The Leader's Journey Podcast

They explore how the phrasing, tone, and timing of questions shape responses and relationships. The difference between genuine curiosity and control in questioning comes up. Practical practices are discussed, like asking three questions before advising and using divergent versus convergent questions. They highlight thinking versus feeling questions and simple, perspective-shifting 'magic' questions.

Mac McCarthy, a pastoral leader who coaches church teams in emotional maturity and difficult conversations, joins to unpack what to do when talk runs out. He outlines two common traps in group dialogue. Short, practical scenes cover deciding who decides, staying connected amid disagreement, and building processes that move groups forward without sacrificing relationship.

Rick Rarick, leadership coach and former HR and management development exec at Levi Strauss, Coca-Cola and others. He talks about communication as an ongoing cultural practice, why front-line supervisors shape how messages travel, and how listening, check-ins, and synchronous conversations prevent distortion and build trust during change.

We communicate every day, yet we rarely stop to think about what we are actually doing when we enter a conversation. In this episode, Trisha and Elissa explore the basics of communication through a simple but powerful metaphor: conversation as a game of catch. What does it mean to throw well? To catch well? To take turns? To play generously? Together they unpack how conversations flow, how they break down, and how we can become more mindful, generous participants in the everyday exchanges that shape our relationships at work, at home, and in our communities. Conversation Overview Conversation as a game of catch Throwing and catching: sending and receiving skills Interrupting, over-talking, and holding the ball Asking good questions and keeping the game moving Generosity, anxiety, and when catch turns into dodgeball Staying in the game instead of taking the ball home Guest Bio Elissa Lappenga is a professional educator, trainer, and coach with over 20 years of experience in education, non-profit, corporate, and community settings. Elissa earned her Master of Education (M.Ed.) from UCLA with a concentration in counseling and was one of the first facilitators of the university's Intergroup Dialogue program. She also maintains a SHRM-CP certification with the Society for Human Resources Management and is a PROSCI certified change management practitioner. Resources and References Mentioned Elissa on The Leaders Journey Register for the Upcoming Zoom: How to Have a Converstation

Jim Herrington, longtime leadership coach who blends systems thinking with spiritual formation. He reflects on leadership as lifelong learning. He discusses how personal pain, trauma, and curiosity shaped his approach. He explores systems change, staying curious into later life, and the importance of self-knowledge for leaders.

In this engaging discussion, Megan Mills, an improvisational theatre expert and advocate, shares insights on how improv can revolutionize leadership. They explore the power of the 'yes, and' mindset for collaboration, highlighting its importance in building trust and adaptability. Megan emphasizes creating safety and shared agreements within teams to foster a supportive environment. With practical tools like listening games and the Three-Headed Expert game, she illustrates how improvisation can enhance communication and collaboration in unpredictable situations.

Explore the bittersweet nature of nostalgia and its impact on leadership within faith communities. Discover how longing for the past can hinder growth while providing emotional comfort. The hosts dive into the connection between nostalgia and grief, using biblical insights to highlight the importance of moving forward. Learn strategies for preserving the essence of cherished practices while adapting to change. From intergenerational dynamics to practical rituals for grieving, this conversation encourages a healthy relationship with both past and future.

Ken Eriks and Chelsey Harmon from Churches Learning Change bring insights on the transformative power of mental models in congregations. They discuss how these unseen frameworks shape behaviors and beliefs within church communities. Through engaging stories, they outline strategies for surfacing and reforming mental models to foster creative and adaptive change. The conversation emphasizes the importance of patience, reflection, and experimentation in this vital process, ultimately guiding congregations toward a clearer path in their mission.

Mac McCarthy, a pastor and coach known for integrating emotional maturity into leadership, shares compelling insights on emotional intelligence and its vital role in spiritual formation. He emphasizes Jesus as the ultimate model of emotional maturity and offers practical approaches for leaders to embody these principles. The conversation touches on the importance of creating a culture that nurtures emotional growth, navigating conflicts with maturity, and embracing patience in the long journey of development. Mac also encourages self-compassion for leaders as they cultivate this essential skill.

In this episode of The Leader's Journey Podcast, Trisha Taylor and Michael DeRuyter explore empathy as a guiding principle for leaders. Is empathy always a strength, or can it sometimes get in the way? Through stories, humor, and systems thinking, they unpack what empathy really is, why it is often misunderstood, and how mature empathy helps us stay grounded, connected, and responsible. This conversation invites leaders to move beyond reactive compassion toward empathy that sustains courage, clarity, and truth. Conversation Overview Redefining Empathy Empathy, Sympathy, and Emotional Fusion The Role of Perspective and Curiosity Empathy and Systems Thinking Boundaries, Responsibility, and Courage Resources Mentioned A Failure of Nerve by Edwin H. Friedman Dare to Lead by Brené Brown Empathy Zoom Dialogue – October 21