The Meaning of Men

Why are men still dying by suicide at such alarming rates? This week on The Meaning of Men we unpack the male suicide crisis and what’s really driving it with Dr Susie Bennett, one of the UK's leading researchers in this space. We explore the complex intersection of masculinity, mental health, loneliness, and emotional suppression—and why so many men feel unable to ask for help. Drawing on cutting-edge research and lived experience, this conversation goes beyond statistics to reveal the deeper psychological and cultural factors behind male suicide. From the “empathy gap” to the pressure to be strong, successful, and self-reliant, we examine how societal expectations can leave men feeling isolated, ashamed, and disconnected. Crucially, this episode also focuses on solutions. You’ll hear why connection, community, and redefining what it means to be a man are essential to preventing male suicide—and how we can all play a role in supporting the men in our lives. In this episode you will learn: What’s really driving male suicide rates The impact of loneliness and social disconnection How masculinity norms affect men’s mental health Why men struggle to open up and seek support Practical ways to better support the men in your life Hear more from Dr Susie: Website:malesuicideresearch.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/male_suicide_research/ Timestamps: 07:22: The State of Male Suicide: Trends and Concerns 12:43: The Empathy Gap: Societal Perceptions of Men 18:54: Cultural Factors Influencing Male Suicide 29:46: The Psychological Impact of Masculinity on Men 33:08: The Tenderness of Providing 35:19: Redefining the Role of Provider 37:33: The Crisis of Male Loneliness 41:01: Building Connections Among Men 45:03: Diverse Interventions for Male Mental Health 52:04: Recognizing Warning Signs of Distress 01:04: 16Hope for the Future of Boys and Men  

Could your brain be holding answers you’ve never accessed? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I'm joined by clinical and sports psychologist Santiago Brand to explore brain mapping, neuroscience, and personalised mental health. We dive into how brain mapping (qEEG) reveals the root causes of anxiety, depression, burnout, and focus issues—moving beyond guesswork toward precision mental health. Santiago explains how understanding your brain activity can help tailor therapy, medication, and performance strategies to the individual. This conversation also explores proactive mental health, showing why men often wait until crisis point—and how tools like neurofeedback, breathwork, and lifestyle changes can improve brain function, emotional regulation, and resilience. If you’re looking to optimise performance, better understand your mental health, or reduce overwhelm, this episode offers practical insights grounded in neuroscience. In this episode you will learn: What brain mapping is and how it works How it identifies root causes of mental health challenges Why personalised treatment improves outcomes The role of neurofeedback and brain training Practical ways to support brain health daily   Hear more from Santiago: Website: https://www.santiagobrand.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/santiago-brand-a985905/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/neurosantiago/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/Santiago-Brand-61555834522930/   Timestamps:   04:39: The Journey into Brain Science and Neurofeedback 08:42: The Importance of Brain Mapping in Mental Health 12:48: Preventative Measures and Early Interventions 20:35: Empowerment Through Understanding Brain Function 24:10: Holistic Approaches to Brain Health 30:23: Training the Brain for Better Performance 36:19: Precision in Mental Health Interventions

What if being an introvert isn’t a limitation—but simply a label you’ve learned to live with? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I down with Nick Shelton, author of An Introvert's Guide to World Domination, to explore confidence, introversion, and the powerful role identity plays in shaping our lives. Nick shares his story of growing up shy and socially awkward, often feeling misunderstood at school and unsure how to navigate social situations. Instead of accepting those labels, he began observing confident people and breaking down their behaviours into simple, learnable steps. Drawing on lessons from his time in the Air Force, Nick explains how complex personal challenges—like social anxiety or low confidence—can be tackled through small, deliberate actions. This conversation explores how many men become defined by personality labels such as “introvert,” and how questioning those assumptions can unlock new possibilities for personal growth, connection, and resilience. If you’ve ever felt held back by shyness, social anxiety, or the belief that confidence simply isn’t “who you are,” this episode offers a refreshing perspective—and practical tools to start changing the story. In this episode you will learn: Why personality labels like “introvert” can limit personal growth How to build confidence through small, practical steps The power of observing and modelling confident behaviour Lessons from military training that apply to everyday life How to challenge the identity stories holding you back Hear more from Nick: Book: An Introvert's Guide to World Domination: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Introverts-Guide-World-Domination-Networker-ebook/dp/B08GDV7B4B/ref=sr_1_1?crid=KMAPPT6T12V0&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.IlGRyZIC2be9dgzVPV9i0c8Ph78cAJlcQa9JkLyjJr8._vDJArjgc68QswSwwL8Ri0GUx5BKVLM2RJ4a3wREFuw&dib_tag=se&keywords=the+introverts+guide+to+world+domination&qid=1773248876&s=digital-text&sprefix=the+introverts+guide+to+world+dominatio%2Cdigital-text%2C222&sr=1-1 https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicholasleonshelton/   https://nicksheltonspeaks.com/   Timestamps: 04:07: Understanding Introversion: A New Perspective 05:50: The Power of Observation 10:08: Building Authentic Connections 10:57: An Introvert's Guide to World Domination 14:43: Leveraging Strengths for Success 15:12: Navigating High-End Events 17:27: Networking as a Skill 19:34: Building Networking Muscles 24:46: Overcoming Introversion in Social Settings 29:35: The Power of Public Speaking 34:45: Daily Habits for Relationship Building 40:38: Empowering Introverts in Early Life

What if starting to treat depression was as simple as putting on a headset at home? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, we're exploring the groundbreaking wearable technology backed by the NHS that’s transforming depression treatment. Joining me is Kultar Garcha, a GP and chief medical officer at Flow Neuroscience, the team behind a wearable headset designed to treat depression safely from home. We unpack the science behind its success, where this fits alongside therapy and medication, and why it’s especially appealing for men tackling depression. If you're searching for alternatives to antidepressants, innovative depression treatments, or ways to support men’s mental health, this conversation is essential listening. In this episode you will learn: How Flow headset uses brain stimulation to help treat depression at home Why the headset is especially appealing to men battling depression How it works to support therapy and other interventions for depression Hear more from Flow Neuroscience: https://www.flowneuroscience.com/   Timestamps: 02:08: Understanding Flow Neuroscience 03:40: The Technology of the Headset 06:08: Neuromodulation and Neuroplasticity Explained 08:38: Men's Mental Health and the Appeal of Tech 12:47: Flow in Relation to Traditional Treatments 16:49: Scientific Evidence and Effectiveness of Flow 20:13: User Experience and Feedback 24:12: Meeting People Where They Are 27:33: Future Directions for Flow Neuroscience  

How can men start getting the most from therapy? In this episode of The Meaning of Men I'm joined by Chris Hemmings. Chris is a former BBC journalist whose own struggles with grief, addiction and depression led him to retrain as a psychotherapist and build Men’s Therapy Hub — a platform connecting men with male therapists across the UK. Chris explains that many men aren’t avoiding therapy because they don’t care — but because they fear judgment, being seem as weak, or being told they need to become someone they’re not. Together we start to explore some of these myths, what men really need from their therapists and how they can best show up to get the most from therapy.  In this episode you will learn: Why men often avoid therapy and how to overcome the stigma The biggest misconceptions about counselling for men How masculinity and emotional strength can work together What to look for when choosing the right therapist Why seeking help is an act of courage, not weakness Hear more from Chris: Men's Therapy Hub: www.menstherapyhub.co.uk   No Man's an Island podcast:  Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5QgINHeUZKorBCE4LBoBXF Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/dk/podcast/no-mans-an-island/id1849171262?i=1000745844084   My website: www.chrishemmings.co.uk   Timestamps: 09:27: Misconceptions About Therapy 18:36: Finding the Right Therapist 23:47: The Importance of Gut Feel in Therapy 24:40: Investment Mindset in Therapy 25:45: Shifting from 'Should' to 'Could' in Therapy 28:45: Normalizing Emotions and Removing Shame 31:37: The Role of Humor in Therapy 36:07: Understanding Worthiness in Therapy 40:49: Approaching Therapy with Courage 45:58: Demystifying Therapy for Men  

