Teal Swan

I’m going to start this article by just telling it like it is… People suck at relationships. Not that I blame most people for this. Relationships are the central part of life and also the hardest part of life and yet our schools teach us a minimum of 13 years of math and science and geography and history, but nothing about relationships and how to make them work.

For relationships to work, they have to feel good to both people in the relationship. This is true no matter what kind of relationship it is (friendship, partnership, family relationship, work relationship etc). Obviously this is much easier said than done. But one of the top reasons that relationships do not feel good and are unsustainable is: Incompatibility.

When most of us enter into a relationship, we do so because we can’t wait to be near someone. We get butterflies in our stomach. Wild horses couldn’t hold us back from them. We finish all of our other tasks so that we can get to what we really want, which is to just be with them; enjoying their presence and connection. But for some of us, at a certain point in the relationship, something changes. The pattern I am about to expose is a pattern I have seen in some women but it is by far and away most common amongst men. And it is a pattern that is the road to ruin in relationships. It is in fact the single biggest contributor to women deciding to cheat.

There is a little boy. His mom was a stay at home mom and his dad was a lawyer. His parents have decided to get a divorce. They move into different houses. The boy has to go back and forth. Because they got a divorce, the mother had to start working and so the boy is put in daycare. He only sees his dad on weekends.

I have been traveling the world and will continue to do so with the message that it is ok to not be ok. We live in a society that is obsessed with happiness. The message is that if you aren’t feeling happy, something must be terribly wrong with you. But today, we are going to look at another dynamic. We are going to look a barrier to happiness, which is when the only way to be ok is to not be ok.

As a race, human beings are experiencing a huge transition right now in their consciousness. They are going through a ‘hundredth monkey’ experience. The hundredth monkey is essentially a condition where one monkey discovers something new (like a new tool to use) and that monkey teaches it to another and that one teaches it to another until by the hundredth monkey, there is a shift in the entire species and they all are using the new tool. The transition that is taking place within the human consciousness is in the sector of relationships.

Authenticity is a word that you hear flying around spiritual communities and self help gatherings and psychology offices all the time. I myself am leading an authenticity movement. But what does authenticity really mean?

Do you frequently find that you need space to yourself? Do you identify yourself as someone who likes to be alone? The human race is a social species. Our species survival depended (and still does depend) on each other. Technically the top human need is connection and the single biggest threat to our wellbeing is isolation. So how can it be that you need space, how can it be that you need alone time so badly?

An experiential exercise for self awareness.

When it comes to success and happiness, nothing is more important than being ‘in the flow’. We hear ‘being in the flow’ as a buzz word phrase around the world today and it sounds like it would be a good feeling thing, but most of us have no idea what the hell being in the flow actually means. I’m going to clear that up for you today so you know exactly what it means and how to do it.