Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

My guest today is Cindy Muchnick.  Listen in this week as Cindy and I talk about “The Parent Compass” book & movement, a guide for parents on how to pull back & let go through the teen years. Moving from managing everything for your little kids to pulling back & giving your teens the reins can be really hard, but we have to do it. Cindy shares some tips for inviting feedback from your adolescent and why, sometimes, we do want our kids to struggle. I ask Cindy about how to talk to teens and stay solution-focused when they don’t seem to be a good fit or interested in a typical, four-year college path. We end by sharing thoughts on over-tutoring, letter grades, monitoring your teen’s grades, & picking colleges. Takeaways from the show “The Parent Compass” book & movement  Moving from manager to consultant during the teen years  Inviting feedback from your teen  Staying “fiercely committed & lovingly detached”  Building resiliency by doing hard things  Gap years & options outside of four-year colleges  Conversations when your teen is struggling with academics  What does “do your best” really mean? Over-tutoring, letter grades, & choosing colleges  For full show notes, including transcriptions, visit our website here.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's podcast is a solo show with your host, Casey O'Roarty.Today the content comes straight from the Joyful Courage for Parents of Teens Facebook group. I talk a lot with my clients and here on the pod about "energetic responsibility" and a mama posted a question asking me to go deeper. The result is this podcast! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My guest today is someone who is a friend to the JC pod, DeAntwann “DJ” Johnson.This episode is all about mutual respect. Casey and DJ start by talking about how the idea of respect has changed from the 1950’s to today, and how kids & teens today are asking to & expecting to be respected. We teach respect by being respectful. They dig into whether or not kids need to earn their dignity, our respect, and our love (spoiler: they don’t). DJ points out that the way we treat our children at home is the basis for what they expect from other adults outside of the home, and Casey explains how kids being disrespected in their home can show up as defiance & disconnection. DJ shares stepping stones you can use when young people are disrespectful, a bit about how teenage brain development plays in, and how to be a leader from a place of service for your teen. Casey finishes up by touching on the power of “and” - teaching & expecting kids to respect themselves AND the person in front of them.Takeaways from the show: Showing up respectfully and modeling respect for our teens  The difference between respect and being nice  Cultivating and teaching respect by being respectful, not by demanding it  Kids deserve respect, dignity, & love - they don’t need to earn it  Disrespect in the home showing up as defiance and disconnect  Softening, respecting, and loving your kids regardless of how they’re showing up  Leading from a place of service  Teaching teens to respect themselves AND the person in front of them  For full show notes including transcriptions, visit our website here.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week's show is a solo show with your host, Casey O'Roarty.It's you and me, babe! You. And. Me. Another solo show for diving into work of parenting teens and rolling around in it together. Today I am talking about how encouragement can be a tool for relationship, skill building and showing up as our best. I share language and thoughts about how to uplevel the encouragement in YOUR home so that your teens are more likely to step into cooperation and collaboration. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My guest today is Rachel Macy Stafford.  Rachel joins Casey today to share about her new book, “Soul Shift,” and how to find joy and get back to yourself. Rachel shares the painful truth that started her journey. Casey and Rachel connect over the challenges that raising teens can bring, and how we can be present, relationship-focused, and connected with them during the tough times. Rachel shares a beautiful story about how being human and vulnerable with your teens allows them to be authentic with you, too. They touch on the messiness of teens and how we need to deeply know our children so we can best support them. Rachel shares some of her best practices to find self-worth & growth, like speaking to yourself compassionately and taking time for yourself.   Takeaways from the show Cultivating the practice of presence  Asking yourself and owning why you do what you do  Finding time to nurture yourself  Uncovering and responding to one’s deepest truths  Connecting with your teen through presence  Being real, authentic, & vulnerable with your teen  Presence as a door opener for your teen  Letting go of distractions and prioritizing connection  Finding your self-worth  Being in your experience vs. observing the experience  For more show notes including full transcripts, visit our website here.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My guest today is Domari Dickenson. Domari shares how she got started on her Conscious Parenting & Positive Discipline journey. They discuss what Conscious Parenting, Positive Parenting, & Gentle Parenting mean and if those are helpful labels. Domari shares her tips for those of us who are transitioning to a different parenting style, including identifying & digging into your own triggers, leading with love & grace, and feeling all of your feelings. Domari Dickinson is an unschooling mom of four, a certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator, and a liberation partner. She provides specialized programs and coaching services that invite parents to identify their oppressive parenting practices while co-creating spaces where they can discuss how to implement more liberatory, love-centered practices that are focused on freedom, respect, and autonomy. Domari is also an educational consultant and serves on the board for the Alliance of Self-Directed Education. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Bringing this show back from the vault to remember how we can get clear if we are responding to our kids in a way that is helpful and guiding them towards life skill building. Listen in as I break down the five criteria for Positive Discipline and how it looks in real life with our kids. See all the show notes at www.besproutable.com/podcasts/TBT-259-SOLO-Is-this-positive-discipline Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My guest today is Dr. Chris Willard.  Dr. Willard explains how trying to teach mindfulness to teens ended up being a learning opportunity for himself and why he wrote his new book, “How we Grow Through What We Go Through.” He explains the three types of trauma, then Casey & Chris connect on how much self-work needs to be done to parent teens. Casey asks what the first steps are for moving through triggers, and Dr. Willard shares how children & teens can be the catalyst for us to do that work. They dig into why we don’t punish adolescents and what tools to use when things do go sideways with your teen like pausing, responding vs. reacting, mindfulness, anticipating, co-regulating, building trust, & asking “what are both learning?” Dr. Willard and Casey wrap-up today by sharing some specific breathing strategies for all ages. Key takeaways from the show Post-traumatic growth  The three types of trauma   Doing the self-work to parent our teens First steps for moving through triggers  The benefits of making amends & repair with children  Why we don’t punish adolescents “Draw out their best, don’t punish out their worst”  Tools for a dysregulated parent to stay connected & supportive  Asking “what are both learning?”  Starting early to build co-regulation strategies  Breathing strategies for all-ages  For full show notes including transcripts, visit our website here.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join me during this solo show as I talk about "holding the container" for our teens to move through their experiences and practice life skills. Easier said than done. I walk us thought what this looks like in the context of sibling relationships, substance experimenting, school, chores and more - check it out and let me know what you think!Get more show notes at www.besproutable.com/podcasts/eps-367-solo-holding-container-teens-life-skills Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

My guest today is Dr. Shefali Tsabary.  Dr. Shefali begins by sharing her journey into motherhood & discovering conscious parenting. She shares a bit about what her new book, “The Parenting Map” covers. Casey and Dr. Shefali talk about how challenging it is to look inward and how we work towards growth, not perfection. They dig into challenging any narratives you may have for your own children and finding your flow. Casey asks how we can get past the “smoke screen” and dig in deeper into what’s going on with misbehavior. They talk about teens practicing regulation and about how individuation & defiance are not only developmentally appropriate but necessary. Dr. Shefali shares her five F’s of parents: fighter, fixer, feigner, freezer, fleer and how to acknowledge and calm your ego. They wrap up talking on being in partnership with your child, how & why negotiating with your kids can actually be a good thing, and why we don’t use punishment. Takeaways from the show What is conscious parenting?  Dr. Shefali’s new book: “The Parenting Map”  The challenges of looking inward  Parenting is about growth, not perfection Challenging & deconstructing your narratives  The “iceberg” and “smoke screen” behind behaviors  Defiance is developmentally healthy  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices