Chris Voss spent decades as the FBI's lead international kidnapping negotiator, where a single wrong word could cost someone's life. After talking down armed bank robbers and negotiating with terrorists, he discovered something critical: the rational bargaining models taught in business schools don't just fail—they're dangerous. Compromise is guaranteed lose-lose. Win-win deals are often code for "I'm picking your pocket." And everything you've been taught about getting to yes is actually destroying your leverage and costing you millions without you even realizing it. In this interview, the former FBI negotiator and author of Never Split the Difference breaks down why forcing someone to say "no" is more powerful than chasing a yes, the exact calibrated questions that make aggressive counterparts solve your problems for you, and how to spot the verbal and tonal cues that reveal when someone is lying or hiding critical deal information. What you'll learn in this interview: • Why compromise is guaranteed lose-lose and destroys value in negotiations • How cutthroat negotiators use "win-win" terminology to pick your pocket • Why Chris responds with "mutual gain" instead of accepting win-win framing • The Black Swan skills: tiny tweaks that massively accelerate trust and profitability • How to gather information without making people feel questioned • Why asking questions decreases trust and what to do instead • The power of mirroring: repeating the last 1-3 words to uncover hidden information • How to use calibrated questions to make counterparts solve your problems • Why focusing on terms instead of price creates more profitable deals • The one negotiation habit that compounds over decades: summarizing their perspective • How to get "that's right" confirmations that create instant collaboration • Why understanding their perspective accelerates deals and employee alignment If you're raising capital, hiring executives, negotiating supplier deals, closing enterprise contracts, or navigating any high-stakes conversation, this episode will completely rewire how you communicate under pressure and extract value from every interaction.

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644: This FBI Negotiation Trick Gets People to Say YES (By Saying NO) | Chris Voss

The Foundr Podcast with Nathan Chan

One habit that compounds: summarizing

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