Two Bi Guys

This surprise episode introduces the upcoming book "Bisexual Married Men: Stories of Relationships, Acceptance, & Authenticity". The host explains the importance of studying bisexuality in the animal kingdom. The chapter explores the experiences of bisexual married men and the impact of coming out on their relationships. It emphasizes the significance of finding connection and community as a bisexual individual while acknowledging safety concerns.

ZENCASTR AI CLIPPING: Use my special link https://zen.ai/1XCrFVbuRtL8iY87izFTPw to receive an exclusive 20% discount on your first month of any paid plan.BUNNY SHOPPE: Use my special link https://zen.ai/63nDqXXSjVnoNkG9-hgQ-A to save 20% off your order at bunnyshoppe.com.I'm so excited for this episode, and I think you will love it, too! I finally got to interview Eliot Schrefer, author of "Queer Ducks (And Other Animals): The Natural World of Animal Sexuality", after picking up his book almost a year ago. The book focuses on scientific research into queerness in animals, which is much more common than most people think. Because sexuality has been viewed as so binary for many decades, scientists often observed same-sex sexual activity between animals and then labeled them as "gay", leading to arguments of animal homosexuality as an evolutionary byproduct, a mutation, a mistake, or a mystery. But the more these animals are studied, the more scientists are realizing that there are very few "gay" animals -- most of them are actually bisexual.In this interview, we discussed how that plays out, why bisexuality can actually be evolutionarily advantageous (the "bisexual advantage"), how different species have sex for different reasons and with different results, the complex social structures among different animals groups and how sex affects them, how certain animal behaviors can be instructive for humans, the concept of animals having queer sex without having or needing a queer "identity", why it's challenging to do and publish research about animal queerness, and how all of this information has affected Eliot's queer journey -- and what he hopes this knowledge can do for the next generation.Check out my Patreon for 20 extra minutes of bonus content in which we chatted about animals that defy the gender binary (not necessarily "trans" animals, because we can't ask them about their identity, but intersex animals and specific species that have to ability to change from male-to-female or female-to-male) as well as animals that have sexual or familial bonds that reflect our concept of polyamory as opposed to monogamy. In a human culture where queerness, gender fluidity, and polyamory are often stigmatized as "unnatural", these animals prove otherwise.Thanks for listening!Visit Eliot's website: https://www.eliotschrefer.com/Buy "Queer Ducks": https://www.harpercollins.com/products/queer-ducks-and-other-animals-eliot-schrefer?variant=39684198563874Episode art photo credit: Matt Wilson

For this episode I was so excited to welcome back season 4 guest Benjamin Perry, a Minister at Middle Church in NYC, to discuss his new book, "Cry, Baby: Why Our Tears Matter"! I loved Ben's book, and we had a fascinating chat about crying and how it relates to queerness and queer liberation.We discussed Ben's realization that he hadn't cried in years and had to teach himself how again (and how this was related to coming out as bisexual), the science of tears and the latest research on crying, how crying affects our social development and connections with other people, how we change when we cry, why our culture values NOT crying and what happens when we suppress tears, why men cry less than women and how expressing authentic emotions often conflicts with traditional masculinity (and how to overcome that), why tears are and have historically been important for the queer community,  and why crying is necessary to build a better society.There are 15 minutes of bonus material available on Patreon in which we dove deeper into the intersection of crying and queerness (as well as other intersections), discussed how "crocodile tears" can be weaponized to cause harm, and learned why we should believe people when they cry -- even if their reasoning is unsound. Subscribe here: https://www.patreon.com/robertbrookscohenYou can buy Ben's book here: https://www.broadleafbooks.com/store/product/9781506485119/Cry-BabyAnd follow Ben on X here: https://twitter.com/FaithfullyBPThanks for listening!

Bi+ people tend to look at gender differently than most, and many of us are working toward more gender equality, especially in romantic partnerships. That's why this week I'm excited to share my interview with Dr. Kate Mangino, a gender expert whose debut book, "Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home", looks at gender imbalances in our personal lives and what we can do about it.We chatted about the current landscape of domestic equality, how couples often split physical and emotional/cognitive labor, why women more often than not bear the brunt of the workload, how same-gender couples sometimes divide responsibilities differently (often because they are forced to write new scripts for themselves), how inequality can hurt men even (or especially) if they're doing "less work", what causes certain people to reflect on gender roles while others never think twice, what true equal partnerships look like (hint: equal responsibilities are not necessarily identical responsibilities), how to get there with your partner through communication, routines, and community support, how to raise kids who will grow up wanting to be equal partners themselves, and what to do when you WANT to fall into gendered roles sometimes.In bonus material on Patreon, we continued talking about balancing gender parity with individual strengths and weaknesses, the importance of community in supporting equal partnerships, and how to actually find a partner who wants equality in relationships. Head to Patreon.com/RobertBrooksCohen to listen! (You'll also get EARLY ACCESS to AD-FREE episodes!)Follow Kate on Twitter: https://twitter.com/ManginoKateBuy Kate's book: https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250855787/equalpartnersVisit Kate's Website: https://www.katemangino.com/Connect with Kate on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/katemanginoState of the World's Fathers report: http://stateoftheworldsfathers.org/

