The Foundr Podcast with Nathan Chan 644: This FBI Negotiation Trick Gets People to Say YES (By Saying NO) | Chris Voss
13 snips
Mar 26, 2026 
Chris Voss, former FBI lead international kidnapping negotiator and author of Never Split the Difference, shares high-stakes negotiation tactics. He explains why getting people to say no can be more powerful than yes. Short techniques like mirroring, calibrated questions, tone control, and summarizing perspectives reveal hidden info and shift leverage. Practical, tension-tested moves for deals and difficult conversations.
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Compromise Is A Lose Lose Trap
- Compromise guarantees lose-lose because both sides give up value and ideas get watered down.
- Chris Voss contrasts win-win as a manipulative lure and prefers saying mutual gain to diagnose intent and insist on real benefits.
Questions Can Erode Trust If Handled Poorly
- Asking direct questions can decrease trust because people feel interrogated; subtle techniques gather more.
- Use innocuous skills like mirroring and calibrated phrasing to make others comfortable sharing black swan info.
Chase Manhattan Robber Surrendered Through Tone
- Chris Voss recounts the 1993 Chase Manhattan bank robbery where tone and empathy led a robber to surrender.
- A calming downward tone earned "I trust you," a teammate spotted a desire to exit, and the robber surrendered 90 minutes later.
