

Mother Mayhem: For Daughters of Narcissistic or Emotionally Limited Mothers
Heather Gray, LICSW
Welcome to Mother Mayhem, the podcast for daughters of narcissistic and emotionally limited mothers. I’m Heather Gray, licensed therapist and narcissistic abuse recovery expert. If you're healing from the mother wound, emotional neglect, or childhood trauma, you’re in the right place.
Start with the first 8 episodes—they lay the foundation for your healing. Learn to understand your experience, set boundaries, and build more honest, grounded relationships. Listener questions are welcome. You’re not alone. Other daughters are here. I am, too.
Start with the first 8 episodes—they lay the foundation for your healing. Learn to understand your experience, set boundaries, and build more honest, grounded relationships. Listener questions are welcome. You’re not alone. Other daughters are here. I am, too.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jan 22, 2025 • 51min
79. Managing the Fear of Setting Boundaries with Your Narcissistic Mother
Setting boundaries with a difficult or emotionally limited mother can be one of the most challenging steps in your healing journey. The fear of pushback, guilt, or rejection often keeps us stuck in unhealthy dynamics.
In this episode, I walk you through:
Why setting boundaries feels so scary
How to recognize the fear and navigate it with more confidence
Practical tips to stand your ground while staying true to yourself
You deserve relationships that respect your needs. Let’s explore how to set boundaries without letting fear hold you back.
Links mentioned in this episode:
*** If you are on the Mayhem Daughters waitlist, check your email for your Founding Member rate**
Didn't get on the list on time but want to join? Here's how:
Mayhem Daughters, our online community it OPEN!
Bring it to Group: Join Tuesday Group
Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Jan 15, 2025 • 21min
78. Introducing Mayhem Daughters- You Belong Here.
Introducing Mayhem Daughters: A Healing Community for Daughters of Narcissistic & Emotionally Limited Mothers
In this episode, I’m excited to introduce Mayhem Daughters, a private, online community designed specifically for daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers. If you’ve felt isolated in your healing journey, this space is built with you in mind.
Mayhem Daughters is more than just another online group. It’s a safe, trauma-informed community where you’ll find connection, support, and the opportunity to heal alongside others who truly understand your experiences. We've created a password-protected space where you can share your story, receive support, and walk alongside other daughters who get it—without the overwhelm of trauma drama.
In this episode, I walk you through:
What Mayhem Daughters is and why it was created.
The structure we’ve put in place to ensure a safe and supportive environment, including spaces like I Want to Be Heard and I Want to Be Helped.
How being a founding member can give you access to special benefits, including a low monthly rate.
Right now, we’re building our group of founding members, and joining the waitlist is the only way to access the special rate of $19.99/month. There’s no commitment required to join the waitlist—it just holds your spot while you decide if this feels like the right place for you.
If you’re ready to take the next step toward healing, connection, and empowerment, join the waitlist today!
Join the Mayhem Daughters Waitlist
Tuesday Group more your thing? It isn't going anywhere. Sign up here.

Jan 8, 2025 • 1h 5min
77. From Trauma to Tenderness: How to Love the People Who Love You
In this episode, we explore how to build the empathy and care skills necessary to love and connect with those who love you—when your past hasn’t shown you how.
Growing up with emotional neglect or narcissistic parents can leave you unsure of how to nurture healthy, meaningful relationships.
Learn how to shift from trauma-driven reactions to tender, loving responses that strengthen your connections.
We’ll cover:
The impact of growing up with emotional neglect on your ability to connect
How to build empathy when you’ve never been taught it
Practical steps to show love and care for others, even if it feels challenging
Join the Waitlist for Mayhem Daughters: An online healing community for daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers.
Bring it To Group. Join Tuesday Group for Daughters: A weekly support group for daughters
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Jan 1, 2025 • 33min
76. Building Better Relationships with Yourself & Others: Healing Through Self-Awareness, Connection, and Community in 2025
As we close out 2024 and welcome in the new year, this episode focuses on building better relationships—with yourself and with others—while embracing healing through community and connection.
Learn practical skills to help you ground yourself, reflect on your relationship goals for 2025, and start nurturing healthier interactions.
Whether you're improving your relationship with yourself, looking to foster deeper connections, or healing from narcissistic abuse, this episode offers valuable tools and insights to guide you into the new year.
Key Topics:
Grounding techniques for emotional regulation
Reflecting on your relationship goals for 2025
Introducing an intentional healing community for daughters beyond social media
Join the Waitlist for Mayhem Daughters: An online healing community for daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers.
Bring it To Group: Join Tuesday group, a weekly peer support group for daughters.
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Dec 25, 2024 • 34min
75. For Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers: On Christmas & After
This morning, as much of the world unwraps gifts and celebrates, I wanted to bring you a special message of love and care. For many daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers, the holidays can be complicated.
Wherever and however you find yourselves today or in the days after, remember you belong here. All of you are in this community of women around the world who are navigating days like this and I, for sure, most definitely am in it with you, too.
Bring it Tuesday Group for weekly encouragement and connection.
Grab your spot on the Mayhem Daughters Community Waitlist
Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things
Wishing you a day filled with self-compassion and peace.
With love,Heather (& Clark!)

Dec 18, 2024 • 29min
74. Letting Go of Your Narcissistic Mother’s Expectations & Claiming Your Own
Today, we’re talking about the impact of growing up with a narcissistic or emotionally limited mother, particularly around the expectations that were set for you — expectations that often left you feeling like you were never enough or constantly falling short.
If you've been holding yourself to standards that don't belong to you, this episode will help you recognize and release those old beliefs. I’ll walk you through how to begin letting go of the pressure of living up to your mother’s expectations and the path to reclaiming your own voice and your own values.
Learn how to recognize when you are still operating under those old standards.
Begin to trust your own needs, desires, and choices — without the weight of "shoulds" or guilt.
Explore actionable steps to let go of perfectionism and reclaim your true self.
Mentioned in This Episode:
Bring it to Group – Join a weekly peer support group for daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers.
Join the waitlist for our Mayhem Online Community.
Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Dec 11, 2024 • 1h 11min
73. Covert Narcissism and Enmeshment: How to Break Free and Claim Your Life
Explore the hidden effects of covert narcissism and enmeshment on self-worth and relationships. Learn how toxic family dynamics can blur boundaries and disconnect you from your true self. Discover practical steps for reclaiming personal identity and setting healthy boundaries. The conversation emphasizes the journey of healing from emotional manipulation and the importance of self-compassion in recovery, empowering listeners to trust themselves again.

Dec 4, 2024 • 1h 5min
72. Healing for Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers & The Supporters Who Love You
This episode is designed for daughters who are healing from narcissistic abuse, and I’m also inviting the loved ones of daughters to listen in, so you can better understand the struggles your loved one is facing and how to offer compassionate, effective support.
In this episode, I’m diving deep into the healing journey for daughters of narcissistic mothers—while also addressing the unique challenges faced by the people who love and support them.
Whether you’re a daughter navigating the complexities of healing or a supporter trying to understand how to show up in a way that truly helps, this episode is for you. I’ll be talking about how loved ones can show up with compassion and empathy, while still taking care of their own emotional needs.
Key topics include:
Understanding narcissistic abuse and its long-lasting effects on daughters
How supporters can offer meaningful support without enabling
Why self-care and boundaries are crucial for both daughters and their supporters
Practical tips for navigating tough conversations between daughters and their supporters
Whether you’re a daughter currently on your healing journey, or a loved one wanting to understand how best to be there for her, this episode offers insights, strategies, and encouragement to help both sides.
Bring it To Group: Tuesday Group for Daughters
Get my Two Cents: Mayhem Consultation
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Nov 27, 2024 • 56min
71. Social Anxiety & Trauma: Finding Your Path to Connection
In today’s episode, we’re diving into the complex link between social anxiety and childhood trauma. If you’ve ever felt that the world of connection feels both deeply desired and overwhelmingly terrifying, you’re not alone. We’re unpacking why social anxiety can often feel like it’s rooted in a personal flaw but is, in reality, a protective response shaped by early experiences.
Consider joining us for Tuesday Group. (YES! YOU! REALLY!)
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things

Nov 20, 2024 • 46min
70. When You're Told You’re Too Much: What to Do When Healing Overwhelms You
Sometimes, in your effort to heal and understand everything that has happened to you, healing takes over, overwhelms, causes you to flood and risks you becoming too much for the people who love you. Healing, well, it’s a lot and we don’t like to talk about this part.
Healing is often portrayed as a smooth journey, but the reality can be quite different. We discuss how intense emotions can surface and how they impact our relationships with others, especially when we feel overwhelmed.
Join us as we explore:
Healing requires patience and self-compassion; it’s okay to take up space in your healing journey.
Open, transparent communication is crucial in maintaining healthy relationships while navigating your healing process.
You don’t have to do it alone. Join Tuesday Group.
Also mentioned: Simple Scripts for Saying Hard Things.