Vaneet is back, and since his last visit to Two Bi Guys, he wrote his first book, "Bisexual Men Exist: A Handbook for Bisexual, Pansexual and M-Spec Men" -- available now wherever books are sold! We chatted about the process of researching, writing, and promoting his book before diving into its contents: Bi+ representation in media, coming out, dating and relationships, M-Spec intersectionality, what "M-Spec" means and why Vaneet wanted to use an "agnostic" term like that in his book's title, how queerness crosses over between sexuality and gender, how to find pride in a Bi+ or M-Spec identity, and much, much more.If you've listened to this podcast before, you probably already believe that Bi+ men exist, but in Vaneet's book, this is the BEGINNING of the conversation, not the ultimate message. We exist, AND once we get beyond convincing people of this basic truth, there's so much more to discuss and learn about our community. Listen for an in-depth, free-flowing, true Bi+ 2.0 conversation, featuring two bi guys!There are over 25 minutes of bonus content with Vaneet on my new Patreon -- we chatted more about dating and the huge variety of relationship styles among the Bi+ community, why certain relationships can be considered a success even if they eventually end, Bi+ invisibility in mental and sexual health research, intersectionality with a focus on the asexual and aromantic spectrums, and more about the challenges of writing Bi+ books in general and what we’d like to see more of in the Bi+ activist space. Subscribe here: www.Patreon.com/RobertBrooksCohenThanks for listening!Buy Vaneet's book: https://us.jkp.com/products/bisexual-men-existFollow Vaneet on IG: https://www.instagram.com/nintendomad888/Get 20% off Liquid I.V. -- https://zen.ai/APzgr1I0sD6_kQntndiKfA

I finally got to interview Jessica Fern, author of one of my favorite books, "Polysecure"! I've been reading and re-reading this book for a couple years now, and it has helped me enormously in navigating polyamory and understanding how my own attachment style might affect various partnerships.In this interview, we discussed Jessica's bi identity and poly journey, why the intersection between polyamory and attachment theory is so important, the SPECTRUM of attachment styles (rather than four distinct categories, as it is often framed), why monogamy has been seen as a cultural ideal (and how that's changing today), why non-monogamy can feel threatening to some people (and how to work through that), the SPECTRUM of boundaries and how to course-correct when we go too far in either direction, love as an infinite resource or muscle that can grow, the SPECTRUM of non-monogamous relationship styles (noticing a theme...?), pervasive poly-negativity and the importance of finding like-minded community, how transitioning from monogamy to polyamory can change your attachment style, where jealousy comes from and how to use it to deepen a relationship, and how to have secure attachment with yourself.There are five extra minutes of bonus content only on Patreon in which we continued talking about jealousy (and other things we’re taught to repress from a young age), as well as why polyamory is “relatively insecure” compared to monogamy -- and why Jessica thinks that can actually be a good thing. www.Patreon.com/RobertBrooksCohenVisit www.JessicaFern.com for info on her books, seminars/webinars, psychotherapy practice, coaching, and more.Get 20% of Liquid I.V. -- https://zen.ai/APzgr1I0sD6_kQntndiKfA

Welcome to Season 6 of Two Bi Guys! Our premiere episode features Zachary Zane, back for his second Two Bi Guys interview, and we discussed his awesome new "memoir and manifesto", BOYSLUT.We chatted about sexual shame, the relationship between porn and queerness, kinks, fetishes, dom/sub dynamics, Zach's book tour and the surprising "controversies" that have popped up, the joys of anal stimulation -- when done correctly (and how to do that), why it can be beneficial to come out if you're married and monogamous, unlearning what society teaching us about sex, rejection, therapy, lube, and much more!Can't get enough? There are 20 extra minutes of bonus content with Zach on my new Patreon (found here: https://www.patreon.com/robertbrookscohen -- or find the link in our social media bio). There, we talked about Zach’s pornstar boyfriend, our thoughts on starting our own OnlyFans (and possible collaboration...), sexual queerness v. cultural queerness, non-monogamy and polyamory, and the play parties Zach has been hosting in NYC, Boyslut and Bislut. Thanks for listening!Use my special link https://zen.ai/QysyWDhMy1HLyR-9UhkgCQ to save 30% off your first month of any Zencastr paid plan.

Happy season 5 finale! We finally got to chat with Maz Hedgehog (they/them), a UK-based bisexual writer, poet, and performer working in the spaces between real and unreal, poetry and theatre, self and other. We chatted about Maz’s bisexual journey, how they realized they were agender and what that means for them, why Maz identifies as a “bisexual dyke” (like Shiri Eisner!), and how their gender and sexuality inform their artistic work, like their recent solo show, “Let Me Count the Ways”. We also discussed the challenges of getting queer art published & produced, how to deal with rejection and failure, how fashion is a form of speech that communicates who we are, and the value of collaboration and imperfection. Also fairies!Thanks for listening to season 5! Rob will be taking an extended hiatus before season 6 to work on his oral history book, “Bisexual Married Men: Stories of Relationships, Acceptance, and Authenticity”, to be published by Routledge. Stay tuned for info and updates as well as some bonus content and surprises. And please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, and tell your friends -- thanks!Visit Maz’s website: https://www.mazhedgehog.com/Buy Maz’s books: https://www.mazhedgehog.com/shopFollow Maz on Twitter: https://twitter.com/MazHedgehogFollow Maz on IG: https://www.instagram.com/mazhedgehog/“Fat, Black, and Myself: Fashion in the Pandemic”: https://azmagazine.co.uk/fat-black-and-myself-fashion-in-the-pandemic/“Let Me Count the Ways” music composed by Alpha Twang. Follow them on IG: https://www.instagram.com/alpha_twang/Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrWe're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohenGo to blendjet.com and use code twobiguys12 to save 12% off your order OR use my special link and the discount will be applied at checkout zen.ai/twobiguys12

This week we’re talking bisexual play parties with the founder and “Chief Conspirator” of the New Society For Wellness (aka NSFW), Daniel Saynt! We chatted about Daniel’s early awareness of his bisexuality, keeping it hidden throughout his conservative religious upbringing, and how entering the world of fashion both exposed him to more sexual fluidity but also convinced him that more openness and transparency was needed. We then focused on the club he founded, NSFW, and how & why it’s specifically geared toward the bisexual community. We discussed play party etiquette and enthusiastic consent, how to overcome anxiety about attending sex parties (and performance anxiety during them), the differences between play parties and kink parties, how norms in sexual spaces can change depending on the gender identity of those involved, why bisexual men seem to love NSFW’s “Frat”-themed party so much (which includes consensual “forced” hazing and bi play), and how queer parties can set themselves apart from “swinger” events. We also talked about weed! Don’t miss it.The New Society For Wellness: https://www.ns-fw.com/Follow Daniel on IG: https://www.instagram.com/danielsaynt/Follow Daniel on Twitter: https://twitter.com/danielsayntFollow NS-FW on IG: https://www.instagram.com/wearethensfw/Follow NS-FW on Twitter: https://twitter.com/wearensfwBuy the FirmTech Tech Ring or Performance Ring: https://myfirmtech.com/collections/firmtechTwo Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrWe're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohenGo to blendjet.com and use code twobiguys12 to save 12% off your order OR use my special link and the discount will be applied at checkout zen.ai/twobiguys12

Continuing our UK-themed season, this week we sat down with Lois Shearing, a bi activist, freelance journalist and writer based in London. We chatted about their journey along the sexuality and gender spectrums, the many Bi+ groups they’ve been part of and helped organize (including the Bisexual Survivors’ Network, the London Bi Pandas, and an LGBT+ knitting club), and their popular writing about bisexuality that’s been published by The Independent, The Advocate, INTO, Openly, and more.We then chatted about Lois’ book, “Bi The Way: The Bisexual Guide to Life”, which was published in 2021, highlighting topics such as being “really bi”, bisexuality as freedom, the bi v. pan “debate”, the challenges of coming out, how to find Bi+ community (and why it’s so important), and how sexuality and gender can be interrelated and interdependent. We also covered quite a few next-level Bi 2.0 topics, as I like to call them – check out the episode for some spicy takes!Buy “Bi The Way: The Bisexual Guide to Life”: https://www.hachette.co.uk/titles/lois-shearing/bi-the-way/9781787752900/Follow Lois on Twitter: https://twitter.com/LoShearingFollow Lois in Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loisfaith95/Follow Lois on Medium: https://medium.com/@lois.shearingLois' Website: https://faithfullwords.wordpress.com/“Why Bisexuality is a Threat to Terf Politics”: https://medium.com/@lois.shearing/why-bisexuality-is-a-threat-to-terf-politics-5f2b40563e11Two Bi Guys is produced and edited by Rob CohenCreated by Rob Cohen and Alex BoydLogo art by Kaitlin WeinmanMusic by Ross MintzerWe are supported by The GothamMade on Zencastr #MadeOnZencastrUse my special link zen.ai/twobiguys1 and use twobiguys1 to save 30% off your first three months of Zencastr professional. #madeonzencastrTry MagicMind and get 20% off your order or 40% off a subscription with promo code BIGUYS20: www.magicmind.co/biguysThis podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/twobiguys to get 10% off your first month.We're going on a Bi+ trip to Maine in June 2023! Join the email list to get all the info: https://my.trovatrip.com/public/l/survey/rob-cohen