

Gay Men Going Deeper
Michael DiIorio & Matt Landsiedel | Gay Men’s Brotherhood
Gay Men Going Deeper is a podcast about gay relationships, identity, sexuality, and personal growth for gay men navigating modern life.
Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, the show dives into topics like dating, shame, masculinity, confidence, emotional intimacy, and the pressures of modern gay culture.
Expect raw conversations, psychological insight, and the kind of honest discussions that challenge assumptions and invite deeper reflection about what it means to live authentically as a gay man.
Hosted by Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio, the show dives into topics like dating, shame, masculinity, confidence, emotional intimacy, and the pressures of modern gay culture.
Expect raw conversations, psychological insight, and the kind of honest discussions that challenge assumptions and invite deeper reflection about what it means to live authentically as a gay man.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jan 22, 2026 • 49min
Will I Be Single Forever?
Many gay men carry the weight of wondering if they'll be single forever. The hosts dive into the origins of this belief, exploring how shame and fear of intimacy often block love. They discuss the lack of positive role models and how past heartbreaks create a protective mindset that can sabotage future connections. Emphasizing the importance of vulnerability, they advocate for self-compassion and building trust to allow love in. The conversation encourages listeners to challenge limiting narratives and embrace both their single lives and the desire for partnership.

10 snips
Jan 15, 2026 • 54min
How to Build Unshakeable Confidence
Dive into a confidence masterclass that redefines what unshakeable confidence really means. Discover how minority stress and shame can fuel an inner critic, making self-trust feel elusive. The hosts explore the importance of action and discomfort in building resilience. Uncover the truth about 'fake it till you make it' and learn why self-compassion is vital when facing setbacks. With practical advice on dealing with rejection, this episode offers a clear path to transforming shaky confidence into lasting strength.

Jan 8, 2026 • 28min
Standards vs. Boundaries in Dating
They unpack the difference between what you want and what you actually enforce. They explore why attraction can erase boundaries and lead to dating down. They highlight how low boundaries reflect self-worth and fuel the "crumb diet." They outline practical examples of enforceable limits and warning signs of poor boundary habits.

Jan 1, 2026 • 51min
Single and Ready to Mingle
In this episode, Michael and Matt get personal about what we love about being single, how we knew we were ready to start dating again, and what we want to experience differently this time around. We talk about flirting on apps, dating in 2026, and all the messy, exciting parts of putting yourself back out there when you’re ready to mingle.
Some of the topics we cover in this episode are:
• Getting back into the dating world
• When your nervous system tries to hijack your dating life
• Red flags and green flags
• What we’re actually looking for in a man now (and how that has changed)
It’s cheeky, honest, and surprisingly insightful. If you’re single (or single-ish), you’ll feel right at home.
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Dec 25, 2025 • 25min
When Attraction Fades
Explore the shifting nature of attraction in long-term relationships. Discover the four types of intimacy that can replace fading desire. Hear personal stories that illustrate how growth and change can impact attraction over time. Learn practical tips to reignite connection, like trying new experiences and taking intentional space. Understand that sexless marriages can thrive when both partners bond emotionally. Join for an honest conversation on nurturing desire and keeping the spark alive!

Dec 18, 2025 • 41min
What’s Really Sexy (and Nobody Talks About It)
After unpacking our culture’s obsession with “perfect” bodies, this week we’re flipping the script. In this episode, we’re celebrating what’s actually hot: the things that don’t get enough love in the gay world. We’re talking dad bods, wrinkles, kindness, confidence, awkward charm, conversational skills, and all the real stuff that makes someone magnetic.
Some of the things we’re talking about:
How social media perpetuates social norms that don’t fit
The traits we find sexy that don’t get enough love
Stories of when we’ve fallen for people outside our type
The roles of dating apps in attraction and rejection
How our types have changed (and how they haven’t)
This is our love letter to all the guys out there who feel they aren’t sexy because they don’t fit the mold. It’s time to expand our definition of sexy and give some overdue appreciation where it’s due.
Today's Hosts:
Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men
Matt Landsiedel
Reno Johnston
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Dec 11, 2025 • 44min
How to Thrive in the Culture of Body Perfection
From the gym to social media, gay men are constantly surrounded by images of the “ideal” body. But what does all this perfection chasing actually cost us?
In this episode, we explore how body perfection culture impacts gay men on a deeper level: from belonging and self-worth to intimacy and identity.
We open up about our own journeys with body image— how we’ve moved from obsession to acceptance, where it still sneaks in today, and what we’ve learned along the way.
You’ll hear us unpack:
Why body image matters more for gay men
How fitness and self-worth often get mixed up
The difference between caring for your body and obsessing over it
How to stop letting your reflection decide your mood
Practical ways to reclaim confidence and self-respect
If you’ve ever felt like a “perfect” body will earn you love, attention, or belonging, this one’s for you.
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio - Join my weekly newsletter for deeper reflections and practical tools
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Dec 4, 2025 • 29min
Radical Honesty: Letting Yourself Be Known
In this episode, we dive into what radical honesty really means- not the brutally blunt “telling it like it is” version, but the deeper, more vulnerable kind that lets you actually be known.
We explore why being honest is both terrifying and liberating, the subtle ways we still avoid it, and how honesty differs from harsh truth-telling. We share our own struggles with showing up honestly in dating, friendships, and community, and why the outcome isn’t always pretty… but is always worth it.
If honesty is one of your personal values (or you want it to be) this episode will give you plenty to reflect on. And if you’re enjoying these more relaxed, conversational episodes, let us know. We’ve been loving creating them.
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Nov 27, 2025 • 26min
Twinks, Jocks, and Bears, Oh My! The Obsession with Gay Labels
Today we’re diving into one of the most iconic (and hilarious) parts of gay culture: labels.
In this episode, we unpack why gay men are so obsessed with categories like “twink,” “daddy,” “masc,” “otter,” “guy next door,” and every micro-label in between… and how these identities shape the way we date, belong, and see ourselves.
We explore:
Why labels can feel empowering (and sometimes limiting)
How they create tribe, shorthand, and community
When they become boxes we get stuck in
How attraction, identity, and insecurity get wrapped into these roles
What happens when you “grow out” of a label or never fit one at all
It’s a fun, honest look at the ways we use labels to navigate gay life: where they help, where they fall short, and why they matter more than most of us want to admit.
If you enjoy these more conversational episodes, let us know… we’re trying something new.
Today's Hosts:
Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio - Join my weekly newsletter for deeper reflections and practical tools
Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes
- CONNECT WITH US -
Watch podcast episodes on YouTube
Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community
Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls
Follow us on Instagram | TikTok
Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com
- LEARN WITH US -
Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others.
Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame.
Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series.
Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

Nov 20, 2025 • 48min
The Slow Fade: When We Ghost Without Ghosting
They dig into the slow fade: that quiet drifting apart where messages shrink and silence grows. They explore why people avoid hard conversations and what drives both the person pulling away and the one left wondering. They debate who deserves an explanation and when to close the loop. They offer practical alternatives to fading and invite listeners to reflect before they withdraw.


