Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Jeans Up! We got it all on this one and there's no way you are ready. Dumb hooker math? Yup! Greezy Chuck? Mm-HMM! Seagal nonsense? You know it!What about something that might blow all of our minds and even some of our butts?What about a gas man who really wants it, puts it out there and even TALKS to us about it?Well, just press play because no description can do this episode justice.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tommy trimmed his beard and in doing so lost 40 pounds! Was it all hair or does he have an incurable disease? He thinks he knows and Tina doesn't agree!If you sweat at night you may want to get some blood work done today.Nothing seems quite as ridiculous as a sports fan losing his mind - especially if it's not in YOUR sport. Luckily, we have one of those guys and he has a wonderful accent. We are masters of accents on this show and will prove it. We ALL know about King A** Ripper and his glorious skills - is someone ready to take the throne from him?!?! It appears that a PRINCE is near!Plus we finally put Peter Caine to rest and we top if off with an OMG Maria call for the AGES! Do NOT Kiss her P***y! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you feel something in your shorts and it feels like you should go to the bathroom, you probably should. Thankfully, we have audio of someone who didn't. What about a Dad Jokes Only tour? Would you get tickets? Huh? C'mon, buddy! Multiple choice!! OKAY!!!Should a wipe ALWAYS be clean? We debate as ONE OF US believes that a little something on there is fine. I mean, why use paper AT ALL?!?Dental update: If you're old, be old. Teeth included. Veneers make you look INSANE. Plus a Peter Caine update - he isn't happy with any of us. Is it because we don't own a Raven? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Drink Mountain Dew before bed! A riveting Dental Update from Tom - buckle up you will be shocked. Kamala Devi revelations (our favorite Poly-Bi couple). Safe Haven pooping locations. Christina is getting hit on by black guys now more than ever! Plus a special phone call with a YMH favorite - Peter Caine. Huge episode! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever just done it in a parking lot on the pavement? Were you drunk? We are still Poly and Bi and loving it! Will Tom appreciate Christina's farts this week? The Cincy fart lives on. Tom insists that Christina is flirting with both their post man and a local Whole Foods Employee. A very sad dental update. Lots of mommy mail and a call from Top Dog!! Is it heaven on earth? No, it's just Your Mom's House! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you jerk your meats in public? Only if you work late night at a gas station. But don't do it if you are surrounded by glass. John Cranley update - when will he listen to our demands for a Cincinnatti fart memorial?? Steven Segal revelations, intense fart conversations and football. Have you implemented a thumbs up system in your house yet? I hope so!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh Jeans, Jeans, Jeans - that's not an echo - don't worry, we fixed that! SORRY Sorry sorry.We have a new system in place for bodily noises and acknowledging them - one thumb up top and two for down below. Please join and use our system in your lives.A few weeks back Christina broke down barriers with what has been given the name, The Cincinnati Fart. Please help immortilize her accomplishment by petitioning the Queen City to memorialize this feat. Info on how in the episode. We know a lot of people Style Suck us, but what a certain morning radio recently did just let us know that the Mom's are the talk of the town, Na mean?Lots of good audio in this one. (YEAH!) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you really think American politics are a joke well then maybe you should consider the platform that Deez Nuts is selling. It covers smells, hair and whatever that thing is that what's his name gave you yesterday.Plus, if you thought the Smith children were unbearable before you have no idea the new nonense they are spewing (yeah!). What are the whore giveaways - Voice? Piercings? What about her feet?And dude, listen, you can't pull off that gear if you're not in the Rock 'N Roll Hall Of Fame. Let it go. Chuck Woolery has a NEW endorsement. Is it GREEZY? Not really, but it sure does cost a lot. Can you imagine being married to Steven Seagal. If you can you probably just passed out. We don't wear loose jeans in this one. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever wanted a man goo shampoo? Well now you can hear what that sounds like!DJ Poly-Bi scratches some cool new jams. The jeans discuss car farts, a new movie pitch, relatives sending naked baby pics and tragic news about King Ass Ripper - WARNING - this will make your jeans low and loose.It's ALL HERE! Pull em up! Here we go.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

JEANS ARE ON AGAIN!What's better than a news lady screaming cause of an animal bumping her over? Listening to it on a loop of course!Tommy had a blast in Seattle thanks to Mom's like you. Plus we have a new favorite song, know what I'm sayin? Hell to the naw naw naw.A new movie idea just came to T Bunz, Will ChristJeansa like it? Hope So!The moms really meow down on this one, ENJOY! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices