Real Recovery Talk

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Allie Severino, host of the "Dope Sick Nation", which premiered on VICE in 2019. Allie's goal is to help educate and heal America with her series offering a unique, inside perspective on the addiction problems facing our country in addition to the addiction treatment industry. Allie is passionate about educating families on the advancement of addiction treatment, harm reduction, and holistic approaches. She believes in education to aid prevention and advance the recovery of people with substance abuse. Allie's goal is to help families and loved ones affected by addiction. Allie's Addiction History After getting arrested at 17 for drug use and receiving probation, Allie admitted herself into recovery. She earned her GED and started working full-time, obtaining her real estate license in the process. Allie wasn't enjoying real estate as she had hoped, so she started her own Fresh Start magazine. She wrote and published under a fictitious name, not wanting anyone to know who published this magazine. Pitching "Dope Sick Nation" To get "Dope Sick Nation" picked up by a production company, Allie and her friends had to go in and pitch it more than once. The first time, they hated it; the second time, they loved the idea. She talks about how several of her friends died during the filming of the series. "There was a lot of emotional stuff going on while we were filming." While there were definitely positive memories, such as Shane, who is still in recovery doing well, much of it was very intense. Alex's Story of Addiction, Relapses and Recovery Starting treatment in Florida last year, he heard of "Dope Sick Nation" being filmed. In 2020, he had relapsed very severely and was drinking heavily daily. Since he was looking for treatment in Florida, he decided to reach out to Allie to be in the series. Listen in and find out what you can expect from watching "Dope Sick Nation", and how Alex decided to stay in recovery instead of going home to Arizona. Check out our new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [03:15] Allie gives us a bit of her history from addict to recovery. [07:11] How Allie's friend decided to create a movie on patient brokering. [10:21] From the movie American Relapse to getting syndicated as a TV series. [16:50] Ben and Allie discuss drug addiction recovery options. [19:18] Allie's experience with couples recovery. [22:35] What you can expect when you watch "Dope Sick Nation". [25:45] Alex tells us his story of addiction, relapse and recovery. [30:10] Allie's visit with Alex in recovery. [33:37] How we incorporate physical fitness at Rock Recovery Center. [40:39] Alex's plans for the near future. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions Visit Allie Severino on the web Check out American Relapse

Today, Ben and I are chatting to Jacob, who tells us his story of relapse, which led him to his deterioration and how he dug himself back out to sobriety again. Being introduced to alcohol at age 8, Jacob had a long and challenging life ahead of himself, which has led to his recovery with support from Rock Recovery Center. Starting His Life of Alcohol and Drugs at Age Eight At 26, Jacob has been living in Florida for over eight years. He was first introduced to alcohol at age 8, where he was given sips of drink at a New Year's Eve party. Jacob liked taking whatever activity he participated into the extreme, and drugs were no exception. He had his first introduction into a drug and alcohol rehab program at the age of 14. Although he was there for a week, he participated but didn't take the program seriously. Jacob Meets Ben at Rock Recovery Center At 18, Jacob came down to Florida to Rock Recovery Center and first met Ben. He didn't like anyone telling him what to do and was always in trouble. When he turned 20, Jacob finally took his recovery seriously and was able to pick up his 90-day celebration chip on his 21st birthday. Taking Recovery to Heart "The steps were easy for me in the beginning, and looking back on it now, I wasn't fully honest through all the steps." At nine months sober, Jacob lost a best friend who was like a little brother to him and promised him that he would throw his heart and soul into recovery. Jacob spent three and a half years sober before he fell into the cycle of drugs again. His relapse started when he stopped connecting with his support group and supporting the recovery community. Jacob began to manipulate the people around him. "The depression, the anxiety, and the anger set in, and it was taking over me." Listen in and find out what Jacob had to do to change his mindset and stay sober after his harrowing experience on and off of drugs. Check out our new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [06:00] Jacob's first experience in a drug rehab program at age 14. [09:15] Promising the soul of his lost best friend that he would put his heart into recovery. [12:42] What his first two years of sobriety looked like for Jacob. [19:05] Jacob's ego got the best of him and started drifting back to drugs. [26:03] Users and recovering addicts should avoid kratom as it binds to your opioid receptors. [32:01] He thought he had arrived when he started drinking himself to a blackout when he felt depressed. [38:08] Why Jacob went back out and did drugs and alcohol. [40:43] Dealing with past trauma and how that affected his addiction. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

Today, Ben and I are chatting about gaining enough positive capital into your life for relapse prevention. Many people get sober, and relapsing can be expected. In this episode, we want to teach you tools and action steps to prevent relapse. Build your emotional capital as a buffer against wanting to go back and becoming an addict again. Becoming Proactive in Your Recovery Process Being proactive in your recovery process is a big part of staying on track in your sobriety. If you do your work on the front end, it's easier to resist those cravings and stay clean when you do have desires. One way to be proactive is to go to meetings regularly - skipping meetings gives cravings a chance to sneak back into your thoughts. Make sure to consistently be doing the work to keep your sobriety. Sobriety Before Relapse Someone sober has made strides and put forth the effort to become sober. A dry person has put down the drugs and alcohol for the time being, but they haven't done the emotional work necessary to fix the addiction's root. It's possible for an individual to go to meetings and be dry because they haven't created the internal rearrangement to become sober. When a person relapses, they have experienced emotional trauma or stress, which has made them crave drugs to feel better again. Rearranging Yourself Internally During our addiction, behaviors ingrained in us are negative, selfish actions used to acquire our drug of choice takes a lot of effort to redirect. You also must build recovery capital by becoming proactive. Gaining capital is a good cushion against relapse because withdrawals happen through negative experiences, and if we overdraw your account, relapse can happen. Check out our new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:26] Relapse prevention is not a black-or-white topic. [07:26] A prerequisite for relapse is for a person to be in active recovery. [09:21] It's possible to go to meetings and be dry because that person hasn't created the internal rearrangement to become sober. [12:50] Start your day ready to add emotional capital to your account. [18:21] The importance of keeping challenges in your life to prevent boredom and relapse. [24:06] Having more responsibility results in more chances for negative circumstances to occur. [32:08] Learning how to be sober and deal with negative emotional feelings on your own is important to preventing relapse. [41:05] Enjoy activities for the activity, not for the past memory of what you did previously. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

Today, I'll be talking about three questions you want to think about and reflect on before deciding to speak with your loved one about becoming clean and sober. No matter if they are a daughter, son, parent, or friend, these are three critical questions that you want to have answered before you start the conversation on recovery. Keep in mind that drugs and alcohol are not the only two forms of addiction. Food, sex, gambling, and shopping are all conduits for addiction. These outlets are no less of an addictive substance than drugs or alcohol as the process ignites the same pleasure systems in the brain. Common Themes Parents Talk About with their Addicted Children While deciding to have a conversation with your child about their drug habit is a good choice, you first want to consider if this is a fear-based or care-centered conversation. Parents who have conversations out of fear speak out of emotion, leading to a charged conversation with negative side effects. Words such as "need to", "should", "do you realize", "how can you", don't belong in a conversation in which your goal is to get your loved one to rehabilitation. What do You Want for Your Son or Daughter? Many parents have a big plan for their children for what they want for their son or daughter based on what they want out of life. We want them to live a happy life with a caring partner, have children, and experience grandchildren for themselves. However, we must pause and reflect on what we are asking of them. Are we basing our children's plans based on what we want for them or what they want out of life? I've experienced parents who have expectations of their children based on what they want for them, not what their children want. For selfish reasons, parents are looking for their kids to live a certain lifestyle because it's easier for the parent, not the child. Evaluate your motives when you are thinking about what your children "should or should not do." Give your kids space to breathe and space to make decisions on their own. Do You Have Realistic Expectations for Sobriety? I can't tell you the number of parents who had no realistic expectations of their children for their recovery. Children are set up for failure when they can't achieve their parent's goals. Understand that when your child enters into sobriety, they are most vulnerable. They must solely focus on themselves to successfully move ahead in the process and become clean again. Check out our new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [05:41] Conversations I have with parents about talking to their children about recovery. [08:41] Negative side effects of having a conversation out of fear. [13:38] Tom recalls the conversation with his dad in which he decided to become clean. [17:37] Make sure your goals for your children are based on what they want and need out of life. [23:50] How children decide who is involved in their recovery process. [27:38] Reasons to reflect on these questions before you talk to your son or daughter. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

Are you considering methadone or suboxone prescription as a way to treat heroin addiction for you or a loved one? Is this a safe way to beat an opioid addiction or will it only make the struggle more difficult? Ben Bueno is a recovering heroin addict shares his experience of being treated with methadone. Resources mentioned in this episode: Facebook Support Group RealRecoveryTalk.com/Facebook

Everyone on the planet is affected by self-esteem in one way or another. Today, Tom discusses how self-esteem in general can influence addiction. In this episode, he talks about what self-esteem is and why positive self-esteem is so important for sobriety and getting and staying sober. He shares his own battle with self-esteem issues and why finding the root cause is so important. He also stresses that it's a process that needs to be facilitated by a good therapist. He talks about action steps that anyone can take to start building up their self-esteem in a positive way. By the end of the show, you'll be able to understand how the health of one's self-esteem can directly impact whether someone will have or develop an addiction problem. Show Notes: [02:03] Just after we did a show on the dangers of Suboxone, we found out that the manufacturers have been ordered to pay a 1.4 billion dollar settlement for negligent marketing. [04:14] Everybody has self-esteem. It can be good or bad, and it's learned over a period of years. [04:51] Traumatic events are a driver of negative self esteem. [05:41] The majority of the way someone feels about themselves will develop during their childhood state. [06:35] If someone has negative self-esteem growing up, the likelihood of them turning to something like addiction is higher. [07:43] One of the first things Tom and his team try to do is help clients identify where their negative self-esteem is coming from. [08:48] Figuring this out comes through therapeutic process. [09:19] If we can figure out what it is that's causing low self-esteem, we are in a position where we can reinforce positive things to build self-esteem back up. [09:26] Once self-esteem is built up, it won't be necessary to act out the way an addicted person did in the past. [11:20] Tom shares his childhood abandonment issues and how when he first began counseling he didn't believe that it was a problem. [12:12] Once Tom realized that he did have abandonment issues, it was a good place for him to start building upon that. [14:05] We want to know what happened prior to your drinking and using drugs that made you turn to them in the first place. One of the biggest reasons for this is one's self-esteem. [14:45] Providing a life that reinforces positive self-esteem will reduce the likelihood of your child turning to drugs and alcohol. [17:19] Once the self-esteem issues are established, it's time to reinforce and build up things that will encourage positive self-esteem. [17:33] People have to have some type of sense of identity and sense of security where they are okay with themselves. [18:00] Community and having friends is a big part of the sobriety process. [19:03] Take the top five people that you surround yourself with the most and you are the average of those five people. [19:39] Having a sense of purpose is a big part of the process. Having something to work towards will keep you going when you are sober. [21:59] It takes internal search to find your purpose. It's also okay to reach out to people and be vulnerable. [22:48] You also have to feel capable and have a sense of self-confidence. [23:19] Tell yourself that today might be hard, but you can get through it. If you don't believe this, you'll never achieve it. [24:22] Make a list of your strengths and things that you have accomplished in the past. [26:04] Eat good food and exercise. What you put in your body will directly impact the way that you feel. [26:57] Have some quiet time and go for walks on your own or listen to a podcast. [27:24] Be clean and take care of yourself and your hygiene. [27:38] Make sure you're home and living area is clean and organized. [28:10] Do things that you enjoy. Try things that you haven't done before to see what you like. [28:35] Doing all of these things will really help to build up your self-esteem. Links and Resources: Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Ep. 75 – Suboxone – Our Opinions – The Pros and Cons

We received two phone calls a couple of days ago that two people we know quite well had overdosed on drugs. One was rushed to the hospital, treated, and released. However, the second person is in ICU and will most likely not make it through his overdose. As a result of these recent tragedies, Ben and I decided to talk about what happens when addicts come to a place where they overdose and signs you can look for to hopefully prevent this from happening to someone you love. Ben Recalls His Early Days of Addiction While addicted, his mom would warn him to make sure that his drug source was "OK" because she was worried that his source could be laced with another drug. His mom was concerned, and now, Ben feels the same. When Ben would doctor shop, he knew his opiates would be regulated through a pharmacy. The "Wash and Rinse Cycle" of Treatment People will go to treatment, get clean time, and then their tolerance to drugs and alcohol drops as they haven't had their drug of choice in their system for some time. At this point, you can get the wrong combination when you buy drugs off the street and you can easily overdose. It's playing Russian roulette if your drug of choice is opiates and you choose to purchase them off the street. The majority of clients coming in for treatment have dabbled in opiates, even if their main drug of choice is alcohol. It's rare to see a client that hasn't tried opiate drugs. The primary drugs we see people recovering from at Rock Recovery Center are heroin and opiates, although many identify as an alcoholic. Relapsing to Drugs Via Alcohol Alcohol is a gateway drug to other harder street drugs. We've seen people start to drink from an office party, then slide back into drug addiction. Whether or not alcohol has been a problem for someone in the past, if you've been an addict to drugs, you also need to stay away from alcohol so as not to relapse back into your old pattern. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [04:41] Differences in drug addicts and alcoholics. [07:19] The dangers of laced drugs in the 21st century. [10:08] What it means to have a case of severe jitters when you're addicted. [14:05] Alcoholics typically die slow, painful deaths. [16:46] Relapsing into drugs starting with alcohol. [18:53] The ease of covering up alcoholism as it is socially accepted and easily available. [22:25] Why alcoholism needs to be recognized as a powerful drug. [26:38] Addiction needs to have more resources to be combated. [30:20] This circumstance has been heartbreaking and we don't want to see another person overdose again. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

Charlie is here today to pick up his two years sobriety medallion at Rock Recovery Center. He is a graduate of our program and has successfully navigated a clean and sober life since leaving Rock Recovery Center. Charlie and his wife chat with us about how Charlie has been living his daily life as a clean and sober society member. The Beginnings of Charlie's Addiction At age 13, Charlie left his home and started drinking socially to the point that he was drinking five gallons of alcohol a week. Before he started drinking heavily, he started taking hard drugs. "Once the drinking took off, my addiction became like a wildfire." His portfolio of drugs included "meth, cocaine, crack, acid, shrooms, and I was in for anything that didn't take a needle." "Balancing" Work-Life and Addiction At 42, Charlie had to make sure he was clean for his job. "I was a Union carpenter, and I worked in a nuclear facility, so my background had to be squeaky clean, so I could pass the Homeland Security background check." He would work 12 hour days, six days a week. After work, he would drink a few shots, go to sleep, then get up and go back to work. His addiction progressed into drinking in the morning to hold him over until break time at work, where he could drink a few shots, then drink again when he drove home from work. Switching from Drugs to Alcohol At first, he was able to "drink like a normal person," and Charlie says that the "alcohol was socially acceptable, so it was easy to get." He felt it was OK to get drunk at home by himself, watching TV, or "playing around in my workshop. I could cut off as many fingers as I wanted to because I was by myself, and it didn't bother anybody." Charlie was a solitary alcoholic and didn't drink around friends or family. Charlie's Wife Amy and Her Perspective on His Addiction "When we first got together, he point-blank told me that he was an alcoholic and he likes to drink." She was OK with that until things progressed and they were in a more serious relationship. He started isolating and not paying attention to her or the children. Charlie decided to go to recovery, came back, and then relapsed soon after. "We live right down the street from a liquor store," so it was easy for Charlie to get a hold of alcohol. They separated, and then Charlie decided to go to Rock Recovery Center for treatment as Amy didn't want to continue the relationship with Charlie's addictive behavior. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [02:24] Charlie talks about his childhood and addiction background. [05:48] He reflects on his history of work and addiction. [09:57] Amy gives her perspective as a wife of an addict. [12:15] Charlie remembers driving drunk with his three-year-old grandson in the car. [14:25] Coming to Florida to Rock Recovery Center was Charlie's first immersive rehabilitation experience. [19:05] What Charlie is doing daily to continue his successful recovery. [19:45] Amy's experience with Charlie's recovery and her wedding proposal to Charlie. [24:28] Living life on life's terms and the importance of reaching out for support. [28:01] Charlie talks about his solid sobriety foundation. [31:36] Why life isn't boring when you're sober. [32:46] Charlie's recommendation on the first steps to sobriety. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

"I feel that if I didn't take that crappy job that I hated, that I wouldn't be here on the path I was meant to be on." -Ben Ben's First Two Years in Recovery Today, Ben and I celebrate Ben's tenth year of sobriety! "Years two through now have flown by for me," says Ben reflecting back on his journey. He remembers his first two years being rough for him as his first two years were a struggle. Ben refers to AA's founder and his recollection of having waves of resentment and self-pity through his process. Why Ben's First Year Was Extraordinarily Hard Ben realizes what made his first year so difficult was that he wanted to go back to his comfortable life. This was when he started taking suggestions and takeaways from meetings and other members of the various groups he belonged to in his recovery. Ben encourages others to take advice and try suggestions from successful sober society members to see what works for their recovery. If something doesn't work, they need to note what didn't work and try a new solution. After two years of sobriety, he created a career change from bartending and personal training to working for a moving company, although he didn't want it as a job choice. He didn't realize that this job would lead him to go to school, getting his degree, and giving him the ability to work with recovering addicts. People realized Ben was owning his own plan and working out of his comfort zone, and they decided to support him. How Trust Makes Sobriety Work When you first come "off the street," you don't trust hardly anyone. However, to have a complete recovery, you'll need to put your trust in a few people to support you in your journey. Ben reminds us that we cannot have a successful recovery without trusting others, giving them a chance to "buy-in" to our recovery, and letting them be a part of our team and lead us to a healthier lifestyle. Listen to Ben's challenges his first two years and how he got through his hardships, how he came to accept "life on life's terms," and how he changed his life's paradigm to create less conflict and justification in his life, which led to his complete recovery. At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being. Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review! Show Notes: [02:36] Ben celebrates ten years of sobriety! [03:37] He reflects on his first two years of being clean and sober. [09:14] Trying new solutions when the previous idea didn't work. [12:33] Do you really need a job that humbles you? [14:37] Getting out of your own way and how that can help you in life. [18:05] Ben's most challenging hardships the first two years of sobriety. [21:13] What prevented Ben from picking up drugs and alcohol during his recovery. [25:41] Playing "Simon Says" to stay sober. [31:07] Confidence in taking action in order to stay clean. [35:17] Life doesn't get easier, you have to get better at handling life situations. [38:20] What he does today to stay sober and how sobriety is possible. Episode Links and Resources Real Recovery Live Chat Real Recovery Talk on the Web Real Recovery Talk on YouTube Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes Rock Recovery Center Real Recovery Talk on Facebook Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

If you or a loved one have tried a 12-Step program like Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous and weren't successful this episode is for you. Find out what works and what doesn't work in the typical 12-step recovery program. Our guest, Ron, will also teach you what it takes to conduct an intervention to get someone you love into treatment for their alcohol or substance abuse issues.