Sexual Addiction:Strength/Hope/Recovery

There are alot of theories as to how sex addiction evolves in the lives of men and women. Tonight Carol the Coach interviews Eddie Capparucci who specializes in treating sexual addictions and ography addictions. He works with men who struggle with the addiction by challenging them understand "why" they feel, think and behave the way they do. Together, they embark on a journey of transformation that goes far beyond simply removing the addictive behavior and leads to transformation of the "NEW" guy.

Like other addictions, sexual addiction, or hypersexuality, can be masking deeper issues such as anxiety, stress and depression. How we feel after a sexual experience is usually a good barometer for our intention leading up to it. Do we feel more connected or do we feel less connected, that hollow feeling that can ensue?  Carol the Coach will be interviewing Murray Hidary who is a multi-diciplanary expert at helping people shift their ability to take responsibility and action for their lives.  He has developed a tool he refers to as the MindTravel method which brings radical responsibility to any situation. Viewing an issue through the lens of radical responsibility involves bringing awareness to the behavior and its impacts on our lives and the lives of others, full acceptance of these realizations and then taking intentional action to remedy and move forward in a healthy way. Awareness. Acceptance. Action.  The relationship with our sexuality is an ongoing journey as it is relational, in dynamic response to others and an external expression of our ever evolving inner state. It requires consistent awareness and attention; mindfulness. Through music, reflection and entering into a deep listening to what is going on within and around us the door opens to a life lived with more freedom, no longer at the mercy of our fears and wounds.

Empathy can be inherited but typically it is learned and tonight Carol talks about how to increase empathy through the use of Emotional Maturity Skills.

Carol the Coach is speaking with Jay Stringer who is a licensed mental health counselor and author of the award-winning book Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing. Unwanted is based on a multiyear research project on over 3,800 men and women to address the key drivers of unwanted sexual behavior, be that the use of ography, infidelity, or buying sex. Men and women  wiith compulsive problematic sexual behavior feel this book speaks to the childhood trauma that predesposes sex addiction. Jay's passion is to equip individuals and organizations with resources they need to outgrow their unwanted behaviors. He holds an MDiv and master in counseling psychology from the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and received post-graduate training under Dr. Dan Allender while serving as a Senior Fellow at the Allender Center.

There are lots of issues  for men about masculinity and comparison. Today, Carol the Coach is talking with Masculinity Expert Dr. Doug Carpenter, who has identified the term "Non-AlphaMale which he will be explaining on todays's show. The social perception of masculinity is very black and white: one is either an Alpha Male or a Beta Male, and there can be no variation. However, this is not the reality of masculinity in today's society. Non-Alpha Males exist somewhere in the middle of the masculinity spectrum and are far more common than most people realize. Non-Alpha Males are prone to developmental and behavioral issues caused by gender role conflict, toxic shame, and complex trauma. These, as well as the role of parenting, attachment and abuse issues, gender constructs and socialization, and the resulting addiction, sexual issues, and self-loathing, are explored in Childhood Trauma and the Non-Alpha Male. Dr. Carpenter's book, Childhood Trauma and the Non-Alpha- Gender Role Conflict, Toxic Shame, and Complex Trauma: Finding Hope, Clarity, Healing and Change. offers healthy resolutions through self-acceptance and psychological health. With stories of experiences from actual Non-Alpha Male clients bringing the theoretical into reality, Childhood Trauma and the Non-Alpha Male helps offer healing through hope, clarity, healing, and change.

Sex Addicts can be inandated with resentments that have fueled their sex addiction. 12 Step programs like SA or SAA typically address resentments during the 4th step of recovery. Tonight, Carol will be interviewing Andre who has actively worked his program and wants others to know why it is important to manage them as they come up in your relationships.

Tonight, Carol will be interviewing Nick Stumbo, who has his own personal story of  hope and healing from Sexual Addiction. He believes that men and women need to find support, understanding and grace from thier church.  He is going to talk about the fundamental principles of healthy sexuality and freedom within the church climate. He uses Pure Desire Ministries to help people find fellowship and sobriety.

When people experience abandonment, they are much more likely to develop addictions that numb the pain. Carol the Coach replays this show to help you understand how this creates an issue with attachment that feeds into your addiction.

What does a partner's healing look like after the initial crisis subsides? What is needed when she is past the initial shock?  Tonight, Carol the Coach interviews Lyschel Burket, who knows both personally and professionally.   After years of working with women who have navigated betrayal in their marriage and her own healing journey,  Lyschel is familiar with the question "what's next?" So many women are still not sure how to move through the betrayal or what kind of help to seek out. Well meaning but uninformed support professionals are not giving women the encouragement to find good support for themselves and this is leaving women at a deficit with their own pain and trauma.  Oftentimes Lyschel meets with women who have known about the infidelity and betrayal for years but have never stepped to explore what kind of support is out there for them. They have been sitting in a holding pattern waiting for their husband to get well in hopes that this would help them get well too. In reality they still feel stuck. If you are a partner, today's show will give you some hope about the other side

Clint Davis wants to be able to talk about the balanced approach to therapy that he believes is imperative to creating real change in sex addicts. His treatment modalities include  massage therapy, chiropractic care, a dietary modifications, to engage the client in looking at all aspects of his life. He explains, "We believe that working from a trauma informed model can help people make lasting change not just to their behavior but in their hearts. We are a Christian organization so we integrate faith and scripture if our clients ask for that while at the same time respecting others views and beliefs." Tonight, he will talk about the the ACE Scale and sexual neglect being a huge issue and core reason sex addiction happens. He will speak about technology, age gaps, and the negative effects of social media and its links and difficulties when recovering from sex addiction or betrayal trauma.