Thriving In Motherhood Podcast | Productivity, Planning, Family Systems, Time Management, Survival Mode, Mental Health, Vision

In this episode, I talk about where to start when you feel overwhelmed with getting your physical health where you want it to be. We all go through times where we have to have our physical bodies take a backseat and this is my process that I go through every time I re-start my exercise routine. Key Points from this Episode: There are so many reasons (physical & mental) that take us back to square one with our fitness. That's OK! My big why for exercise is the endorphins. I feel better when I exercise. You don't need to do the whole workout that is designed! Start with 10 minutes, then go to 15 minutes until you find the right duration for you. Start with gently building strength (Physique 57), then add cardio (Marcy Upright Exercise Bike). I replaced my standard transportation with a cardio bucket bike. Find what you love to do to work moving into your day. Mow the lawn, swim, longboard, dance in the kitchen. Do what works for you! I gain energy from exercising, not lose it. It feels good to feel strong! Focusing on getting my green smoothie in every day helps teach my body to crave fruits and vegetables again. It helps me get out of the survival-eating mode. Whatever your body needs, feed it that!

Amy is a mother of two and co-founder of Give Her Courage, a company focused on helping young girls develop courage and confidence. We talk about the how and why and modeling that courage for our children. Key Points from this episode: Celebrate the nice things siblings do for each other to encourage the positive behaviors. The things that are worthwhile are going to be hard and challenging, but we shouldn't let that discourage us! Nothing is perfect. Just be in the moment. Try to focus on whatever you are doing in that moment and just be in it. Sitting down for (a distraction-free) dinner as a family every night opens the door for bonding and communication. Embrace your imperfections and let your children see that. Let them see you comfortable in your own skin. That will give them permission to do the same. Risk-taking is doing something where you are stepping outside your comfort zone. It is as individual as we are. Let your children know when you are feeling outside your comfort zone and are choosing to do it anyways. Guilt is just in our nature because we are trying so hard. Confidence is reminding ourselves that we are great and we are doing the best that we can do.

In this episode, I get into some of the logistics of survival mode. A few things to do during survival mode and a few things to do when you're not in survival mode to make survival mode easier. Key Points from this Episode: When we can't get off the couch, we have to adjust our expectations of parenting. We may not be able to control what or when or where the kids eat, but we can focus on the fact that the kids are eating and that is good. We can focus on keeping our one-on-one relationship with our children in a good place rather than worrying about the nitty-gritty of discipline when we can't follow through. When things are good, work hard on routines and rhythms. Then, when things go to survival mode, they take longer to fall apart. If people are fed, a lot of our behavior problems are curbed. So find ways for food to be really easy for you and the kids. Use the tough seasons to teach our children compassion and forgiveness. Survival mode part of this life's journey. Accept and embrace it. Work to over-communicate with your spouse during the hard times. It helps you equally-yolk yourselves. Have hope. Ask your questions in the morning and evening! (See resources) Resources Key Questions to Ask in the Morning - Episode 60 Key Questions to Ask in the Evening - Episode 66

Brandi is a mother of four (ages 4 - 17) who has worked with her husband to build a slow, intentional life with her family. She lives in the hills of central Texas. She shares how God's love for her and her family has guided her in her life and her parenting. Key Points from this episode: It takes different intentional actions to stay connected with our children and hold their hearts who are different ages. Changing our emphasis from behavior to relationships with our children will allow us to maintain that relationship through the teen years and beyond. Try to have eyes to see. Notice when our children are withdrawn and remember that sometimes that is when they need us to press in the most. (Adding food makes the heart-sharing easier for the kids, too!) Schedule in one-on-one time with your kids. Put some to bed early if you need to in order to make it happen. Find time to have time with God. If you can't wake up before the kids, try having 15-20 minutes for all your family to go their separate ways to have their connecting time with God. Have older kids take turns watching younger ones to help make it happen. Pause and think about what you say "yes" to and what you say "no" to in order to grow your intentionality. Then take it to the Lord and follow the direction from Him. Journaling the things you learn from books or hear that inspire you help you absorb the information and also give you something to refer back to when you need a boost. We can make the choice whether we miss the things that happen on social media, or we can miss things that are happening under our own roofs. Saying out loud what we are thankful for can help us find joy in our current moment.

Lauresa is a mother of twin preschoolers and a toddler living in Northwest Arkansas with her husband and two dogs. She grew up in a family of 11 kids and is now a registered dietitian growing her own private practice, a teacher, and an enthusiastic gardener. She is the co-founder of the blog Black Thumb Garden Club and co-author of the Black Thumb Garden Club Workbook. Key Points from this episode: Writing is one of the most important things someone can do to make progress in anything. It helps us find clarity and move forward toward goals. Finding time for creativity in small, consistent ways is a powerful way to make progress. Using projects and Next Actions help you stay focused and make the most of your time. Setting rules for yourself during nap time (like no chores, be physically comfy) can open the doorway for you to utilize that time for creative means, but still feel rejuvenated at the end of nap time. Having or being an example of having skills or contributions outside of motherhood helps others know that it's OK! Committing to a career-focused education does not stop you from also choosing to have a family. Having a family is your choice, but you can look back in the hard times and remember that you chose it! Gardening Tips: 1. Manage your Expectations - recognize that all things have times and seasons 2. Plant it Again - as soon as possible! 3. Prevent Total Devastation - use proactive measures to stop potential issues before they start Best starting point for beginner gardeners: Tomato in a 5 gallon pot Stop and remember God to help maintain balance. Ask "What do you need me to do right now?" even if you're really excited about a new idea. The answer is almost always "people, people, people!"

In this episode, I talk about Key Questions to Ask Yourself in the Evening as a bookend to the questions from Episode 60 where we talked about Key Questions to Ask in the Morning. These questions help me reflect on my day and stay connected to God. They come from top productivity, mindfulness, and spiritual leaders. I invite you to join me on Patreon with these questions and make a habit of this with me! These questions help me feel more in control of my emotions and find hope and joy to live my life more positively.

Erin is a mother of three and one of the world's most sought-after sopranos. She talks about melding these two worlds of motherhood and personal success. Erin believes parenthood is the secret to life bringing a balance to life and an opportunity to care for another. She knows that being a singer is important, but being a parent is even more important than that. She takes her motherhood as a serious responsibility and career in itself. She hopes her children will have more positive memories than negative ones when they look back at their childhoods. She wants them to know and feel how much she cares for them. Erin tries to prioritize family time together despite continuing to travel to perform. One of her goals is to zero in on her children's specific needs and meet those needs as a mother. She talks about how amazing music is in enriching her children's lives and helps her create loving memories singing around the piano. She found it natural to sing to help reach and calm her babies in a way that speaking or physically holding them couldn't. This helped her to realize how much singing should always be part of her life and she shouldn't give it up simply because she became a mother. She talks about mindfulness and not wanting to wish away the negative because then we would need to wish away the good also. It's better to experience both and be aware of the differences so we can enjoy the good moments. Erin is trying to find contentment with living in the moment rather than always looking ahead and wishing our children were in the next phase. Mindfulness is like a code for gratitude; they can't live without one another. Erin describes the different types of sacrifices mothers make for their children, including physical and emotional. Comparing the physical wounds a mother suffers after childbirth to the scars of Christ helped her find meaning in the physical trials of pregnancy and child-bearing. Erin finds the moments when her children are most willing to talk and connect and tries to utilize those moments. She practices a "Sweet, Sour, Service" routine where each member of the family shares something sweet from the day, something sour from the day, and something they did to serve someone that day.

In this episode, I talk about Survival Mode and how that does not need to stop us from thriving even while we are in the midst of it. I share some of my personal life in the middle of full blown survival mode (surgery and recovery, moving, home-buying, etc.) and how the things I've discovered over the past five years adjusted my thinking and got me ready for the things I could prepare for. During this round of struggles, I tried to step away from the worry. I instead asked myself "What is in my circle of influence?" and "What is the next step?" to myself and to God in order to find focus to prep while I was able. I used friends as sounding-boards and got to work on my next actions that were within my circle of influence. I learned to walk away from a project when there was no Next Action and move on to another task - and feel totally fine about that. Recognizing our growth in the moment of struggle disarms fear, frustration, and anger. We instead can celebrate "Look how much we're learning!" Having a little bit of heads up for survival circumstances before we were in the midst of it allowed me to take some responsibility and ask for help when I knew I would need it. Gratitude has provided the power to pull myself out of any pity feelings I might feel for myself in these rough circumstances. Choosing to practice gratitude lets me offer a smile to those around me. Even when I'm "sick mom," I can still help lift spirits and find moments of joy. I'm deciding to be proud of what we have done rather than feeling guilty that I'm not at full functioning levels. Remembering that God's opinion of me is all that really matters has helped me keep perspective on the things that really matter most. Keeping prayer central to my recovery has allowed me to see God in the details of my life. We've already been through a whole lot of hard. We've already learned from a whole lot of hard. We can take the knowledge that we've gained from doing the hard to help us know that we can make it through the next hard. We don't have it all figured out. Hard is still hard. But that's okay. Hard is not wrong. That doesn't mean it's not worth it. If you are not currently in Survival Mode, great! That gives you the chance to look outward and understand how you can better serve others who might be. Prayers and paper products can lift others in ways you cannot imagine. We are all in this trying world together, and together we can help each other thrive!

