Horror Movie Talk

Synopsis Perfect Blue follows the story of Mima, a pop star who turns her life around to become an aspiring actress. As she goes deeper into her role on a crime thriller tv show, she realizes that someone might be stalking her. The line between reality and acting becomes thinner and thinner as the anxiety of fame and her potential stalker rise. Review This movie is impeccable. Director Satoshi Kon forces the viewer to descend into Mima’s madness by blurring the line between real and fantasy throughout the course of the film with quick cuts, disorienting scenes, and an overall sense of unknowingness. Making an anime horror film be this good, this widely received and revered is no easy feat, but Kon makes it look like a cake walk. This is one of my favorite movies of all time, and one of my favorite directors of all time. The sense of dread, doom, and anxiety get bigger and bigger until it all comes to a head at the end of the movie. It is emotional, thrilling, scary, and hard to follow, but that is what makes it perfect. Perfect blue. Get it. Haha Score 10/10

Synopsis Based on the 1976 novel by Anne Rice, Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles tells the autobiographical story of a Vampire named Louis de Pointe du Lac (played by Brad Pitt) being turned and taught by the vampire Lestat (Tom Cruise). They are just very good vampire friends and totally not gay.  After becoming a vampire, Louis discovers he has great powers, and uses them to have the poutiest mouth and become as emo as possible. He makes a lot of friends along the way, including Kirsten Dunst playing a pedo’s dream, as well as Zorro. Review of Interview with the Vampire (1994) This is probably my favorite vampire movie, so I’m biased, but I still think it holds up. It focuses on the coolest part of the vampire stories, the vampires, and gets rid of the pesky humans. This is also probably one of my favorite roles of Tom Cruise. His playfulness and arrogance as Lestat carries the majority of the movie.  Kirsten Dunst also puts in one of the greatest performances of her career as a convincing forty year old in a child’s body. Brad Pitt is the only one that upon rewatching becomes less interesting every reviewing. There’s really nothing for him to do other than pout and look pretty. But granted, he does that very well here. What the film does best is maintain a vibe of sexy morbidness.  Seeing this in my youth, I was distracted by the boobs in this movie, and only now realize how extremely gay coded the film is. Louis’s alternating between reveling in being a vampire and being shamed by it really represented what it must have felt like to be gay in the early 90s. The director Neil Jordan had just come off of directing The Crying Game and was really at the peak of his powers. Looking at his IMDB page, it’s only been downhill from here.  Stan Winton’s special effects and makeup is perfectly understated and makes the vampires seem otherworldly and the killings properly visceral. A lot of stars aligned with this film and I still think it stands the test of time. If you want to watch a bunch of sexy vampires almost kissing, this is the movie for you. Score 10/10

Synopsis A couple embarks on a journey across the country for their five year anniversary. After their car breaks down in the middle of nowhere Oregon, they have no choice but to stay in a cabin in the woods. When Ryan, played by Froy Gutierrez, runs back into town to grab something he forgot out of his car, Maya played by Madeline Petsch starts hearing and seeing strange things in the cabin, almost like someone else is in the house. Review of The Strangers Chapter 1 I really hated this movie. Like, really hated. I didn’t really know what to expect, but taking what didn’t work from the original and even at some points taking direct lines and situations from the original and cramming it into the already too long 90 minute run time was atrocious. I don’t know if I was just tired, but I almost fell asleep at multiple points due to boredom. At the beginning of the movie, there is text on screen that says this movie will show us one of the most brutal crimes committed in America. I will tell you, I have seen worse things on Twitter in the past week. The writing is terrible, it plays like a crappy ripoff of a Wayans Brothers film, I seriously laughed at a lot of points that were not supposed to be funny out of pure hatred. The two main characters who are supposed to be in a five year loving relationship have zero chemistry. Every action they take in trying to survive is the dumbest route they could have chosen. I really really hated this movie. It was bad. It degrades the masterpiece that is the original, and I mean that. The original is an incredibly scary and moving horror film, and this one shits all over it. I walked out of the theater chuckling to myself. Score 2/10

Synopsis Arachnophobia is a movie about Ross, a doctor who moves with his family to a rural town to take over the practice of the town doctor. When a Venezuelan spider arrives in the town through extremely unlikely circumstances, Ross must unravel the mysterious deaths in the town as killer spiders ravish the community. The townsfolk are dropping like flies, and it seems like the only hope for this city is a ragtag team of spider experts/doctors/exterminators/interns. Will they overcome the eight-legged hoard? Or will they be consumed by the hellish nightmare that is the common house spider? Review of Arachnophobia Arachnophobia is directed by Frank Marshall from a screenplay written by Don Jakoby and Wesley Strick. Starring Jeff Daniels as Ross and John Goodman as the exterminator, this movie gives a goofy and fun story that scares me to no end. I couldn’t get past a single scene without checking to see if there was a creepy crawly on my body. This movie is entertaining and enjoyable to watch, even for an arachnophobe like me. The story feels improbable, but not so far-fetched that the average spider hater won’t feel incredibly uncomfortable in their own home for weeks after watching. Score 8/10

Synopsis A group of friends rent a mansion to celebrate one of their birthdays and run out of alcohol. In their search around the house for more booze they stumble upon an old hand painted tarot deck and Haley, the friend who can read tarot cards, reads all of their horoscopes. Then chaos ensues as they start being killed one by one by the embodiment of the ruling cards in their individual readings. Review This movie isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen but it is also not very good. I did like the costumes and effects of the tarot card creatures, there were a few funny lines (and by a few I mean two), but the script and acting was definitely lacking, leading it to be predictable and a bit silly in a bad way. I was worried that this movie was going to be very offensive toward tarot as a whole, but it took a different direction than I had originally thought, but it still wasn’t perfect either. I wasn’t fully entertained, I scoffed at a lot of moves the characters made, but I wasn’t completely bored either.  Score 4/10

Synopsis The Birds is a romantic comedy turned aviation nightmare. When the rich socialite and practical joker Melanie runs into a charming lawyer named Mitch in a bird shop, she does the creepiest thing ever and tracks down his name and address. After driving hours to get to his weekend home in a small town called Bodega Bay. As Mitch and Melanie slowly but surely fall in love, the birds in the area seem to be going crazy and possibly waging a Planet of the Apes-style war except in this movie, the apes are birds. Eyes are plucked out. Hair is messed up. They kiss. What more could you ask for?  Review of The Birds The Birds, directed by Alfred Hitchcock, is a movie that cant really surprise you in any way. It’s basically exactly what you would expect it to be, a movie about birds that attack people. Melanie played by Tippi Hedren is annoying at times, but her creepy love for Mitch played by Rod Taylor is enjoyable enough to keep me engaged with the film. For me, it almost seemed random how the movie would be focusing on the relationship that building between these characters, and them some bird would just swoop out of the air and attack. There isn’t a lot of buildup or explanation about why the birds are attacking. In fact there is even a moment where the characters meet a bird expert, which would have been a good time to maybe give some information about why all this might be happening, but the bird expert somehow is completely wrong about everything she says, making me wonder why they even included that scene at all. In the end, it is a fine movie that kept me engaged enough throughout most of it but not really anything special to me.  Score  6/10

The newest horror movie Abigail from the guys that directed Ready or Not and the latest Scream movies, is in theaters now. Despite the trailer spoiling everything, it’s still a fun ride. Synopsis An elite operative team is assembled to kidnap a billionaire’s 12 year old daughter for ransom. They soon realize that they are in over their heads once it’s revealed the little girl played by Matilda’s Alisha Weir, is actually a centuries old vampire. Wacky hijinks ensue. Review of Abigail I had a mix of high expectations and low expectations going into this film. While the director’s filmography included Ready or Not, one of my favorite recent horror movies, the trailer pretty much gives away the whole plot, and had low quality Blumhouse vibes. I ended up really liking the movie. It’s going to be one of those movies that the less you know about it the more that you’ll like it. It establishes a micro subgenre of switcheroo vampire movies with From Dusk Till Dawn.  The film starts out as a typical heist thriller that knowingly points out the cliche archetypes of the assembled team, then quickly subverts them by giving them slightly more depth.   The titular character Abigail seems a completely innocent victim, but there is something off about her that makes you ask, is this bad child acting, or is this character hiding something? It ends up being both. While the movie is fun, there aren’t many super memorable moments, and plays out largely as you would expect.  The film loses something in the end with a twist that seems sudden and unearned when allegiances are changed in arbitrary ways. Score 7/10

Synopsis Creep 2 continues the story of Aaron, played by Mark Duplass, a serial killer who posts want ads on craigslist seeking documentarians who inadvertently film their own murders. Sara, played by Desiree Akhavan, has a failing Youtube show and decides to take Aaron up on his offer. Throughout her documentary of Aaron, she empathizes with him and barely believes him while he swears he’s a serial killer. On the other hand, Aaron seems like he has finally found his match. Will he kill her? Will she kill him? Is this the end of the craigslist serial killer as we know it? Review of Creep 2 Creep 2 is one of those sequels that actually gives a fresh look on the original. It does not repeat overdone tropes or follow the same story line whatsoever. This movie could stand alone and it still makes sense, and would still be very effective. There are funny one-liners, there are jump scares, there is a bad ass woman who won’t take any shit. This is not your typical killer chases victim movie. Besides the original, this movie is a fresh take on found footage horror, which is my favorite genre. It is excellent, it pulls all punches, and it takes you on a very adventurous ride. This truly is an exceptional feat of horror movie making as we know it. Creep was good enough, inventive enough, but this sequel takes it to a whole nother level. My only few complaints are that there could have been more fleshing out of Sara, since she is the central character, and I think knowing what’s gonna happen upon rewatching makes it a bit less effective. Other than that, it’s pretty damn good. Score 8/10

Synopsis The First Omen is a catholic horror movie and prequel to the movie The Omen. Maggie or Margaret is a catholic sister who moves from the United States to work in an all-girls orphanage and take her vows as a nun. While there she takes to a troubled girl named Carleta who seems to be slipping through the cracks of the orphanage while the other nuns consider her a lost cause and disturbed child. As she learns more about Carleta’s past Maggie struggles to protect her from the church which seems to have a sinister plan for her. The devil is involved. It’s a whole thing. The First Omen is directed by Arkasha Stevenson who co-wrote the movie with Tim Smith and Keith Thomas. Nell Tiger Free stars as Margaret and gives a stunning performance as a young nun.  Review of The First Omen The first omen is everything that Immaculate wishes it could be. It’s dark and sinister, giving a fresh and incredibly disturbing take on catholic horror.  The movie is long, which I am known for being a critic of, but I didn’t check my watch once during this two-hour-long movie. Its shocking without being distasteful, and Nell Free’s character Margaret is a delight to watch and gives a performance that I think will be studied and copied by many possession movies to come. Even with some of the seemingly out-of-nowhere revelations that keep the plot moving I enjoyed each twist and turn. Its scary, it’s disturbing, and it’s fun.  Score 8/10

Synopsis This movie, directed by John Harrison, is based off the TV series of the same name. It follows a wraparound story about a kid that is going to be cooked by a woman who kidnapped him, and he tries to get out of it by telling her stories from the titular book. This movie is an anthology, with one wraparound story and three tales from the darkside, filled with frights, fun, blood, and gore. Review of Tales From the Darkside: The Movie This movie is very 1990. The style, the gore remind me of late 80s early 90s horror. I have never seen the TV show, but I can see how this film could be nostalgic to those who grew up in the 80s and had a knack for horror movies. It’s always a hit or a miss when a TV show becomes a movie, but in this case, I think it is a romp. It’s fun, the gore is good, but it’s not very scary. With a 93 minute runtime and a star studded cast, I don’t think you could go very wrong with this movie. With all anthologies though, there are going to be stories within the film that are not very good, and this movie is no exception. All in all, it is a fun time. I didn’t hate it. If it wasn’t so predictable, I would give it a higher score, but it’s very average and that is okay sometimes. We don’t wanna watch the best movie of all time every single day. Score 5/10