Make Life Less Difficult

My guest today is Jennifer Adams Murtaugh.Jen and I went to high school together and reconnected a few years ago, both amazed at the crazy, difficult experiences life tossed our way since becoming adults.Today, Jen is happily married to Jonathan and lives in southern California.  But it's been a long and at times extremely difficult journey that has led to this point.Please note, in this conversation we touch on topics of abuse, rape, and sex.  We ask for your to care for yourself first and foremost if these are sensitive subjects for you.  If there are young children present, you may want to listen later or with headphones.www.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Paula Widerlite.  Her story reminds us that we never know what someone has been through on their journey to success.  You can't judge a book by its cover... and you can't know people by their titles. Paula  is the former Chief Strategy Officer of Luminis Health, a $1.2 B not-for-profit integrated health system. Prior to that, she was the Vice President of System Strategy for 22 years at Adventist HealthCare headquartered in Gaithersburg, Maryland. She has led countless strategic planning processes over the course of her 40-year career in non-profit health care in the Washington, DC region. Since July 2021, she has consulted with the National Post-Doctoral Association on its strategic planning process as well as the Universities at Shady Grove. She continues to assist Luminis Health with its strategic planning and business development efforts. Recently, Paula became a certified leadership coach after completing the Georgetown University’s Executive Certificate program. As a trained and skilled coach, she helps her clients address challenges that are barriers to their continued professional growth and development. Combining her skills as an executive and leadership coach and facilitator, she assists executive women who are members of Chief in their career and leadership growth and development. She holds an EQ-i assessment certification, a tool that helps individuals understand their abilities and tendencies that impact workplace effectiveness and performance.  She is a trustee on a local K-12 private school and in that role has been an active participant in the strategic planning process for the educational institution. She has been an active community member serving on multiple boards including Leadership Montgomery, the Lourie Center for Children, the Jewish Social Services Agency, and the Ginger Cover Continuing Care Retirement Community. Currently she is leading the Lourie Center Champions for Children women’s leadership circle. She understands the challenges facing non-profit and membership-based organizations. Some of her recognitions include community service and women in industry.Paula's website: Widerlite CoachingConnect with Paula on LinkedInResources:To Work or Stay Home - How to get it right because there's no do overs by Paula Widerlite (article)Leadership Art by Max Degree (book)The Leadership Challenge by James M. Kouzes & Barry Z. Posner (book)What happened to you by Oprah Winfrey & Bruce Perry (book)Caste by Isabel Wilkerson (book)www.makelifelessdifficult.com Support the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Matthew Gamble.  Matthew is an Inner Alignment Coach.  He holds a doctorate degree in Transformational Leadership and is passionate about helping others find spiritual alignment.Matthew and I met around 2007/2008 when we were both working as pastors.  We pop into each other's lives every few years and it's always fascinating to see how life unfolds for both of us.  In our conversation, Matthew shares pieces of his story into and then out of the traditional religious space.  We talked about the power of curiosity, the expanding use of psychedelics and entheogens in the modern western world, and the continual journey of deepening one's love of self, which leads to a deepening love of others.  Get in touch with Matthew:InstagramLinkedInWebsite: Magnetize GlobalResources:Roland Griffiths: TEDx - Psilocybin and the Experimental Mystical ExperienceJames Fadiman: Author of Your Symphony of SelvesHow to Change Your Mind by Michael PollanFalling Upward by Richard RohrThe Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruizwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Julie Salganik of Avance Global Consulting.  In our conversation Julie shares parts of her story of immigration from the prior Soviet Union to the United States of America when she was four years old.  She shares how that journey shaped her and her work, the generational differences in the immigration experience, and the deep impact of stories -- both the traditional unchanging stories of her family and the changing stories of growth and becoming.  Julie has spent over 20 years advising, equipping, and coaching leaders working with and through others to flourish and deliver exceptional results. She helps clients navigate differences with others and manage change, complexity and uncertainty.  Julie specializes in working across cultures and has worked extensively with leaders in North and South America, Europe, Asia, and the Middle East, across industries, functions, levels of seniority and other divides. While the majority of her clients come from life sciences, high tech, and professional services, she also works extensively with startup and non-profit leaders.  Her work combines facilitation and team effectiveness, leadership coaching, and training and leader development.Facing a big challenge? Looking at a big opportunity? Getting stuck?  Connect with Julie to hear how she can help.  Find Julie on LinkedIn.Send Julie an email: info@avancegc.comResources recommended by Julie:Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: The danger of a single story (TED Talk)Lori Gottlieb: How changing your story can change your life (TED Talk)The Good Immigrant: 26 Writers Reflect on America by Nikesh Shukla (Book)Immigrant Daughter: Stories You Never Told Me by Catherine Kapphahn (Book)Catfish and Mandala: A Two-Wheeled Voyage Through the Landscape and Memory of Vietnam by Andrew X. Pham (Book)www.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Arianne Rice.Arianne is an Episcopal priest, Certified Daring Way Facilitator, and Leadership Coach. She tells me she used to live by the mantra "You are always the problem you are trying to solve." Then she decided she was a person, not a problem. Now she supports herself and others by cultivating and enriching our capacities to "Love who you are and who you are becoming." She does this as the pastoral leader in a worshipping congregation, as a facilitator of The Daring Way™ based on the research of Brené Brown, as a Leadership Coach, and, as a speaker, storyteller, and writer.  You can read and watch her work and connect at ariannerice.comAdditional resources shared from Arianne:The contemporary Christian who supports my faith and spirituality is Richard Rohr, specifically his teachings in the book  "The Universal Christ: Another Name for Every Thing" and the podcast.I am grateful for the work of Maria Popova (brainpicking.org now reborn as The Margilian) She has compiled a seemingly inexhaustible and cross-referenced online library of perennial wisdom that spans disciplines, traditions, and time.The work of Brené Brown is available on many platforms, so the best place to start is at her site - brenebrown.comwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

What comes to mind for you when you hear the word, Conflict?For many, it's things like: avoid, fear, stress, war, anxiety, arguments, etc.  A few think about some positive aspects like resolutions, problem solving, innovation.No matter what your perspective on conflict, this episode can help you use your go-to response effectively plus learn to stretch into new ways of responding to conflicts.Exploring the Thomas-Kilmann Model of Conflict Management, Lisa shares discoveries of her own journey of learning about this framework and the value of applying it in her life.Here are some resources to further explore the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Framework plus other approaches to effectively responding to conflict:Take the Thomas-Kilmann Instrument (TKI) Assessment (Lisa Tilstra/Make Life Less Difficult has no affiliation with this site or the authors of the TKI)Read more about the TKI Framework and see a graphic of the ModelPodcast Artwork by Emma S. Burdock.  Follow Emma on IG: @emmasb_artwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

Today I talk with Anna Sparks about the book, Professional Troublemaker:The Fear-Fighter Manual by Luvvie Ajayi Jones.I love reading and I love discussing the books I'm reading and hearing what others think.  So, when I told Anna about my idea of including conversations about books on my podcast, she volunteered and suggested this book.In addition to discussing Professional Troublemaker, there are a number of other books mentioned.  They're listed here:The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené BrownRadical Candor by Kim ScottClarity and Connection by Yung PuebloThis American Life "Good Guy Discount"More about Luvvie Ajayi Jones:Luvvie's WebsiteFollow Luvvie on InstagramI'm Judging You bookMore about Anna Sparks:LinkedInwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My conversation today is with Kelly Kienzle, the founder of Open Circle Coaching.  Kelly shares pieces of her journey including the loss of her father in the midst of COVID, the deep challenges that exist within long term healthy relationships, and learning to be fully present with herself and be attentive to her own self-care so she can truly be there for others.Kelly  provides leadership coaching and facilitation to individuals and teams to improve organizational performance.  She believes that by strengthening self-awareness and widening perspective, a leader can learn to see scenarios from a new angle that uncovers the possibility for greater productivity, creativity and overall fulfillment.Kelly works with emerging and growing leaders to achieve growth in their professional lives.  She supports their discovery of new mindsets and their experimentation with new behaviors, thus accelerating their career development.  She helps all of her clients build skills in self-identified areas including effective communication, building trust, navigating change, team management, leadership presence and vision-setting.Clients work with her in both one-on-one coaching sessions and highly interactive team workshops.  Her company also designs and delivers leadership development programs for organizations investing in their human capital.Connect with Kelly:Kelly's Website: Open Circle CoachingRead more by Kelly at Open Circle Coaching ViewsReferred to by Kelly:The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruizwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”– Maya Angelou (from Shannon's website)My guest today is Shannon Cochran-Yzquierdo of  Coaching Courage.  Coaching Courage works with leaders, teams, and organizations to reframe the way they see themselves.  Its services include leadership, career, & mentor coaching, strategic communications consulting, facilitation, and motivational speaking.Shannon is passionate about inspiring and motivating leaders to embrace their courage as they transition into their best selves. Her clients build and strengthen their “courage muscle” and find increased awareness around their own behaviors, which supports their journey of transformation into a courageous leader. Shannon’s use of situational role-play and direct communication are her key strengths. She supports and empowers women, minorities, and members of the LGBTQ+ community to strengthen their leadership capacity.  She is a blend of Hispanic and Caucasian heritage, a member of the LGBTQ+ community, and an active volunteer with the St. Baldrick’s Foundation, where she voluntarily shaves her head each year to raise money and awareness for children’s cancer research.Coaching Courage, LLC WebsiteBlog post: The Onion Story Shannon's Personal St. Baldrick's Page.  There is a link to a video about Emily's journey after being diagnosed with a brain tumor. She just graduated from college and is doing fantastic! There are also some photos from different events at the bottom of the page and children who Shannon shaved in honor and in memory of. Listen to Shannon as a guest on the Transformational Leadership for Transformational Times Podcast Courageous Leadership in Action : No One Said It Would Be Easy, a dynamic workshop conducted by Shannon and co-instructor, Jessica Robledo.Resources:The Trevor Project: 24/7/365 support in the USTrevor Space: International Digital Support Community for LGBTQ+ young peopleBefrienders Worldwide: Find a helpline by CountryParents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays: PFLAG.orgSuicide Hotlines by CountryIt Gets Better Project:  The It Gets Better Project inspires people across the globe to share their stories and remind the next generation of LGBTQ+ youth that hope is out there, and it will get better.Human Rights Campaign Sage USA: Advocacy for LGBT Elders Matthew Shepard FoundationOut & Equal Workplace Advocateswww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra

My guest today is Darcie Milazzo, Founder of the Penn Cannon Group, an Executive Coach, and an Agent of Transformation.Darcie Milazzo is dedicated to developing leaders with a commitment to make a positive difference in the world.  As a coach, consultant and higher education executive, she supports higher education institutions, its innovators and creatives in the successful pursuit of game-changing initiatives.Darcie has served as the Associate Dean for Strategic Initiatives at Georgetown University, a  co-creator of the Institute for Transformational Leadership at Georgetown University and served as one of its first co-directors.  At The Ohio State University, Milazzo was principal investigator for $4.75 million in annual grant funding. Milazzo began her career in Washington, DC, gaining professional experience in corporate training, product development, and best practices research at The Corporate Executive Board.  Darcie earned a Master’s degree in higher education administration from the University of Michigan and a bachelor of science in organizational communication from Ohio University. She holds executive certificates in Organization Development and Leadership Coaching from Georgetown University. She is a member of the International Coach Federation. She is also certified to administer and interpret Myers Briggs Type Indicator. She is a board member for the Georgetown Institute for Transformational Leadership Network. Darcie currently leads the Penn Cannon Group, a global leadership development consultancy based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.Since 2013, Darcie, her husband Matthew and two sons have lived in the north hills of Pittsburgh. On Pittsburgh, she shares "It's a city we truly love, with a community we admire and a place we can contribute. We are home." Penn Cannon has a dual meaning. First, it is derived from her sons' middle names, inspiring its work on behalf of future generations. And second, the names themselves come from two of the places that hold deep personal meaning for her; Pennsylvania and Cannon Beach, Oregon.   Website: Penn Cannon GroupEmail: darcie@penncannon.comBooks we discussed:The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der KolkWhat Happened to You? by Oprah Winfrey and Bruce PerryHealing Collective Trauma by Thomas Hübl and Julie Jordan AvrittRising Strong by Brené Brownwww.makelifelessdifficult.comSupport the showMake Life Less Difficult~   Support:buymeacoffee.com/lisatilstra