Kristin is a mother of twin toddlers (1 boy and 1 girl) and host of The Progress Project Podcast. She loves reading, yoga, and baking. She talks about her struggles with infertility which guided her to be the mother she wants to be in finding the balance between being a present mother and doing some work too. Kristin speaks to trusting herself and finding momentum in her successes. Kristin felt a lot of resistance as she dealt with her infertility for five years. As she did that, she was able to come to terms with and really explore what her role could be if she wasn't meant to be a mother yet. Resistance turned into acceptance for her as she journaled and wrote her way through her thought processes. She found herself as she discovered her gifts and desires. She took time to think about the woman she sees herself as in 50 years and used that to help find her purpose. She finds the balance between motherhood and having a career as an ongoing challenge. She wants to be a present mother, but uses her work as a creative outlet and to help her be a person outside of being a mother. Kristin believes balance is the constant readjustment in the pursuit of wholeness. Something that help Kristin stay present in motherhood is not resisting what is.

Emily is a mother of two who seeks for intentional and simple living. She talks about a thought exercise to help her find her legacy and live it now. She talks about getting rid of the mental, emotional, and physical clutter in her life. She talks about the morning routine she has recently implemented (since getting to sleep through the night!) and how that has opened her mind to be able to focus. She asks herself "Am I present? Am I joyful? Am I calm?" and uses that mantra as a check for herself throughout her day. She journals in her 5 Minute Journal to focus herself on gratitude and a low-tech start to the day. Emily also uses her "Hello Emily Morning Routine" to help set her tone for the entire day. Emily's struggles with Unexplained Infertility started to define her motherhood journey by helping her to realize that she was not in control of everything no matter how hard she worked. She learned that what she can control was how she reacts to difficulties and that simplifying her life was an absolute essential part to keep her mentally and emotionally healthy. She talks about the ongoing process of finding peace with struggles and accepting that "God is God and I am not." Emily explains about how we don't like to act different than our identity, which sometimes requires us to adjust the concept of our own identity to what God has in store for us. Reminding ourselves of the identity we have (or want to have) can help us to remain present, joyful, and calm. Emily embraces minimalist in the definition that involved removing the things that distract from your purpose. She analyzes her physical items, calendar items, and mental self-talk to try to weed out what isn't serving her goals. She teaches the importance of detaching from our own thoughts and observing them from a kind bystander perspective. Emily explains her experience with beginning to meditate, just focused on breathing. She uses breathing as a reset and transition between activities and emotions and anchoring practice in her day. Success, to Emily, is knowing what she wants to accomplish in her day that are truly important (not to-dos) that allows her to be present and involved with her children. She is trying to take a step back and not worry about documenting every moment, but experience it instead. She also considers success modeling the behaviors she wants her children to value. When she focuses on what her "why" is, it brings everything else greater clarity. Emily imagines talking with her son about him asking "What did you do with your time when you weren't taking care of us?" She uses that question to help create her legacy that she wants to leave to her children, not of tangible things, but the results of her daily actions. She wants to leave more than the memory of scrolling through social media and doesn't want the excuse of being too tired to stop her from achieving her goals and dreams. Emily teaches that her legacy also reflects back to her identity and values. Emily has mastered being "Mamadexterous" which is the the ability to do a lot of things with your non-dominate hand while holding a baby on your hip. She is working on approaching new phases and skills of her children with wonder and excitement rather than dread.