The Sexual Wellness Sessions

Kicking off series three is a conversation with the absolutely brilliant Eleanor Tattersfield @marbyandelm who has been collecting the UK’s sex secrets. Anonymously sent to her on postcards this collection of cards are absolutely stunning, and they really do have a story to tell in terms of what’s going on in our sex lives and how we think and feel about sex.   I talk to Eleanor about how I think the postcards are a form of sex education; and are opening up our narratives about what we find erotic, desirable, pleasurable and what turns us on. The series also breaks down the idea that there are limited ways that we can express ourselves sexually, and encourages us to think about our definitions and ideas about sex.    •••   Marby & Elm is a little stationery shop on Exmouth Market in Clerkenwell. After the success of Lockdown Secrets ( https://www.marbyandelm.com/store/products,lockdown-secrets-book_647.htm ) Eleanor decided to launch the series Sex Secrets in a hope to prove that in fact we all pretty much share them and are far from alone.   Instagram @marbyandelm https://www.instagram.com/marbyandelm TikTok @marby_and_elm   •••   This episode is sponsored by iPlaySafe, the new app that is removing the 'ick' from sharing STI test results with potential partners.  Download the free medically-approved app to order your home STI testing kit. Your result will be sent directly to your app verifying your sexual health status, it's then up to you when, with whom, and whether you share it.  The free app also gives you access to articles, podcasts and sexual education content. Join the iPlaySafe community today!    https://www.iplaysafe.app/ Instagram  @iplaysafeapp   •••   The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist. Kate believes that so much of what needs normalising when it comes to sex and relationships can be changed through conversation; and this is why the podcast is focused around the idea of hosting informal but informative conversations.   Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this final episode of the second series of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're discussing the future of sex. My guest Bryony Cole and I talk about the biggest changes and trends that we have seen impacting our sex lives recently, and where we think the future of sex is heading.   Undoubtably there has been an enormous shift in our sex lives and accessibility to information since the dawn of the internet; and we see that smart phones in particular have played a huge part in changing how we find and meet partners, stay in relationships, and break up. In our conversation Bryony and I talk about the pros and cons of the impact of tech on our lives, the changes to sexual healthcare and solutions; and how sex tech, trends and developments can not just change how we have sex now, but can influence narratives, messages and education going forward.    Bryony Cole is the world's leading authority on sextech, and she's fascinated by the way technology permeates every corner of our lives, even the most intimate ones. She is the creator and host of the Future of Sex podcast, founder of Sextech School and Lovehoney's resident sextech advisor. Since launching the top-rated podcast Future of Sex, Bryony has been on stages across the world forecasting trends in the sextech industry for governments, tech titans and entertainment companies, including SXSW, PEN World Voices Festival, Skolkovo Foundation and Founders Forum. Bryony recently launched Sextech School, a course for entrepreneurs looking to get started in sextech. This episode was brought to you by Lelo the luxury sex toy brand combining luxury, pleasure and innovation to create sex toys for both solo and couple pleasure; and I am very proud to work with Lelo as their UK Sex Expert, and you can use the code KMLELO15 until the end of 2021 to get 15% off your order at https://www.lelo.com/    @lelo_official Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're discussing the topic of sexual trauma and the impact that it can have on someone's life. My guest Silva Neves is a Psychotherapist specialising in Trauma, EMDR, and Psychosexual and Relationship Therapy; and he has an enormous amount of experience working with those who have been through trauma and sexual trauma experiences.    In our discussion we talk through how trauma and sexual trauma are defined, common ways that it can manifest whilst acknowledging that everyone is different, and ways in which people can start to move through and process what has happened to them and the aftermath. With a focus on sex lives and relationships Silva discusses how couples can manage if one or both partners have experienced sexual trauma, how to communicate about triggers and ways of managing situations and boundaries; and working together to build trust, intimacy and a sex life and relationship that works for them.    Silva Neves is a COSRT-accredited and UKCP-registered psychotherapist and supervisor, author, and provider of clinical trainings internationally on the topics of sex, relationships, trauma and grief. For 11 years he has specialised in psychosexual & relationship therapy, couples therapy and the treatment of compulsive sexual behaviours. He is also a trauma psychotherapist experienced in working with survivors of sexual abuse, sexual trauma, sexual and romantic affairs, and compulsive sexual behaviours. Silva is the author of Compulsive Sexual Behaviours, A Psycho-Sexual Treatment Guide for Clinicians (2021, Routledge) and he featured in the BBC programme Sex On The Couch.   @silvanevespsychotherapy   https://www.silvaneves.co.uk/   www.sexpositivityUK.com   Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/   @blueheart_app Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're talking about motherhood, and how being a mother can create impact and change in our sex lives. We discuss all of the factors that are influencing the lives of modern mothers, and how a snowballing of social factors are directly impacting mothers and their relationships with self and partners.    In our conversation Sarah and I cover how mothers go through stages and changes physically, emotionally, psychologically and in terms of identity, all of which can create a huge shift in how we see ourselves as a person; which can then show up in our sex lives and relationships. Sarah refers to this as matrescence, which is defined as the process of becoming a mother and the changes that occur in different aspects of our lives as a result, and she talks about how this is reflected back to us by society and culture.    Sarah Forbes is a curator + sexual culturalist + author. Dubbed a "sexpert supreme" by Cosmopolitan Magazine, her memoir, "Sex in the Museum" is based on her decade as the Curator of the Museum of Sex in New York. Trained as an anthropologist, Sarah is writing her second book, "Mama Sex," an anthropological look at motherhood and sexuality. With a focus on sexuality, gender and history, Sarah has been a featured expert everywhere from the New York Times to the The Today Show.    @mamasexbook   https://www.mamasexbook.com/   Today's episode was brought to you by Ferly, the sexual wellness app empowering womxn and non-binary folk to overcome sexual difficulties which can range from lack of libido, inability to orgasm or simply low body confidence. Ferly do this with science based tools and techniques, that help them feel better in their bodies and their beds. The app is available on iOS and Android. Download it today and start your journey to a healthier, confident and more pleasurable life. I have the privilege of working with Ferly as their resident advisor, and truly believe their app has the ability to be transformative for female sexual wellness. https://weareferly.com/   @weareferly Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're talking about Chemsex with a particular focus on the gay, bisexual and men-having-sex-with-men community where chemsex is most common. My guest for this conversation is David Stuart who was the first person to name and identify Chemsex as an emerging gay cultural phenomenon. He's a support worker, public servant and a drug use counsellor, specialising in chems and chemsex. He is incredibly experienced in working with those struggling with chemsex use, and what factors are often involved in starting and maintaining the use chems as a part of someone's sex life.    One of the challenges of chemsex is that people often describe this particular use of drugs, as making them feel less inhibited and experiencing increased pleasure; however the flipside of this is that is can pose challenges for sober sex. In this conversation we unpack some of the cultural and social factors that are contributing to people's challenges with chemsex; and we examine some of the narratives and experiences that can influence someone's relationship to chems.    David Stuart was the first to name and identify Chemsex as an emerging gay cultural phenomenon. He developed the world’s first chemsex support services, and he fought relentlessly for greater chemsex awareness by encouraging and stimulating cultural dialogue and discussion within our international gay, bi and Queer communities. He continues to support international governments and communities to manage the cultural phenomenon from a place of kindness, sex positivity and cultural competence. https://www.davidstuart.org/   @davidastuart   Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/   @blueheart_app   Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're discussing the experience of menopause with icon of the nineties Brit Pop scene, and now menopause campaigner, author and columnist and founder of Women's Health Platform Meg's Menopause @megsmenopause Meg Mathews.   Whilst the menopause is a natural part of ageing which occurs when oestrogen levels decline, normally between the ages of about 45 and 55 years of age; there are still 34 commonly associated symptoms which impact those going through menopause not jut physically and physiologically, but also emotionally and mentally. Whilst some symptoms like irregular periods, hot flushes, vaginal dryness and lower libido may be more commonly known; others such as fatigue, joint pain, dizzy spells, impact on sleep, anxiety and loss of focus and struggles with cognition can have a huge impact on all round health and wellbeing. All of this can also have a huge knock on effect on relationships, work, family-life, hobbies and interests and general wellbeing; although it feels like there aren't many conversations acknowledging that.   In 2016 Meg turned fifty and began to experience the first symptoms of the menopause. She was shocked at the lack of support and understanding shown to women during this time in their lives and made it her mission to break the stigma around this natural cycle of ageing. Since 2017 she has been campaigning about the menopause, fronting campaigns, speaking at events and helping thousands of women navigate their menopause journey.    Meg launched the Women's Health Platform @Megsmenopause to offer people holistic information and products, she has a weekly column for Stella magazine dedicated to the menopause, and a quarterly column in Menopause Matters magazine.    Meg’s first book ‘The New Hot: Taking on the Menopause with Attitude and Style’ was published by Vermillion in 2020. https://megsmenopause.com/ Instagram : @megsmenopause Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/   @blueheart_app   Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this engaging discussion, Justin Hancock, a seasoned relationships and sex educator, tackles the complex topic of consent. He emphasizes the need for comprehensive conversations that break down societal misconceptions. Justin critiques traditional sexual education, advocating for resources that genuinely address consent. He highlights the importance of open dialogue, linking consent to personal agency and everyday choices. Listeners will walk away with a deeper understanding of how to normalize discussions around consent in their relationships and communities.

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're discussing how the process of grieving and loss can impact sex lives and relationships. I'll be having this conversation with the world leading expert, psychotherapist, and author Julia Samuel MBE; who in her book Grief Works said “We seem happy to talk about sex or failure, or to expose our deepest vulnerabilities, but on death we are silent. It is so frightening, even alien, for many of us that we cannot find the words to voice it . . . The pain we feel is invisible, an unseen wound.” Grief and loss are not often held in conversation together with sex, but as a psychotherapist it's something that I often explore in the therapy room. Loss can shake up so much of our lives, change our thinking and our perspectives; and something that Julia often refers to in our conversation is we can't 'not know that loss is possible' once we have experienced it. We discuss the flip side of love being loss, and how for some people their most natural instinct may be to shut down and turn away from intimacy and connection; whereas for others the need to feel, and feel alive may be what they are searching for when they are grieving. We also talk about how we understand mourning, and if we can apply what we know about loss to relationship break ups. Julia Samuel MBE. Msc,  MBACP (Snr Accredited) UKCP Registered Psychotherapist  Julia is a leading UK psychotherapist.  At St Mary's Hospital Paddington, she established the post of  psychotherapist for Paediatrics, where her role for 25 years involved seeing families who have children or babies who die, and where she trained and supported the staff. In 1994 she worked to help launch and establish The Child Bereavement UK, and in 2016 was awarded an MBE in recognition of her services to bereaved children; and in 2017 Middlesex University awarded her an Honorary Doctorate.  In 2017 Julia published Grief Works which was a Sunday Times bestseller in the UK and has been published in 17 countries. In March 2020 she published This Too Shall Pass: stories of Change Crisis and Hopeful Beginnings and is also a Sunday Times bestseller. She also hosts the podcast A Living Loss : The Art Of Losing And Finding Yourself. https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram : @juliasamuelmbe Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/ @blueheart_app Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're discussing the huge topic of relationships. We cover how sex can change in relationships and how one of the biggest challenges to our relationships can be our narratives and expectations of them. My guest for this conversation is the brilliant Andrew G Marshall; marital therapist, podcast host and author of twenty books on sex and relationships; including the international best sellers: 'I love you but I'm not in love with you' and 'How can I ever trust you again'. Relationships are a theme woven through most of the episodes on this podcast, and it almost feels impossible not to talk about relationships when we talk about sex, and not to talk about sex when we talk about relationships. The biggest questions I get asked as a Psychosexual Therapist are about how and why sex changes, and this is what Andrew and I unpick in our discussion. We talk about where our ideas about relationships come from, why our expectations can set us up to fail, why intimacy and fear can be linked, and why often the hardest thing to do is to let go of control and be vulnerable, but how when we do how it can deepen intimacy and connection. Andrew G Marshall is a marital therapist, author of twenty books, and host of the podcast: The Meaningful Life with Andrew G Marshall - where he interviews guests from all walks of life about what makes life meaningful. He trained thirty five years ago with Relate and leads a team of relationship and psycho-sexual therapists in private practice in the UK; and has his own practice in Berlin.    Follow Andrew on Twitter at @andrewgmarshall   www.andrewgmarshall.com www.couplestherapy.berlin Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/ @blueheart_app Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

In this episode of The Sexual Wellness Sessions hosted by Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist Kate Moyle, we're talking about the topic of sexual diversity and why it's important that we have more understanding around the subject. My guest for this conversation is a world-recognised expert in this space and founder of the organisation Pink Therapy, Dominic Davies.  Gender and sexual diversity is about moving beyond the binary, and explaining how gender and sexuality can be understood along a spectrum. In every society there are dominant narratives about sexuality, gender and sex; and as a result of that there will always be people that don't identify within these often binary ideas, which can present challenges for them.  Dominic and I discuss why it's important to update our understanding around sexuality and gender; how identities can change over the course of our lives, and how all of this can impact our identity, mental health, and how we see ourselves in society. Dominic Davies is a psychotherapist and clinical sexologist and the founder of the organisation Pink Therapy which works with Gender, Sex and Relationship Diverse people both through it's online directory of therapists and through an international online training programme for therapists.  He was recently awarded names as one of "50 Distinguished Gender and Sexual Revolutionaries" in a gala evening commemorating 50 years of sex therapy innovation and research at the University of Minnesota.  https://www.pinktherapy.com/ @pinktherapy_uk Today's episode was brought to you by Blueheart, the easy to use, expert-designed app for couples who are experiencing difficulties with libido - this is one of the most common sexual challenges that couples come up against. Blueheart are challenging the taboo around the subject by making getting help and advice more accessible. Blueheart is removing some of the barriers to make sex therapy possible for everyone, they offer expert-led therapeutic techniques, activities education and guided conversations, all from the app so that you can prioritise your relationship and sexual wellbeing in a way that works for you at your own pace. The Blueheart app is available to download now on Android and iPhone https://www.blueheart.io/ @blueheart_app Kate Moyle is Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, who is passionate about having open and normalising conversations around sex and relationships; and helping people to get to a place of sexual health, happiness and wellbeing.  Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy