Negotiate Anything The Hidden Power of Listening: How to Spot Lies, Gain Respect, and Control Negotiations
Feb 1, 2026
Kirk Connell, a former hostage negotiator turned corporate trainer, and Dan Oblinger, ex‑police crisis negotiator and author, share battlefield‑tested listening tactics. They break down tactical listening, spotting deception, using silence and tone, preparing with research, and rehearsing pressure scenarios. Short, sharp lessons on how listening uncovers lies, shifts momentum, and preserves long‑term relationships.
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From Hostage Negotiator To Business Coach
- Dan Oblinger described moving from police crisis negotiation to business negotiation and raising five children.
- That background shaped his focus on deception, listening, and emotional control in negotiations.
Let Them Talk 80% Of The Time
- Let the other side speak about 80% of the time and use 20% to reflect and invite more detail.
- Ask open, story-inviting questions to reveal interests and practical plans, not yes/no answers.
Ask How They'll Deliver
- Ask for concrete descriptions of how they'll fulfill commitments to expose weak or fabricated promises.
- Use non-accusatory, open probes to draw deceptive claims into a verifiable story.
