Financial Feminist

Why do we stay in jobs, relationships, and financial patterns we know aren't working? Author and journalist Simone Stolzoff is back on the show to talk about his new book, How to Not Know — and the surprising answer has everything to do with our relationship with uncertainty. We're getting into the three certainty traps keeping you stuck, why more information is actually making your anxiety worse, the difference between one-way and two-way door decisions, and what it really takes to break the cycle when you can see the problem but can't seem to move. This is one of the most powerful conversations we've had on this show, and one you'll want to send to everyone you know. Simone’s links: How to Not Know: https://bookshop.org/a/90037/9781324089452 Learn the exact strategies to save money, pay off debt, improve your money mindset, increase your net worth, in The $100K Club. Get the details here: ⁠https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod⁠. 00:00 Intro  01:08 Why Uncertainty Feels Worse Than Bad News 03:14 Three Certainty Traps: Comfort, Hubris & Control 04:49 Why We Struggle to Admit We Were Wrong 05:36 Identity, Doubling Down & Changing Your Mind 10:23 Why Our Tolerance for Uncertainty Is Declining 14:28 More Information, More Anxiety 16:18 Escalating Commitment 16:52 Stop Loss Strategies & Rules-Based Decision Making 20:13 Outsourcing Your Willpower & Knowing Your "Enough" 28:08 Connie & Andrew's "Year of Living Dangerously" 30:21 How to Run Your Own Low-Stakes Life Experiment 35:16 One-Way Door vs. Two-Way Door Decisions 44:39 Ghost Ships: Making Peace with the Paths Not Taken 50:39 The Miscarriage, the Uncertainty & Finding Your Anchors 54:54 How to Not Know Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You might be the loneliest you've ever been — and have no idea why. One of my favorite guests and favorite humans, Liz Moody, is back on the show to talk about why loneliness isn't an exposure problem. It's not about being around more people. It's a discomfort problem. We're getting into why our frictionless, optimized lives are quietly killing our ability to connect, what it actually takes to build real friendships from scratch, why vulnerability is the shortcut nobody wants to take, and the one shift you can make this week that will move you toward deeper connection — no new plans required. Liz’s links: Website: https://www.lizmoody.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lizmoody/  Podcast: https://www.lizmoody.com/the-liz-moody-podcast/  Book: A Hundred Ways to Change Your Life: http://Bookshopbookshop.org/a/90037/9780063333710  Not sure what to do with your money? Visit ⁠https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod⁠ and take our FREE Money Plan Quiz to get your personalized money plan, and find any resources mentioned on our show! 00:00 Intro 00:13 Why We've Never Been More Connected — Yet More Alone 02:34 The "Creation Era" of Friendship & Why Discomfort Is the Price of Connection 03:23 The Cozy Era vs. The Creation Era of Friendship 06:17 Loneliness Is a Discomfort Problem, Not an Exposure Problem 11:37 Misdiagnosing Loneliness — What You're Actually Missing 13:05 The Harvard Study of Adult Development & the #1 Predictor of a Long Life 14:59 Face-Down Phone Theory & What Your Phone Is Costing Your Relationships 11:27 Match Theory: Stop Impressing, Start Finding Your People 17:32 The 50-Hour Rule: How Long It Really Takes to Make a Friend 21:17 From Transaction to Connection — Getting Past Tit for Tat 21:13 Human Beings vs. Human Doings: Productivity Culture & Friendship 38:21 Shared Experiences, Novelty & Building Deeper Bonds 38:16 "Abouts" — The Secret Ingredient to Lasting Friendships 50:24 Healthy Solitude vs. Loneliness (and Why Most of Us Never Actually Rest) 58:20 The One Shift to Make This Week If You Feel Lonely Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if every bill you're already paying could get you closer to a free flight? Today I'm talking to Shakeemah "Keem" Smith — founder of Bills to Boarding Passes, solo travel educator, and the woman her family literally nicknamed The Passport Abuser — to talk about how she's traveled to nearly 100 countries without paying out of pocket for a single flight in three years. And no, you don't need a high-limit credit card or a six-figure salary to do this. Keem breaks down her Bills to Boarding Passes method, the airline partnerships most people have never heard of, why solo travel might be the most powerful thing you do for yourself this year, and the exact first steps to take this week, no matter your income, your debt situation, or your starting point. You’re gonna want to share this episode with a friend! Ready to turn your everyday bills into free flights? Sign up for our FREE Bills to Boarding Passes workshop with Keem & Tori: ⁠https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod⁠ Compare the cheapest flights from all major airlines at ⁠Skyscanner.com⁠ Visit https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod to find our credit card recommendations and any other resources mentioned on our show! 00:00 Intro 01:36 Your Bills Are Your Boarding Passes 04:07 Airline Miles vs. Credit Card Points: What's the Difference? 07:05 How Airlines Make Money When You're Not Flying  09:32 Earning Miles on Your Utility Bills (NRG Partnership) 11:03 How Keem Got to Her First 20 Countries for Under $100  13:55 How to Travel for Free Without a Credit Card  16:22 What Started Solo Travel: A Friendship Betrayal in Amsterdam 19:10 Learning to Enjoy Your Own Company at 30 21:29 Traveling as a Black Woman — Safety, Research & Real Talk 28:24 Actionable Steps for the Woman Who Thinks She Can't Afford to Travel 31:44 Japan for $6 — Three Times (and Other Receipt-Worthy Receipts) 35:19 Treating Retailers Like You Treat Men: The 2-Out-of-3 Rule 38:44 Country That Surprised Me Most: Kuwait 39:31 The One Thing I Always Pack: A Carbon Monoxide Detector 41:27 Worst Travel Disaster: Saint Kitts Airport Scam 44:45 Best Flight Deal: $5 Flights as a Lifestyle 45:42 Most Underrated Solo Destination: Antigua and Barbuda 47:20 Final Message to the Woman Who Thinks Travel Isn't for Her Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A practical blueprints-style breakdown of how to save your first $100K in today’s economy. Topics include what still works from past playbooks, the new obstacles like rent and wage stagnation, and why tiny cuts no longer cut it. The host lays out seven concrete steps — from automating savings to prioritizing income growth and values-based spending — with real numbers and a free guide to get started.

Bricia Lopez, chef and restaurateur behind LA’s celebrated Oaxacan restaurant Guelaguetza, shares how family, food, and culture shaped her path. She talks making money from scratch, protecting quality during hard times, the “margarita vs. martini” perspective on value, and keeping cultural roots central while building wealth.

Dr. Nicole Murray (Dr. Nick), a neuropsychologist who specializes in executive functioning and decision-making, breaks down the brain biology behind emotional money choices. Short takes cover dopamine and urgency, why “I’m bad with money” is a story not a fact, an intensity gauge for decisions, building systems to replace impulse spending, and using self-compassion to rebuild financial habits.

Kara Loewentheil, founder of the School of New Feminist Thought and author of Take Back Your Brain, shares coaching-based psychology on confidence and mindset. She explains the Confidence Compass: self-knowledge, self-compassion, self-belief, and self-actualization. Conversations cover why power poses and fake-it tactics fail, how shame hides as responsibility, and practical small-step tools to build real, lasting self-trust.

Practical steps for setting a total trip cap and avoiding post-trip financial stress. How to break a vacation into real budget categories and build a sinking fund by planning backwards. Tips for finding cheap flights by being flexible and using points. Smart cost-cutting ideas that do not ruin the trip, plus alternatives if the dream getaway is not affordable yet.

If paying off debt is starting to feel like it's swallowing your whole life–– this episode is for you. Today I’m getting honest with you about something the personal finance world doesn't say enough: debt payoff isn't just a numbers problem, it's an emotional one. The mental load of tracking balances, watching interest undo your progress, and feeling like you have to earn joy before you've hit zero is exhausting, and it's not what sustainable financial freedom looks like. In this episode, I'm giving you the pep talk you actually need, breaking down why hyper-vigilance around debt isn't discipline, what to do when debt payoff has consumed your entire personality, and four practical ways to protect your energy so you can keep going without burning out. Watch How to Payoff Credit Card Debt FAST: ⁠https://youtu.be/qLR-x0Zg4eY⁠  Visit https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod to join the free 5-Day Debt Payoff Challenge!  00:00 Intro 00:23 The Pep Talk You Need 01:16 Debt as Cognitive Labor 01:50 Why Debt Payoff Feels So Hard 02:28 Shame & Moral Failure Around Debt 03:02 The Invisible, Unpaid Work of Debt 03:52 Hyper-Vigilance Is Not Discipline 04:15 When Debt Becomes Your Whole Identity 05:22 You Don't Have to Suffer to Be Responsible 08:02 4 Ways to Protect Your Energy 08:09 #1 – Automate Everything 09:00 #2 – Stop Checking Your Accounts Daily 10:52 #3 – Give Yourself Permission to Have a Personality 11:24 #4 – Slow Progress Beats Burnout 11:33 Closing Thoughts Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If there's one episode I need every woman in your life to hear, it's this one — because what Erin and I unpack together has the power to completely transform the way you show up for yourself and the women around you. Erin Gallagher is the CEO and founder of Hype Women, an inclusive network unlocking women's access to human, social, and financial capital, and the author of the book Hype Women. In this episode, we get into the real reason women are conditioned to put everyone else first, how to tell the difference between anxiety and intuition, and why you cannot build real wealth, real friendships, or a real life until you stop abandoning yourself. We walk through the three stages of metamorphosis, and break down the spectrum from mean girl to hype woman so you can finally audit the women in your life (and the woman inside your head). This episode is the pep talk you didn't know you needed. Erin’s links: Website: www.hypewomen.com  Visit ⁠https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod⁠ to see the show notes and read the transcript of this episode! 00:00 Intro 01:08 The Phrase That Changed Everything 02:55 Why Women Abandon Themselves 06:40 The Constant Threat Assessment 09:45 Remembering Who You Are 13:30 The Difference Between Intuition and Anxiety 17:40 Is It Still Working? 21:00 The Three Stages: Caterpillar, Cocoon, Monarch 25:10 Looking Around at 40 29:30 Renegotiating Your Life 33:15 The Mean Girl Inside of Us 37:00 You Can't Hype Others Until You Hype Yourself 41:45 Recognizing Your Conditioning 46:00 The Five Types on the Spectrum 51:00 Learning to Hype Yourself 56:00 Building Your A-Team 60:00 The Power of Women's Communities Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices