

Gay Men Going Deeper
Michael DiIorio & Matt Landsiedel | Gay Men’s Brotherhood
Gay Men Going Deeper is a podcast about gay relationships, identity, sexuality, and personal growth for gay men navigating modern life.
Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, the show dives into topics like dating, shame, masculinity, confidence, emotional intimacy, and the pressures of modern gay culture.
Expect raw conversations, psychological insight, and the kind of honest discussions that challenge assumptions and invite deeper reflection about what it means to live authentically as a gay man.
Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, the show dives into topics like dating, shame, masculinity, confidence, emotional intimacy, and the pressures of modern gay culture.
Expect raw conversations, psychological insight, and the kind of honest discussions that challenge assumptions and invite deeper reflection about what it means to live authentically as a gay man.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Nov 28, 2024 • 45min
Building Trust in Relationships
On this week’s episode of Gay Men Going Deeper, we're diving into how to build trust in relationships. Many gay men report having trust issues in their relationships due to growing up in a world that felt unsafe and unaccepting of our authentic selves If you struggle with trust issues in your relationships then this episode is a must. Come gain more clarity around any barriers you have to trusting people, as well as what may be required for you to build trust with someone. Also what you can do to start to repair when trust has been broken in a relationship.
Some of the questions we’ll be discussing are:
What is the relationship attachment model?
What is important for you to get to know someone?
What makes it hard for you to build trust in relationships?
What is required for you to build trust with someone?
Have you ever had your trust broken? What did it take for you to rebuild trust?
Come spend an hour with Matt and Michael as they share their raw and real stories of distrust and how they have learned to trust again after betrayal.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Nov 21, 2024 • 51min
Green Flags in Dating
In this episode, we’re shifting the focus from red flags to the positive signs that show up when dating—green flags. Join us as we reveal the positive traits and behaviors that indicate someone would be a compatible long-term partner. We’ll discuss:
What green flags we look for and why they matter
The green flags that we bring to the table
What green flags we see in each other
How to tell if those green flags are genuine or just part of “the honeymoon phase”
Whether you’re new to the dating game or a seasoned pro, this episode is all about finding the good stuff that leads to real, fulfilling connections and healthier relationships.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Nov 14, 2024 • 52min
Red Flags in Dating
In this episode, we’re talking about those warning signs and signals to look out for in potential partners and how to manage these warning signs with care and confidence. We’ll reveal our red flags, both in others and in ourselves, and how we respond to them when they show up in our dating lives.
Some of the topics we cover in this episode are:
Common red flags to look out for and why they matter
Red flags we might bring into dating and how they affect relationships
Strategies for dealing with red flags constructively
Setting boundaries and knowing when to walk away
Balancing awareness with compassion and curiosity in dating
By sharing our own red flags and experiences, this episode equips listeners with practical approaches to navigate red flags, fostering stronger self-awareness, boundaries, and a healthy perspective on dating.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Nov 7, 2024 • 44min
Commitment and Connection in Open Relationships
Dr. Israel Martinez, a licensed clinical social worker and certified sex therapist who works with LGBTQ+, CNM, and kink communities, discusses myths about open relationships. He explores finding your ideal relationship style, the idea of a relationship anchor, and how trust, communication, and boundaries support connection in consensual non-monogamy.

Oct 31, 2024 • 42min
Developing Emotional Resilience
In today’s episode, we’re going deeper into the topic of resilience—what it really means and how we can develop it, especially as gay men and our unique challenges. We’ll explore how the struggles we face, from feeling out of place to dealing with minority stress, can become powerful tools for personal growth. Resilience isn’t just about pushing through; it’s about learning, adapting, and thriving in the face of adversity.
Some of the topics we’re discussing today include:
The difference between dissociating vs. productively handling stress
Surrender vs. persistence: when to let go and when to push forward
Using suffering as a tool for healing and personal transformation
How to reframe challenges as a curriculum for building emotional resilience
Recognizing the fine line between building resilience and burning out
How community and connection can strengthen our ability to bounce back
The importance of self-compassion in the process of resilience
By the end of this episode, you'll have a fresh perspective on how to face your struggles head-on, using them to build a stronger, more resilient version of yourself.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Oct 24, 2024 • 53min
Navigating Depression
In this episode, Matt and Reno come together for their first duo episode to talk about their experiences with depression. They share openly about what causes depression in their lives and what they have done to deal with it. If you are someone who struggles with depression, we want you to know you are not alone. It is so important to normalize conversations about aspects of mental health that are still stigmatized. We hope this episode leaves you feeling seen, and offers you some ways to support yourself, and also ways to feel supported by others as you navigate your own depression.
The questions we explore in this episode are:
What is depression?
What is your relationship to depression?
How have you dealt with your depression?
What advice do you have for someone who is dealing with depression?
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Oct 17, 2024 • 45min
I Don’t Belong in the Gay Community
Have you ever felt like you just don’t belong in the gay community? In today’s episode, we’re tackling the deep and painful feeling of not fitting in—a sentiment shared by many gay men. Some of the topics we’re exploring today are:
How do we feel excluded vs. how do we feel included?
Belonging vs. fitting in
Vulnerability
Judging others and ourselves
Core wounding and attachment trauma
Fear of rejection
Fostering more inclusive spaces
If you’ve ever felt like an outsider or if you want to help create a more inclusive gay community, this episode is for you. Let’s learn how to cultivate belonging, both for ourselves and those around us.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Oct 10, 2024 • 32min
I Wish I Wasn’t Gay
In honour of National Coming Out Day, we’re diving deep into a sentiment many gay men have struggled with at some point: "I wish I wasn’t gay." While this feeling may seem contradictory on a day meant to celebrate coming out, it’s a reality for many who grapple with their sexual orientation and the journey to self-acceptance.
In this episode, we unpack the challenges of embracing your authentic self, including:
How we came to accept our sexuality
Would we change our sexuality if we could?
Words of encouragement for those who wish they were something different than they are
Whether you’re on your own journey of self-discovery or supporting someone who is, this episode is filled with heart, vulnerability, and hope. Please do share this episode with someone who needs to hear it to foster more understanding, compassion, and support on this National Coming Out Day.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Oct 3, 2024 • 1h 2min
Mindset Work VS. Body Work
In this episode, we welcome Somatic Intimacy Coach, Vance Hedman, for an insightful discussion on the importance of both mindset work and somatic body work when dealing with emotional pain and discomfort. We delve into how each approach can be uniquely beneficial in different scenarios, particularly when it comes to intimacy, building friendships, and deepening relationships. Some of the concepts we cover today are:
How mindset work and body work are different and how they are similar
How each approach can help you feel better
Dealing with uncomfortable emotions
Finding peace in the discomfort of growth
Getting out of your comfort zone in seeking intimacy
How our emotions can trick us into stagnation
When to listen to fear and when to overcome it
Self-compassion
Choosing the right environment for social situations
Changing yourself for yourself vs. changing yourself for others
Learn how integrating mindset and somatic tools can lead to deeper connections and a more holistic sense of well-being where your mind and body are working in tandem towards your goals.
Today's Guest: Vance Hedman
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Today's Host: Michael Diiorio
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Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

9 snips
Sep 26, 2024 • 43min
Dealing with Your Inner Critic
Explore the complex world of the inner critic, that nagging voice fueling perfectionism and shame. Discover how it tries to protect us while often causing harm. Learn to befriend this critic with self-compassion and transform negative self-talk into constructive feedback. Hear strategies for developing a strong inner advocate to combat self-doubt. Dive into practical tools for managing your inner dialogue and fostering a nurturing relationship with yourself. It's time to quiet that harsh inner judge and embrace a kinder mindset.


