
The Bossticks Valerie Bertinelli On Overcoming Trauma, Letting Go Of Shame, & How To Practice Self-Love
Mar 19, 2026
Valerie Bertinelli, Golden Globe–winning actress and bestselling author, on her journey of reinvention and healing. She opens up about confronting childhood trauma, writing a vulnerable new book, and doing the quiet work of self-acceptance. Conversations touch on forgiveness, parenting, body acceptance, and how music and family shaped her path.
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Emotions Are Useful Information
- Valerie Bertinelli views emotions as information that guide authentic living and vulnerability.
- She realized during hard times that unprocessed emotional trauma made her tolerate behaviors she previously thought she wouldn’t accept.
Control Your Behavior Not Others
- Do examine what you can control and change your behavior instead of trying to change others.
- Valerie decided after surgeries and emotional strain that she could only control her responses and must stop allowing harmful behaviors into her life.
Seeing Parents As Flawed Humans Heals
- Viewing parents as human helped Valerie forgive imperfections and understand generational trauma.
- After their deaths she researched their lives, concluded they lacked models for healthier behavior, and could see their intentions were good.







