Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast Repair Without Over-Explaining
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Feb 25, 2026 They unpack why people with ADHD over-apologize and how rejection sensitivity fuels that pattern. They explain why pre-apologizing can shift emotional labor onto others. They contrast one-way apologies with two-party repair and outline practical steps: acknowledge, repair, reset. They discuss boundaries around responsibility, managing shame, and offer ready-to-use repair scripts.
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RSD Drives Over Apologizing
- Over-apologizing in ADHD often comes from rejection sensitive dysphoria, a hyper-reactive fear of criticism that pushes people to apologize preemptively.
- Nikki explains this turns guilt into someone else's emotional labor by seeking reassurance from the listener.
Pre-Apologies Undermine Credibility
- Pre-apologizing undermines your credibility by signaling low confidence before you speak.
- Pete notes a pre-apology makes the listener question the statement instead of hearing it plainly, weakening your message.
Use Acknowledge Repair Reset
- Use repair not just apology: acknowledge impact, take responsibility, and propose concrete steps to prevent recurrence.
- Nikki models saying I'm sorry, validating the person's experience, then offering specific scaffolding like timers or preparation changes.