What do boys and young men actually need from us right now? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Lorraine Candy — journalist, editor and bestselling author — to explore what boys really need in today’s digital, headline-driven culture. From emotional regulation and developmental vulnerability to social media, gaming and the “toxic masculinity” narrative, this conversation cuts through the panic and brings clarity to modern parenting. Lorraine explains why boys often lag behind girls emotionally, how media messaging distorts expectations, and why blanket bans on technology rarely solve the real problem. We explore practical tools for raising emotionally healthy boys: setting boundaries with clear consequences, building connection through rituals, repairing ruptures after conflict, and meeting boys where they are — not where we think they should be. If you’re parenting a son — whether he’s five or fifteen — and wondering if you’re getting it right, this episode offers grounded insight, reassurance and practical strategies to help boys grow into confident, compassionate and resilient men. In this episode you will learn: Why boys develop differently — and what that means for parenting How media narratives shape fear around masculinity Why connection beats control when setting boundaries How to talk to boys about technology and influencers The power of repair in strengthening your relationship Disclaimer: Lorraine's advice is not specifically for anyone parenting neurodivergent teens or children with SEN.  Hear more from Lorraine:  Substack parenting newsletter: https://open.substack.com/pub/lorrainecandy Lorraine's book: https://harpercollins.co.uk/products/mum-whats-wrong-with-you-101-things-only-mothers-of-teenage-girls-know-lorraine-candy   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/CqkuOJeI01m/?igsh=MXB5N3d1ZzV5ZnFieg==   Timestamps: 04:05: Understanding Boys: Vulnerability and Development 06:42: The Impact of Media on Parenting Expectations 09:54: Emotional Development and Communication with Boys 12:46: The Role of Technology in Boys' Lives 15:54: Recognizing Behavioral Changes in Adolescents 18:36: Building Connections Through Rituals 21:45: Critical Thinking in Parenting: Media Influence 24:35: The Importance of Open Conversations About Emotions 33:06: Navigating the Impact of Social Media on Boys 34:45: Setting Healthy Boundaries for Teenage Boys 39:02: The Importance of Communication and Connection 41:58: Understanding Emotional Regulation in Boys 45:35: Maintaining Connections During Adolescence 50:04: Redefining Masculinity and Role Models 53:49: Reassurance for Parents Raising Boy

Why are Black men in America living 13 years less than their healthiest counterparts? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Professor Derek M. Griffith, leading public health researcher and global expert on Black men’s health, to unpack the crisis hiding in plain sight. From life expectancy gaps and suicide rates to structural racism, economic inequality and the commercial determinants of health, this conversation explores why Black men’s health outcomes remain among the worst in the United States — and what can be done about it. Professor Griffith explains why he prefers the term manhood over masculinity, how identity and societal expectations shape behaviour, and why men’s health is too often framed as an individual failure rather than a policy priority. If you care about men’s mental health, health equity, masculinity, fatherhood, purpose, resilience, and social justice — this episode is essential listening. In this episode you will learn: Why the 13-year life expectancy gap for Black men exists How structural racism impacts physical and mental health The difference between masculinity and manhood — and why it matters Why men’s health is overlooked in public policy Practical policy shifts that could transform outcomes for Black men Hear more from Derek: https://prmh.nursing.upenn.edu/ Timestamps: 03:11: The Journey to Addressing Men's Health 05:45: The State of Black Men's Health 10:49: Historical Context of Manhood and Masculinity 16:01: The Role of Provider in Black Communities 20:59: Defining Manhood vs. Masculinity 25:56: The Visibility of Men's Health Issues 30:58: Policy Changes for Men's Health 36:04: Hope for the Future of Men's Health        

What do you do when staying where you are feels safer—but moving forward is the only way to survive? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I'm joined by Marine Corps veteran Jeremy Stalnecker to explore the life-defining philosophy of March or Die. Drawing from Jeremy’s combat experience in Iraq and his work supporting veterans, first responders, and men in crisis, this conversation goes deep into identity, trauma, resilience, and responsibility. We unpack what happens when men tie their sense of self to a role, a past version of themselves, or a traumatic experience—and how that can quietly destroy relationships, purpose, and hope. Jeremy shares why victimhood can feel comforting, why doing nothing is often the most dangerous choice, and how true resilience is built before crisis hits. This episode is essential listening for men navigating transition, burnout, loss, or the quiet feeling of just existing rather than truly living. In this episode you will learn: Why “marching” is a daily decision, not a one-time breakthrough How identity loss fuels anger, isolation, and hopelessness The hidden comfort of staying stuck—and how to break free Why responsibility is the gateway to freedom How men can move forward even when the future feels unclear Hear more from Jeremy: Jeremy’s social media: https://www.facebook.com/jeremystalneckerofficial https://www.instagram.com/jeremystalnecker/ https://x.com/jstalnecker https://www.youtube.com/@MightyOaksFoundation https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeremy-stalnecker-63a2a17/   Jeremy’s website: https://www.jeremystalnecker.com/   Timestamps: 03:47: The Journey from Military to Ministry 06:35: Reconnecting with Identity and Purpose 09:43: The Work of Mighty Oaks Foundation 12:46: March or Die: A Military Philosophy 15:35: Choosing to Move Forward 18:34: The Power of Decision-Making 21:32: Victim Mentality vs. Survivor Mindset 24:22: Identity and Trauma 27:28: The Challenge of Defining Masculinity 30:19: Understanding Trauma and Identity 36:17: The Importance of Preparation for Adversity 42:08: Navigating Change and Decision-Making 45:35: Finding Hope and Purpose in Life

What is misogyny really all about, and why do rigid ideas of masculinity harm boys and make them vulnerable to radical narratives? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I'm joined by Cynthia Miller-Idriss, one of the world’s leading experts on extremism, gender, and online radicalisation, to explore the deeper meaning of misogyny and why it matters for men’s mental health, belonging, and purpose. Together, we unpack how misogyny often lays the cultural groundwork for extremist beliefs, hate-fuelled violence, and rigid models of masculinity that leave boys and men isolated, angry, and vulnerable. This conversation goes beyond blame, asking harder questions about loneliness, grievance-based online content, the influence of algorithms, and why so many men are searching for meaning in unhealthy places. In this episode you will learn: How misogyny becomes a gateway to extremism and mass violence The hidden damage rigid masculinity does to boys — and why it fuels radicalisation How influencers, algorithms, and grievance culture pull men down dark paths Why loneliness and lost purpose leave men vulnerable — and what actually protects them What “calling men in” really looks like, and how to build healthier paths to meaning Hear more from Cynthia: Book: Man Up - The New Misogyny and the Rise of Violent Extremism: https://press.princeton.edu/books/hardcover/9780691257549/man-up   Timestamps: 00:59: Cynthia's Journey and Academic Background 04:31: Understanding Misogyny and Its Broader Implications 08:46: The Link Between Misogyny and Extremism 12:04: Exploring Influencers and Their Impact on Men 16:39: The Man Box: Conditioning and Its Consequences 23:07: Finding Healthier Forms of Belonging 28:28: The Importance of Meaning and Purpose for Men 33:56: Hope for the Future: Engaging Conversations and Solutions

Why are men so often discouraged from caregiving roles? In this episode of The Meaning of Men, I sit down with Joss Cambridge Simmons (aka Jossy Care), a male nanny and caregiver who is redefining what it means to be a man in today’s world. Together, we explore the rarely discussed role of male nannies, the stigma men face in caregiving roles, and why love, presence, and emotional safety are not weaknesses, but essential human strengths. Joss shares his personal journey into childcare, how caregiving shaped his understanding of masculinity, and what children, families, and society gain when men show up with softness and intention. This conversation goes far beyond childcare — touching on fatherhood beyond biology, purpose-driven work, resilience in the face of judgement, and the importance of positive male role models in children’s lives. Whether you’re a father, a caregiver, or a man questioning traditional expectations and masculinity, this episode offers insight, challenge, and inspiration for living with deeper meaning. In this episode you will learn: Why caregiving is a powerful expression of masculinity How male nannies challenge outdated gender norms The impact emotionally present men have on children How love and softness build resilience in men Why purpose often lies beyond society’s expectations Hear more from Joss: www.instagram.com/jossycare   Here Is An App That Can Support Families' Busy Schedules: "TRYBE"  Subscribe Monthly Or Yearly   Watch  Me On CBBCS "Our School" Our School   Watch the Nanny Man Documentary  Nanny Man   Watch My Recent Interview Here, Manny Life   Watch Me At the National Diversity Awards 2019   Become An Inclusive Anti-Racist Educator / Parent & Adult Anti Racist Guide   Timestamps:   01:50: Becoming a Male Nanny: A Unique Path 05:09: Challenging Misconceptions of Men in Caregiving 10:07: Demand for Male Nannies and Societal Shifts 18:20: Redefining Masculinity 23:13: The Role of Love in Personal Growth 29:47: Navigating Parenting Challenges 35:22: Creating Safety Over Discipline 40:14: Encouraging Male Involvement in Childcare