The Forgotten Podcast

What happens when a child ages out of foster care? In addition to processing the grief of what they’ve lost, children in this circumstance have to navigate the world as an adult sometimes completely on their own. This is the story of my guest today. Jessica Cawthorn and her siblings were cared for by extended family after the death of her parents. But in the 9th Grade, Jessica formally entered foster care and aged out of the foster care system at 18 years old. Today, Jessica works for the Administration of Children and Families and is a Texas CASA Board Member. She is married to her husband, Jonathan, and they have three children together—two through adoption and one by birth. In this conversation, you’ll hear some of the circumstances that led to a failed adoption, how Jessica faced aging out on her own, and practical ways we can support children who are about to age out of care. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jessica-cawthorn-247/

“I may be single and fostering by myself, but I am far from alone.” Community is a crucial aspect of anyone’s journey of becoming a foster parent as you navigate court dates, visitations, doctor’s appointments, school activities, big emotions, and more. When you’re a single foster parent, juggling all of those dynamics can be even more complex. Emma Finton had a passion ever since she was young to become a foster parent, and ultimately became a licensed foster parent in November of 2022. She is currently providing care for two children. On top of that, she enjoys her work as a nanny. In this episode, Emma shares how she knew it was the right time to become a foster parent, the challenges of being a single foster mom, tips she uses to manage the chaos, and the importance of having a supportive community around you. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/emma-finton-246/

At four years old, Sheena Wood was told that she had to make herself “adoptable.” She had medical challenges with her eyesight, feeling lost and alone as she navigated the journey of foster care, moving from foster home to foster home throughout her early childhood. She felt rejected and didn’t know if anyone would want her or if she would be able to find a place to belong. Today, Sheena is a mother of five, married to her college sweetheart, and serves in a church in Florida along with her husband, Josh. In this episode, Sheena shares what it was like to experience foster care, how well-intentioned advice can go wrong, why our words matter as caregivers to children who have experienced trauma, and why “Amazing Grace” helped her feel truly seen. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/sheena-wood-245/

Regardless of our place in the foster care community, understanding who we are, who we belong to, and where our sense of security comes from is vital to our confidence in where we belong. It is such an honor to have Trisha Priebe on the podcast. She’s an adoptee and adoptive mom who serves as the Sr. Communications Coordinator for Lifesong for Orphans. Trisha is also a speaker and writer who has published 16 books. She lives in Michigan's Upper Peninsula, where she is wife to her husband, Luke, and is mom to three. In this episode, we explore why every adoptee’s experience is unique, how foster care and adoption teach us the complexity of love, why parenting any child is a leap of faith, and the importance of helping our children identify truth. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/trisha-priebe-244/

This week, I have a powerful story to share with you from a former foster child, adoptee, and advocate for human rights. I am honored to introduce you to my guest, Dr. Mary Ann McMillan. She is a passionate advocate for foster youth and adoptees, whose advocacy is deeply personal because it’s inspired by her own experience as an adoptee who spent many years in foster care. Mary Ann serves as a professor and administrator at Jessup University in California and has previously served as a missionary in Ukraine and the Czech Republic, leading trainings in nearly 30 countries. In this episode, you’ll hear Mary Ann’s personal experience in the foster care system, the importance of understanding and processing your past, the important role therapy has played in her story, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/mary-ann-mcmillan-243/

When foster care feels overwhelming, how do we hold on to hope? How do we define success? How do we find light when so much feels dark? Nate and Kristen Crew are my guests on the podcast today. They have been married for almost 15 years and have 7 children – four adopted through foster care and three by birth. Rather than a specific “calling” to foster, they pursued foster care out of a desire to live out the basic commands in Scripture to care for those who are vulnerable. Nate is a pastor at CityLight Church in Virginia and together they love to encourage others through what God has taught them. In this episode, you’ll hear how Nate and Kristen strive to live out their calling as Christians, the difference that reliance on God has made in their story, why it doesn’t require a “special moment” to start getting involved with foster care, how to hold on to hope when the journey is hard, and more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/nate-kristen-crew-242/

For teens (and for any child in foster care), how can we create spaces where they are safe, feel belonging, and develop their sense of independence? How can we give them involvement in the development of what that space looks like? My guest today is a dear friend, Chandler James. Chandler used to be an Advocate Coach here at The Forgotten Initiative and today is the Director of Church Mobilization for The Riverside Project, a nonprofit dedicated to transforming the foster care system in Houston. Chandler and his wife, Caitlin, are foster parents and are currently supporting four teens, three of whom have aged out of foster care and one that they have permanency of. In our conversation, you’ll hear helpful principles for creating a sense of belonging for children who have experienced trauma, the challenges they’ve experienced of supporting teens as young parents, how to communicate boundaries while providing independence, the importance of caring for teens in foster care, and so much more. Find links to resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/chandler-james-241/

You may have seen us talking about our brand new podcast Just Neighbors. Well today, we're sharing one of those conversations right here on The Forgotten Podcast! This was such a powerful episode, with challenging and honest takeaways for those who follow Christ in our complex world. Just Neighbors is a podcast for every believer who desires to live as Jesus lived – to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God and neighbor. My co-host, Ryan MacDonald, and I are joined by Dr. Krish Kandiah for this conversation about how to combine word and deed to provide belonging for our neighbors. Krish is the founder of The Sanctuary Foundation, a charity supporting refugees to find welcome, work, and worthwhile housing in the UK. His mission is to help solve some of society’s seemingly intractable problems through partnerships across civil society, faith communities, government, and philanthropy. In this episode, Krish helps us understand the important work they are doing, the largest challenges he sees for people who are removed from their homes, and how Christ followers should respond to the complex conflicts happening across our world. Beyond that, he guides us in seeing that displacement is happening all around us, as children are placed in foster care, people move to a new city for their jobs, and people feel like they don’t belong. Listen in! Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/krish-kandiah-240/

During the month of June, applications to become a TFI Advocate are open! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. Whether a child has experienced foster care or adoption, there is history and trauma to navigate. As you can imagine, this can spill over into eating habits, behavior issues, and affect children’s sleep. Many foster parents and caregivers experience the difficulty of seeking help from someone trained in both foster/adoptive backgrounds and sleep practices. That was the case for my guest, Allison Ezell. When her first adopted son came home from China in 2016, she spent years unsuccessfully searching for sleep help that took into account his history. Today, she now gets to do for others what no one could do for her all those years ago: build a bridge between sleep science principles and trauma-informed care. Allison is a Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant and a mom of four through birth, foster care, and international adoption. She has a special passion for working with foster and adoptive families who are navigating sleep issues with their children. In this episode, you’ll learn how isolating dealing with sleep issues in children who have experienced trauma can be, the importance of setting realistic expectations based on a child’s history and biology, navigating bedtime with multiple children, and so much more. Find resources and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/allison-ezell-239/

During the month of June, applications to become a TFI Advocate are open! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. We cover many topics here on The Forgotten Podcast from how to know when to start fostering, real stories of people throughout the foster care community, how churches can get involved, and more. But in this episode, we are talking about an aspect of foster parenting we don’t often address: What happens when you reach the end of the journey of active foster parenting? How do you know when you should be done fostering and begin providing wrap-around support? My guest, Lisa Robertson, knows all about this journey as her family made the hard choice to stop fostering in October of 2023 after many years of active foster parenting. She has been a foster and adoptive parent and is the Executive Director for Hope Bridge, a non-profit that advocates for change in the Ohio foster care system by mobilizing churches and equipping communities to serve. Lisa has many years of experience in advocacy, biological family relationship preservation, and the preventative work of keeping families together. It's never easy to let go of something that is so close to your heart. In this conversation, we discuss what questions foster parents should consider before closing their license, how to identify when it is time to stop fostering, the heaviest parts of letting go of such a large part of your life, the opportunities to still serve the foster care community after foster parenting, and much more. Find links to resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/lisa-robertson-238/