Negotiate Anything Forget Tactics — Rapport Gets the Deal Done
Mar 29, 2026
Hamilton, a negotiation expert and executive educator, and Daniela De Gregorio, an Italian family-law attorney and trained mediator, explore rapport as the core of influence. They discuss using empathy and strategic questions to de-escalate, methods for preparing mentally and practically, balancing warmth with firmness, and when to posture or hold information to protect leverage.
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Hostage Negotiation Training That Taught Rapport
- Daniela described her realistic hostage negotiation training with Italian military forces where emotions run extremely high.
- She emphasized starting by treating hostage-takers as people, asking their name, and quickly establishing rapport to de-escalate the situation.
Use Simple Questions To Calm High Emotion
- Ask simple, reasoned questions to move someone from emotional reactivity to analytical thinking.
- Use prompts like What do you want? How do you see the situation? and What is holding you back? to surface interests and calm escalation.
Conflict Means There's A Relationship To Repair
- Daniela reframes conflict as evidence of a relationship that can be repaired and an opportunity to grow.
- Visualizing conflict as a dance helps parties explore new communication steps and long-term satisfying solutions.