Order of Man

Society is becoming softer. Society is becoming weaker. This idea of softness is perpetuated by much of society, the school system, media, and entertainment and Hollywood. We do ourselves a huge disservice when we overlook the importance of being strong, tough, gritty, resilient, and all the things that we would traditionally think of when we think of how a man shows up in life. I'm not suggesting by any means that a man can't be loving, supportive, open, and vulnerable. Of course, he can be those things. There is a time and a place to be that way but to say that that's always the case, to say that we need to be softer at the expense of these other masculine virtues, is hurting society in general. There will come a point in time where those traditional masculine virtues are to be used in order to produce productive outcomes for ourselves, our loved ones, and the people we care about. Typically, this manifests itself in a negative situation, whether that's something in the family like a divorce, loss of a loved one, or being laid off from a job, but it also applies to natural disasters and emergencies. For example, Hurricane Harvey in Texas and the fires in California last year. During these times, we saw countless men, step up and do what it is that men do best. We also see why strength is important in the global arena as well when it comes to military conflict, for example. It's critical we never overlook the importance of harnessing the power of being tough, resilient, gritty, et cetera. Today, I want to talk with you about some of the consequences and symptoms of the softening of society. And, I also want to talk about why softness is spreading. I'm not a conspiracy theorist but I do think there are some factors at work here that are promoting this idea of clinging to these softer virtues at the expense of the harder virtues. We're going to talk about how we can become tougher, more resilient, and stronger because the last thing I want to do is complain, whine, or nag about a topic without providing any solutions. www.orderofman.com/FFN112 Please leave us a rating and review!

In a world where everyone and everything is clamoring for your attention, it is becomingly increasingly difficult to focus on the vital few as opposed to the trivial many. My guest today, Greg McKeown, the New York Times Bestselling Author of Essentialism, makes the case for why less can actually be more. We talk about how to eliminate distractions, the criteria for measuring what task you should actually focus on, how to establish proper boundaries, and why every man should take on the disciplined pursuit of less. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS Why focusing on less can be more How to ensure only the right things get done The difference between thinking broadly and deeply Establishing criteria to measure your decisions How to eliminate the things that don't matter How to effectively establish proper boundaries How to refine and hone your gut instinct Establishing practices for systematic execution Why small wins are vital How using the word 'no' is a liberating exercise Moving your thinking from "can't" to "don't" Focusing on the vital few rather than the trivial many How to create more space (physical and mental) in your life GREG MCKEOWN Gentlemen, I want to introduce you to my guest today, Mr. Greg McKeown. He is a man who needs no introduction for many of you. If you're familiar with his work at all, you've likely read the book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. In this New York Times Bestselling book, Greg makes the case for why each of us should strive to focus on the few things that actually matter as opposed to the tasks and projects many of us get bogged down with. He's spoken all over the world at industry conferences, huge companies like Apple, Google, Facebook, and Twitter, and governments including a personal invitation from the Prince of Norway. Needless to say, this is a man who knows what he's talking about when it comes to doing less but producing more. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/169 Website: http://orderofman.com

I see so many men who don't have any level of respect for themselves let alone being able to command any respect from others. I was noticing the other day as I was walking to the post office, that there were people who wouldn't even look me in the eye. And, not only would they not look me in the eye, they were working hard to ensure that they didn't have to look me in the eye. When I shake people's hand, I get these limp fish handshakes. Those are just two small examples of the manifestation of a lack of confidence. It's bad, guys. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You've seen this in co-workers, friends, kids, and maybe even yourself. And, if you're someone who is not commanding respect, you are living a life less than you're capable of. I don't want that to be the case. I want you, as a man to step up, to be assertive, confident, to be able to ask for promotions, ask women on dates, and get out of this life what you should. And, part of that is being able to command the respect of other people. When I talk about commanding respect, one of the things that I'm really addressing here is the idea of the "X-factor." We've all seen it. We've all been to a meeting, conference or office setting when we just feel somebody walk into the room. We turn around and see this guy who has "it," whatever "it" is. We can't quite put our finger on it but we know that this is a guy that has something special; there's something unique about this individual. What a lot of men do is write that off and dismiss it as something that he was naturally gifted or naturally born with. Sure, there may be men who have a predisposition to be more like this but I'll tell you what, being able to develop what most people write off as the "X-factor" is something that can be developed. I know this because that's what I've been able to do. For a long time (especially when I was younger) I walked around very insecure, very complacent, and frankly just a little bit afraid and scared of life in general. I couldn't make eye contact with people. I couldn't hold a conversation. And not only that, I actually just tried to avoid people altogether. It wasn't up until relatively recently that I have been able to develop a level of confidence that allows me to look in another person's eyes. This newfound level of confidence allows me to ask and command exactly what I believe I deserve. I'm just telling you, from experience, it's a significantly better way to live. I made a post on Instagram two or three weeks ago about teaching others how to treat you. A lot of people agreed with me and said, "Yeah, you definitely teach other people how to treat you," and other people blew that off and dismissed it. I believe that you and I are constantly teaching other people how we will be treated. We do this through our actions and our words and the way we carry ourselves We teach our kids, spouses, colleagues, employers, and bosses to what level of respect we will be treated with. That's the last thing I want to see in men. I want men to walk around with their heads held high. I want them to have a level of confidence in what they're doing, who they are, and how they show up because I believe that this will, first, save their sanity and well-being and, second, determine much of their success. www.orderofman.com/FFN111 Please leave us a rating and review!

We all know that we need to be mentally tough. There's no question of that. Yet, forging mental toughness seems to be one of the most elusive pursuits. All of us know how to develop physical toughness but rarely do we have any practices in place that will help us develop mental toughness. My guest today, Ryan Lange, is one of the most mentally tough men I know. It's amazing considering he's only 21 years old. I won't get into all that he's accomplished just yet but please understand that the amount of physical strain he's put on his body is simply incredible. Today we talk about developing the capability to transcend pain, fostering the willingness to embrace hardship, why hard work is omnipotent, and how to forge more mental toughness. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS Developing the capability to transcend pain Developing a willingness to embrace the hardship The critical importance of long-term focus How to break those long-term goals into micro goals The dangers of not developing mental toughness How to effectively train the mind Why hard work is omnipotent How to maintain focus in a world of distraction Our obligation as men to be mentally fit Keeping yourself from wasting experiences The power of linear progression RYAN LANGE Ryan Lange reached out a couple months ago and asked to come on the podcast. Honestly, at first thought, I wasn't going to have him on because so many people talk about mental toughness. It's a little like saying you want to talk about leadership. But then, I started looking into what this kid has done. And, I say kid because he's only 20 years old. Now, I realize he's a man (not a child) but I'm absolutely blown away with what he's done already. He's completed 50K's, 50 milers, 100 milers, and at the end of last year completed a 238 mile race in Moab, UT. To give you an idea of what that means, it took roughly 86 hours for him to complete. I'm incredibly inspired by Ryan and his approach to mental toughness. You will be too. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/168 Website: http://orderofman.com

We've all seen the movie, Peter Pan. It's fictional work but it seems that more and more it paints an eerily familiar picture with what we see in the boys who never want to grow up into men. I'll give you a prime example. Just the other day, there was a piece I read about a 30-year old man who had taken his parents to court because his parents were "evicting" him from their house. How pathetic is this? Maybe there's something wrong with this guy (obviously there's something wrong with this guy). But it's amazing that his thought process is to fight so hard to stay at home. I can't help, but there's something seriously wrong with him. But in addition to that, I can't help but think there's something wrong with the parents. How was this guy raised? How was he fathered? When I was done with high school, we went on our senior trip. The day I got home - the very next day - I moved out. It wasn't' because I had anything against my mother but because it was time. It was time to leave the nest. I see so many boys who are more concerned with staying at home than experiencing life. They're more concerned with not having bills and upholding their responsibilities. They're more concerned with Call of Duty or Fortnite (or whatever the game is that they're playing). They're shirking their responsibilities. They don't have jobs. And, their parents are enabling them to actually do this. And we question why we're having problems with our boys turning into men. This is the failure to launch syndrome - the rise of the Peter Pans. The good news is that there are some solutions to this. If you find yourself in a position where you're a boy or a male who wants to grow up but can't figure out how to do it, this article will provide the solution. I see so many men who use the excuse of not having a father figure in their life to justify their lack of performance as men. I can't believe that it needs to be addressed, but it certainly does. So, let's talk about this today. www.orderofman.com/FFN110 Please leave us a rating and review!

All of us have a story. We all have a past. Our prior circumstances define who we are today but do not have to define who we will become moving forward. Too bad most of us never learn to rewrite the script. Today, I am joined by a friend and man who is impacting and influencing millions. His name is Charlie Jabaley and he's someone who walked away from a multi-million dollar business to rewrite his life, lose a massive amount of weight, become an endorsed Nike athlete, and bike across the USA. We talk about what inspired him to make a life-altering change and how he is using positivity to change the world. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS How to turn your struggles into fuel Why "war mode" isn't always the best mode How to realize your childhood dreams How to work smarter, not harder How to rally people around a cause How to use imperfection to inspire others The difference between eating "dead" and eating "alive" Overcoming a negative mindset What it means to train like an 8-year-old Using fun and play as the metric for success How to step away from something secure into the unknown CHARLIE JABALEY I met Charlie several months ago when he and I were podcasting in St. Louis with Andy Frisella on the MFCEO Podcast. He and I immediately hit it off and I was extremely inspired by him, his story, and the positive changes he is making in his life. This man is a Nike endorsed athlete although he doesn't look like your typical athlete. But, it's a testament to who he is, his infectious energy, and how powerful his past, present, and future are. Right now, he's biking across the USA in order to share his story and help others live the life they're meant to live. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/167 Website: http://orderofman.com

Every time we turn around it seems like there's yet another school shooting. And, from what I can see, we're addressing this from a very surface level perspective. This is not about gun control. This is not about gun regulation. In fact, I don't even believe it's fully a gun problem. I think it's a symptom of the problem but not the problem. Obviously, it has to do with the young men who are creating these situations. But more so, we ought to put the responsibility where it truly lies, which is on us as men. I'm going to explain what I mean by that. Bear with me, because I think you're going to agree at the end of this conversation that we've got a real problem with the way that we, as men, are showing up. And the symptom of that is school shootings and some of the other atrocities that we see in society today. Before I get into the details, I do want to say again, this is not meant to be a gun debate but there are a couple of surface level issues that I do want to address first and foremost before we get deeper into this. So, let's begin by addressing how we physically protect our kids when they're at school. There are some very simple solutions to this: www.orderofman.com/FFN109 Please leave us a rating and review!

Today, I talk with John Gilliland about overcoming multiple suicide attempts, rising from the guilt and shame associated with it, using addiction in a positive way, and lifting yourself out of the bottom. Please leave us a rating and review: www.orderofman.com/itunes Visit us at www.orderofman.com

Competition is such a critical component of our journey to develop masculinity and manliness. Too bad it's often viewed as an unnecessary and antiquated way of operating by much of society. Heaven forbid we hold ourselves to a high standard and teach our children to keep score. My guest today, Jake Thompson, Founder of Compete Every Day, makes the case for utilizing healthy competition as a critical factor in improving our lives. Today, we talk about why competition is so important, why executing to failure is so powerful, why losing does not necessarily equal "loser", and why men should compete every day. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS • Why competition is important • How competition creates opportunities and builds capabilities • What separates those who grow with competition and those who self-destruct • How to compete at things that aren't a competition • Why executing to failure is so important • Why losing does not equal "loser" • How to separate yourself from the pack • How to find and develop value in yourself and others • How to teach our children to use healthy competition for growth • Why men are uniquely desirous to keep score and how to use that to our advantage JAKE THOMPSON My guest today is Jake Thompson. Jake and I met last year and an American Dream U event at Fort Sill, Oklahoma. I had the privilege of hearing him speak about the power and importance of competition and new that I wanted to have a deeper discussion with him about the concept. The word, competition, seems to have a negative connotation surrounding it but I think you know as well as I do how powerful competition can actually be. In a world that likes to take it easy and shy away from keeping score, Jake is encouraging more people to do it through his organization, Compete Every Day, and as a speaker, author, and coach. Please leave us a review at http://orderofman.com/itunes Shownotes: http://orderofman.com/166 Website: http://orderofman.com

There is a gap in most men's lives and, in fact, I would argue in every man's life. This gap represents what we know we should be doing versus the things that we're actually doing. This is the integrity gap. The larger that gap is, the less fulfilled, the more unhappy, the more unpleasant, and depressed you will be. The smaller that gap, the more fulfillment, satisfaction, joy, contentment, happiness, wealth, and prosperity will come into your life. There was a time in my life roughly 10 years ago where I had a huge integrity gap in my life (again, the gap between what I knew I should be doing and what I was actually doing). Here's the reality: Everybody that reads this, including you, knows what you should be doing. If I were to ask anyone, "How do you lose weight?" 99.9% of people would say, "Well, I probably ought to eat a little bit better and exercise a little bit more." If I were to ask how to build more wealth in your life, everybody out there would say, "I need to find a way to make more money and/or spend less money." These are not secrets. This is not rocket science here. Everybody knows what they should be doing, yet when you look around in society you can plainly see that many individuals are not living up to their potential. That's the integrity gap. It's knowing what you should be doing, and not doing it. Living with this gap is the most unpleasant, unsatisfying, and miserable time in any person's life. But rather than just tell you that there's this big integrity gap and you need to figure out a way to bridge it (which you certainly do) I want to share with you a very simple formula that will help you bridge the gap. www.orderofman.com/FFN108 Please leave us a rating and review!