Gay Men Going Deeper

Michael DiIorio & Matt Landsiedel | Gay Men’s Brotherhood
undefined
Nov 13, 2025 • 48min

Nesting: Creating Platonic Spaces for Healing and Authentic Connection in the Gay Community

What we want you to gain from this episode is the importance of non-sexualized, safe, and brave spaces for gay men to heal and grow together. By the end of this episode, you will be able to identify what a nest is, how you could benefit from one, and where to find or create one if you are interested in nesting. The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: What is “nesting” and why is it important for gay men? What moments in our lives require the need for nesting? How do we know when we’re “nested” — or when we’re not? What makes a nest truly safe? How do you tend and protect a nest once it’s formed? What could gay culture look like if nesting became normal? What’s one small way you can begin nesting today? Today's Guest: Nigel Pedlingham Gay Men's Retreat Instagram LinkedIn Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
undefined
Nov 6, 2025 • 45min

How to Open Your Heart to Receive Love

We all say we want love… but are we actually open to receiving it? In this episode, we’re going deeper into what it really means to open your heart. From the subtle subconscious programming that keeps love at arm’s length to the sneaky ways we self-sabotage, we’re unpacking the hidden barriers that make intimacy feel unsafe (even when we crave it most). You’ll learn: Why receiving love can feel harder than giving it How old conditioning teaches us to block love without realizing it The difference between performing for love and allowing it in Practical ways to build safety, self-trust, and openness in all forms of love—romantic, platonic, and self If you find yourself pushing love away, deflecting compliments, or find yourself stuck in patterns that keep intimacy just out of reach—this one’s for you. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
undefined
Oct 30, 2025 • 44min

Falling in Love With The Fantasy

Some of us don’t fall in love with people, we fall in love with an idea of them. The story, the potential, the fantasy of the perfect boyfriend who finally makes everything click. But that idealized version of love often keeps us chasing what looks right instead of what feels real. In this episode, Michael DiIorio and therapist, Michael Pezzullo, explore how fantasy, perfectionism, and external validation shape the way we love- and why chasing the ideal often keeps us from the real thing. We’ll unpack: What it looks like to fall in love with potential - and why we do it  How to tell the difference between healthy excitement and mental storytelling How seeking the “perfect” partner keeps us single or dissatisfied How to stop chasing the ideal and let love be more organic and human Whether letting go of the fantasy means “settling for less” If you’ve ever been in love with potential or the picture-perfect relationship, this conversation will help you come back to reality…where real connection actually happens. Today's Guest: Michael Pezzullo Website Instagram Today's Host: Michael DiIorio Website Instagram Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
undefined
Oct 23, 2025 • 41min

Joy Killers: How and Why We Sabotage Joy

Why does joy feel so hard to hold onto? In this episode of Gay Men Going Deeper, we’re revealing the joy killers: those sneaky ways we sabotage happiness even when life is going well. We explore: The difference between chasing pleasure and cultivating joy Foreboding joy (a.k.a. waiting for the other shoe to drop) and how it robs us of the present. How trauma and disappointment condition us to expect loss  The role of protector parts and self-sabotage in keeping joy at arm’s length. What we’re really trying to protect ourselves from when we don’t let joy all the way in. By the end, you’ll see how internalized shame, fear, and control kill our joy- and how practicing gratitude, presence, and vulnerability can help us reclaim it. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
undefined
Oct 16, 2025 • 29min

Following Your Joy: A Special Solo Episode with Reno

A beachside reflection on living with joy as your compass. He explores where joy shows up in clothing, work, home and relationships. Barriers like shoulds and saying yes when you mean no get called out. Short practices, body-based cues, and small experiments are offered to make joy a daily habit.
undefined
9 snips
Oct 9, 2025 • 47min

How to Find More Joy in Your Life

Discover how joy thrives in everyday moments rather than just milestones. Explore the difference between fleeting pleasure and lasting joy, and learn to identify joy-givers versus joy-suckers in your life. Delight in simple pleasures like nature walks and pets, which teach us presence and forgiveness. Gain insights on practicing joy as a skill and reflecting on what truly nourishes you. Hear about finding joy in midlife, embracing kindness, and giving yourself permission to fully enjoy life, even amidst grief.
undefined
15 snips
Oct 2, 2025 • 1h 6min

Perfectionism, Pressure, and the Gay Overachiever

In this engaging discussion, guest Scott Stirrett, an award-winning LGBTQ changemaker and founder of Venture for Canada, delves into the nuances of perfectionism and overachievement within the gay community. Scott shares insights on how internalized shame drives the need for external validation, recounting his own journey from Goldman Sachs to embracing vulnerability. Together, they explore the difference between healthy ambition and shame-fueled hustle, and the importance of finding intrinsic motivation while accepting failure as part of growth.
undefined
Sep 25, 2025 • 35min

Radical Acceptance: Grief’s Final Lesson

In this final installment of our 4-part series on grief, we explore the powerful practice of Radical Acceptance—what it means, why it’s so difficult, and how it becomes the turning point in your healing journey. Whether you're grieving the person you used to be, mourning a friendship that faded, or facing the slow heartbreak of watching your parents age, grief often leaves us wrestling with reality. Radical acceptance is what allows us to stop fighting what is, and start living again with peace, presence, and purpose. Topics we explore in this episode include: What radical acceptance really means (and why it’s radical) How it differs from giving up, resignation, or bypassing Why acceptance is often the hardest part of grief The role of faith and inner trust when you’re still hurting Personal stories of surrender, softness, and finding peace How to move forward when closure isn’t coming This episode offers a hopeful, grounded perspective for anyone still sitting with loss, longing, or unanswered questions. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
undefined
Sep 18, 2025 • 46min

Aging Parents and Pre-Grief

They talk about the quiet, ongoing grief of watching parents change as they age. They explore role reversals and the mixed feelings that come with becoming a caretaker. They consider how aging triggers fears about mortality and purpose. They discuss ways to preserve memories, invite vulnerability, and strengthen connections while there is still time.
undefined
Sep 11, 2025 • 50min

Grieving Relationships

Not all grief is about death. Sometimes, the hardest losses are the people (or pets) who are still alive—but no longer in our lives. In this episode, we’re talking about the heartbreak of losing relationships: romantic breakups, friendship fallouts, and the deep sadness that comes with saying goodbye to a beloved pet. We explore how grief shows up emotionally, mentally, and even physically—and the unique challenges of letting go of someone who once meant everything to you. Together, we share personal experiences of: The stages of grief  Grieving people who are still alive Letting go of “what could’ve been” Healing after a breakup Losing chosen family or long-time friends Learning how to let go without lingering  This conversation shines a light on the many ways we experience loss and how to move through the grief with compassion, courage, and clarity. Related Episodes: Grieving Your Past When It's Time to Say Goodbye Grappling with Grief: Addison Brasil Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

The AI-powered Podcast Player

Save insights by tapping your headphones, chat with episodes, discover the best highlights - and more!
App store bannerPlay store banner
Get the app