate-business-school-last-lecture-2024

• I turned 50 today. Here is the most important thing I learned in my first half century: https://www.grahamweaver.com/blog/turning-50

• Where the Crawdads Sing on Prime Video: https://www.amazon.com/Where-Crawdads-Sing-Daisy-Edgar-Jones/dp/B0B5KBKDNL

• Chilipad Cube Bed Cooling System: https://www.amazon.com/Chilipad-Cube-Bed-Cooling-System/dp/B07GT9MYRW

• Sleepme OOLER Sleep System: https://www.amazon.com/OOLER-Sleep-System-Temperature-Integration/dp/B07RX8LT9G

• Eightsleep: https://www.eightsleep.com

• Howard Thurman’s quote: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/6273-don-t-ask-what-the-world-needs-ask-what-makes-you

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Recommended books:

• Switch: How to Change Things when Change Is Hard: https://www.amazon.com/Switch-Change-Things-When-Hard/dp/0385528752

• The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself: https://www.amazon.com/Untethered-Soul-Journey-Beyond-Yourself/dp/1572245379

• Don’t Believe Everything You Think: Why Your Thinking Is the Beginning and End of Suffering: https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Believe-Everything-Think-Expanded/dp/B0D47VYQMY

• How to Win Friends and Influence People: https://www.amazon.com/How-Win-Friends-Influence-People/dp/0671027034

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Production and marketing by https://penname.co/. For inquiries about sponsoring the podcast, email podcast@lennyrachitsky.com.

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Lenny may be an investor in the companies discussed.

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