What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

Is it possible to be your full, authentic self as a woman and mother without fear of failure or judgment from others? In her new memoir STASH, Laura Cathcart Robbins discusses her experiences confronting and moving through her own addiction, and how it intersects with her identity as a mother and a woman of color.Laura Cathcart Robbins is also the host of the popular podcast, The Only One In The Room. In this interview, Laura and Margaret discuss: Laura's journey through addiction and treatment while being a mother What it means to live authentically as a mother How our identities inform our choices Here's where you can find Laura: https://theonlyonepod.com IG: @lauracathcartrobbins, @theonlyoneintheroom TikTok: @mscathcartrobbins, @theonlyonepod Buy Laura's book: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668005330 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you lost touch with mom friends since the pandemic? Do you feel that after so much isolation you don't even know how to make friends anymore? In this episode, we talk about how the last few years have changed our friendships, what's gotten harder, and why we're motivated to deepen those relationships again.Amy and Margaret discuss: The "decreased social stamina" many of us feel Why spontaneity seems to have gone out the window How knowing that just about everyone feels this way can really help LINKS: Fresh Take: Mara Glatzel on Being "Needy" Fresh Take: Kat Vellos On Friendship and Connection Vanessa Dueck for Medium: Post-Pandemic Mom Friends Catherine Pearson for HuffPost: Moms Have Held Everything Together This Past Year, Except Their Friendships Morgan Hill for Raising Teens Today: Raising Teens Can Be Lonely Amil Niazi for The Cut: Does Anyone Want to Hear About Burned-Out Moms Anymore? Check out our bookshop: https://bookshop.org/shop/whatfreshhellcast "The Mind" game We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When we have a child who chooses to withdraw and "not talk about it," rather than unpack his disappointment, is that a reason for concern? This week's question comes from our Facebook group:When my seven year old gets upset, he refuses to talk to us even to describe the event that led to his reaction. He seems to prefer to process things internally. And so his immediate reaction is to shut down and say, I don't want to talk.My spouse and I have both made a strong and conscious effort to validate his feelings and to be open and available for the times he does want to talk, but more often than not, my son just prefers to bury the experience and move on without talking about it.Sometimes this means him concluding after one bad experience that an activity is horrible and he will never try it again. Therapy is probably a direction we are heading in. But do you think we should start with the school social worker?Some kids, like some adults, are more emotionally expressive than others. That a 7-year-old processes internally is not necessarily a bad thing. It really depends on the intensity of the precipitating events, their frequency, plus how often you see these reactions from your child. If your kid is spending half his time at home in tears, then you do need to encourage opening up.As parents, the best approach may be to talk, in his presence, about the things that you and your spouse do to move past disappointment and hurt feelings. You don't need to draw a direct line from your own experiences to what you're asking your son to do in order for the point to come across.While frustration tolerance is something you might need to work on with your child, it's probably not something to be deeply concerned about at this stage. Keep an eye on it, push back against it, and over time you will hopefully see some growth in these areas.Special thanks to our sponsor: For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning free diapers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Once we know what anti-fat bias is, it's easy to see it everywhere: in our schools, our doctors' offices, even in our own parenting. Virginia Sole-Smith, author of the new book Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture, explains the perniciousness of anti-fat bias and how we can start to move away from its toxic messages.Virginia Sole-Smith is also the author of The Eating Instinct: Food Culture, Body Image and Guilt in America. Virginia's reporting on diet culture, health and parenting has appeared in the New York Times, Scientific American, and many other publications. Virginia also writes the popular anti-diet newsletter Burnt Toast and hosts the Burnt Toast Podcast.Virginia, Amy, and Margaret discuss: What anti-fat bias really is— and why it's everywhere How anti-fat bias shows up in parenting How we can identify and navigate anti-fat bias as people and as parents Here's where you can find Virginia: virginiasolesmith.substack.com @v_solesmith on Instagram, Twitter and TikTok Burnt Toast Podcast Buy Virginia's book: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781250831217 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We asked our listeners: what would be better if it were just a little bit different? Margaret's ideas include a network consisting solely of TV shows that you only need to pay half attention to.Amy advocates for magical cash dispersal from your phone.In this episode, Amy and Margaret discuss these and our listeners' top ideas, including LEGO vacuums properly-sized ketchup packets hand-dryers that don't hurt your ears Read the entire thread in our Facebook group!We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What do we do when our house is filling up with plastic toys from Happy Meals and goody bags that just make cleanup and attempts at organization SO much worse? Margaret explains how "benevolent dictatorship" helps her navigate this issue at her house.Garbage starts at the door, Margaret explains. She tries to stop things she doesn't want in the house from coming in in the first place and expressing this (gently) to her kids. It's also perfectly okay to throw away these things and NOT involve kids in the decision-making, which only makes for tears. Margaret says that in a whole decade of this approach, her kids have noticed the absence of this "junk" maybe twice.Listen to KC Davis's podcast Struggle CareWe love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do the "momfluencers" who post perfect pictures of their crisply dressed children in lavender fields hold such a sway over us, and what can we do about it? Sara Petersen, author of the new book Momfluenced: Inside the Maddening, Picture-perfect World of Mommy Influencer Culture, gives us a glimpse into what makes mommy influencer culture so seductive.Sara Petersen also writes the newsletter In Pursuit of Clean Countertops, where she explores the cult of ideal motherhood.Amy and Sara discuss: What exactly a momfluencer is How parasocial relationships can backfire on momfluencers The benefits of momfluencers on social media It's natural to want external validation that we're "good" mothers by collecting likes of our carefully staged pictures on social media. In addition to simply logging off Instagram for awhile, it's good to check in with yourself about what you really value as a mom versus what you feel pressured to perform for others, and that could save you a really stressful trip to a blueberry patch.Here's where you can find Sara: Twitter and Instagram: @slouisepetersen In Pursuit of Clean Countertops: https:///sarapetersen.substack.com/about Buy Sara's book: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780807006634 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

50% of preadolescent girls and 30% of boys report disliking their bodies. Those numbers go up in adults— 60% of women and 40% of men report the same dissatisfaction.How do we help our kids when they struggle with their body images—especially when some of those struggles are our own? Especially when unrealistic images of bodies are everywhere on social media? Especially when dieting and weight loss are normalized, along with the assumption that all of us would change something about our appearances if we could?We may not be able to fix the messaging that surrounds us and our kids, but there are ways we can start to subvert it.In this episode Amy and Margaret discuss: why body image issues and eating disorders are related but separate issues how "media internalization" makes things worse why TikTok's "body positivity" movement isn't the perfect answer, either Here are links to some of the writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode: Susan Cowden for VeryWell Mind: "Body Dysmorphic Disorder and Eating Disorders" Lauren Muhlheim for VeryWell Mind: "The Connection Between Body Image and Eating Disorders" Bobbie Eisenstock, Ph.D: "Media and Your Body Image: What You Need to Know" Jean M. Twenge for The Atlantic: "Have Smartphones Destroyed a Generation?" Jill Di Donato for HuffPost: "Gen Z Has A Body Positivity Problem, And It's Lurking On TikTok" Quittkat Hannah, et; al: Body dissatisfaction, importance of appearance, and body appreciation in men and women over the lifespan We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we get kids to view saying "sorry" as more than a get-out-of-jail-free card? This week's question comes from our Facebook page:I have 5-year-old and 2-year-old boys. My question: how do you help kids around 5 years old understand the meaning of "sorry"? My son will do something wrong– and know it’s wrong before he does it– then immediately say he’s sorry. I try to give him a punishment to help him understand what he did was wrong, but he will still do the action again, then say, “Well, I said I was sorry." How do I help him understand the meaning of being sorry so he won’t do the action again?Not all kids are great at apologies. And grownups sometimes go at this the wrong way too, overemphasizing a perfunctory, mumbled "sorry" from the wrongdoer and then moving on. "That's where the conversation ends," says writer Rachael Rifkin in Today's Parents, "with little if any discussion of what happened, why it was hurtful to the person they’re apologizing to, how they can address the hurt they caused, and what they can do to change their behavior."When it comes to apologies, elementary school teacher JoEllen Poon has a great 3-step approach that hits all the key points. Help your child complete these three sentences:1)I’m sorry for...2) This is wrong because...3) In the future I will...A 5-year-old will need some help with this at first, of course. But keep at it and he'll start to really understand what Daniel Tiger said best: saying "sorry" is only the first step.Special thanks to our sponsor: For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning free diapers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we maintain connection with our kids when they're busy slamming doors or talking back to us and we are all sick and tired of each other? Dr. Tish Taylor, author of "Fostering Connection," gives us some tips for diagnosing and troubleshooting problematic elements in our relationships with our kids.Dr. Tish Taylor is a licensed psychologist with a private practice in the greater Kansas City area. She has an established practice specializing in clinical assessment and the mental health treatment of children and teens.Margaret and Dr. Taylor discuss: The difference between disconnection with teens and natural cleaving from us as they age How to start to address disconnection with our kids, and why quantifying interactions works Dr. Taylor's "Who's Showing Up" system Here's where you can find Dr. Taylor: Tish Holub Taylor, Ph.D. on Facebook @TishTaylorPhD on Twitter Buy Dr. Taylor's book We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices