Getting Unstuck – Cultivating Curiosity

Guest Sarah Elkins is a keynote speaker, Gallup StrengthsFinder coach, and the author and podcast host of Your Stories Don't Define You, How You Tell Them Will. She is the principal at Elkins' Consulting. She is the organizing genius behind the annual No Longer Virtual Summit, a small business summit for those looking for a community of professionals to grow with - personally, professionally, and thoughtfully. In her work with coaching clients, Sarah guides individuals to enhance their communication by using storytelling as the foundation of their collaboration. What she's realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don't realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they're sharing them with. Her work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on her podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. Summary In this episode, Sarah and I discuss our key takeaways from her recent "No Longer Virtual Summit." We reflect on sessions that focused on finding a target audience and identifying one's "content personality type." We also explore how they've applied these concepts to their work. I share how I've narrowed the focus of my podcast to center on curiosity and innovation, while Sarah talks about incorporating storytelling and the StrengthsFinder assessment into her public speaking coaching. We both emphasize the importance of vulnerability, personal stories, and targeting a specific audience to build authentic connections and achieve career clarity. Key Takeaways Narrow your focus to find your target audience. Instead of trying to appeal to a broad market, solopreneurs should "shoot with a rifle, not with a shotgun" by focusing on a specific audience based on their values and the problems they solve for clients. Embrace your "content personality type" for business development. Identifying how you work best, such as in-person or through reflection, can guide how you build your business and get people to care about your services. Use storytelling to build authentic connections. Sharing personal stories that demonstrate your skills and values can create a deeper, more memorable connection with others. This is particularly effective for leaders and professionals in networking situations. Social Media: Your Stories Don't Define You, How You Tell Them Will Book: To support your local bookstore, visit Bookshop.org. Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-stories-dont-define-you-how-you-tell-them-will/id1329558957

Guest Dr. Constantino "Costa" Aguilar is a distinguished educational leader with over 29 years of transformative service in public education. Throughout his dynamic career, Dr. Aguilar has demonstrated extraordinary commitment to student success and organizational excellence, serving in a wide range of leadership roles, including Spanish Teacher, Head Baseball Coach, Associate Principal, Principal, Executive Director of Technology and Innovation, and Assistant Superintendent of Educational Services in the Merced Union High School District. He currently serves as the Superintendent of Riverbank Unified School District, where he continues to lead with strategic vision, innovation, and a relentless focus on equity and achievement for all students. Dr. Aguilar's exceptional leadership has been recognized at the state level. He is a proud recipient of the prestigious "Honoring Our Own" award from the California Association of Latino Superintendents and Administrators (CALSA) and has been named Mentoring Minds California Administrator of the Year. His accolades also include ACSA Region 9 Principal of the Year, Career Technical Education (CTE) Administrator of the Year, and District Principal and Co-Administrator of the Year—testaments to his ability to inspire teams, elevate learning environments, and drive sustainable change. Summary Dr. Constantino "Costa" Aguilar is a superintendent in his third year at Riverbank Unified School District. Costa shares his journey from being a Spanish teacher to becoming a superintendent and discusses his vision for educational reform. He highlights the importance of social-emotional learning and dual enrollment programs—high school and college—and emphasizes the need to teach students how to be productive members of society. Costa outlines the challenges facing education today, including social disengagement, mental health issues, and the integration of artificial intelligence. He also stresses the need for community engagement, parent involvement, and a shift away from antiquated, adult-centric school systems. Key Takeaways Educational Purpose and Reform: According to Costa, the current national K12 school system is "incredibly antiquated" and no longer serves students' needs. He believes the purpose of schooling should be to provide every student with the opportunity to pursue their dreams, regardless of what they are. Costa advocates for changes like different scheduling and focusing on mastery learning over traditional grading. The Role of Community and Social-Emotional Learning: Costa emphasizes the importance of unifying the community and building trust between parents and the school system. He believes social-emotional learning (SEL) is a foundational and essential component of education, helping students develop emotional intelligence and learn how to be productive social members of society. Challenges of Modern Education: The biggest challenges Costa faces include how to use artificial intelligence, improving literacy skills, and student mental health. Social Media Riverbank Unified School District

In this episode, I reflect on some of the "No" responses I receive from potential guests. I have hosted this show for seven years and 376 episodes, yet some of my most popular episodes are about guests who declined to be on the show. I discuss three types of "Nos": a direct "No," an initial "Yes" followed by silence, and no response at all. I note that the rejections that linger with me are from guests I desperately wanted to host. I explain that I sometimes share these stories with my listeners to create something out of nothing and to explain what sparked my curiosity in the first place. I conclude that while a "No" still stings, I have learned not to take it personally; it is a fact of podcast life.

Guest Nanci Morris Lyon is a long-time resident of Bristol Bay, Alaska, living in King Salmon, where she owns Bear Trail Lodge on the famed Naknek River. She is a long-time leader in Bristol Bay conservation and has been an essential voice in the fight against the Pebble Mine. As the first female guide in Bristol Bay and one of the first in Alaska, she is an inspiration for many young women pursuing careers in the sport-fishing world. She was instrumental in the creation of the Bristol Bay Guide Academy, and 14 years later, she continues to be the lead instructor at the Academy, currently guiding some of her past students into roles as academy instructors. She is also a role model for guides throughout the country, demonstrating and emphasizing the importance of getting involved in fisheries management and conservation as a sport-fishing professional. She has donated her time to several important Bristol Bay fisheries documents, including the Southwest Alaska Rainbow Trout management plan and the Nushagak King Salmon Management plan. Among the Bristol Bay guide circle, she is known as the "Queen of the Naknek." Summary Nanci discusses her unique path to becoming a fishing guide and lodge operator. She shares her personal history, including graduating from high school at 16, working in veterinary medicine, and then building homes in Anchorage before a personal loss led her to a new career in guiding. Nanci highlights the importance of cultivating a strong customer service culture at the lodge, where employees are treated like family and encouraged to go beyond their basic duties. She also talks about her involvement in environmental issues, particularly her opposition to the proposed Pebble Mine, and her role in establishing a fly fishing guide academy for local youth. Key Takeaways Exceptional Customer Service is a Taught Culture: Nanci emphasizes that outstanding customer service is not accidental but a deliberate part of the company culture. She leads by example, showing employees that no task is too small, and she hires people who are genuinely interested in connecting with guests rather than just performing a job. She looks for individuals who want to "meet people where they're at" and make a positive impact on their day. Environmental Advocacy is Crucial in Remote Areas: The interview highlights the fragility of Alaska's natural resources and the importance of protecting them. Nanci's involvement in fighting against projects like the Pebble Mine, which threatened the entire Bristol Bay ecosystem, demonstrates how individuals and businesses in remote locations can become key advocates for environmental preservation and the subsistence lifestyles that depend on them. Challenges Foster Resilience: Nanci's life story, from losing her brother to adapting to the demands of a remote Alaskan lifestyle, illustrates how adversity can build resilience. She believes that stepping out of one's comfort zone, especially in an environment where self-reliance is essential, makes people better. This mentality is a core part of her character, as she views challenges as opportunities rather than insults Social Media Bear Trail Lodge

Today on Getting Unstuck—Cultivating Curiosity One of the many problems that plague U.S. businesses, not-for-profits, and our U.S. education system is when and how to change. For many institutions, the process can look like fruit-of-the-month club: they try "this" until a new "this" comes along. A new something – process, way of thinking, way of leading etc. – is seen as the answer to all organizational ills . . . until a new, shinier something takes its place. As a result, employees are whipped-sawed by an unending stream of changes, and sustained results are rarely achieved. One who wrote at length about this problem was Jim Collins in his landmark book, Good to Great. There he looked at what great performing organizations do that good performing organizations typically don't do. One of the habits that great organizations instinctively employ is something Collins called "the flywheel" – a process involving 4-6 elements with each element impacting / driving the next. The thinking went: "If we do "A," then "B" will happen, which will cause "C" to happen, which will cause "D" and so on. Each element is a consequence of the element that came before it. As Collins wrote: "Pushing with great effort, you get the flywheel to inch forward. You keep pushing, and with persistent effort, you get the flywheel to complete on entire turn. You don't stop. You keep pushing. The flywheel moves a bit fast. Then as some point —breakthrough! The flywheel flies forward with almost unstoppable momentum." Guest The book was written about U.S. business, but the question was quickly asked, "Would this thinking work for not-for-profits and specifically, education?" One educator who was immediately intrigued is Dr. Deb Gustafson. Now retired, at the time of this interview, Deb was the Executive Director of Student Services for the Geary County Unified School District 475 based in Junction City, KS. She is the former principal of Ware Elementary School, and that's where she started turning a flywheel that still turns today. Listen for • What the situation like at Ware Elementary when Deb became principal. • What it was about Collins' book that most impacted Deb. • Why the first practice Deb installed as part of her flywheel – see the illustration – was "select teachers infused with passion." • What Deb saw as the ultimate goal – the why, the purpose, the cause – behind what they we're trying to accomplish at Ware. • The distinction we draw in the interview around "urgency." There was "urgency" in needing to do something to resolve the pain that students and teachers are experiencing, but it wasn't an urgency of pace or timing; it was an urgency around the imperative to take the right action where none had been taken before. • How Deb saw it as critical to "align, apply and enhance" any new initiatives and practices to the existing ones. • The impact the flywheel experience had as Deb trained new administrators. For reflection At one point in the interview, Deb noted "You just have to get to the root causes of what you need in your environment to sustain performance." How often does your current organization actually identify root causes or the real problem to be solved? For more information Turning the Flywheel by Jim Collins

Guest Hannah Bratterud is a Norwegian-born writer, consultant, and real estate advisor living in Montana. Through her Substack "Finding Home," she explores themes of identity, belonging, and transformation, particularly in times of personal or political upheaval. A leadership strategist by trade and a curious wanderer at heart, Hannah recently shared her journey of becoming an American citizen amid rising national uncertainty. Her work invites readers to question assumptions, embrace complexity, and keep choosing where and how they belong. Summary Hannah, who has now lived in the U.S. for 30 years, explains her decision to seek American citizenship now. She discusses the "paradox of America" – a nation founded on freedom but marked by historical injustices and inequality. Hannah is drawn to the U.S. for its opportunities and individual freedom, yet acknowledges the need to address systemic inequities and support marginalized groups. Her desire for civic engagement and to actively contribute to a more inclusive society drives her decision. Key Takeaways: Hannah's decision to seek U.S. citizenship now was, in part, influenced by the strong anti-immigration sentiment so prevalent today. If she were to leave the U.S. to visit relatives in Norway, would she be able to re-enter if she were not a citizen? She describes America as a paradox, valuing its promise of freedom and opportunity while acknowledging its historical foundations of genocide and slavery, and ongoing inequality. Hannah's motivation for becoming a U.S. citizen stems from a desire for civic engagement and to actively work towards creating freedom and opportunity for historically oppressed groups in America. Social Media Previous interview on Getting Unstuck: Learning to Invest in Yourself – A Transformation Story with Hannah Bratterud Substack article: Becoming American

Guest None today; just me reflecting on recent events. Summary In this episode, I recount my recent fly fishing trip to Alaska, reflecting on how various organizations shaped my experience. Delta Airlines impressed him with personalized service and proactive rebooking. In contrast, an overpriced and unwelcoming airport hotel in Detroit left a negative impression. The Bear Trail Lodge in Alaska, however, stood out for its commitment to guest experience, environmental consciousness, and celebration of local culture, reinforcing the idea that a brand is defined by a series of customer touch points, not just its primary service. Key Points: A successful vacation, and by extension, a positive organizational experience, depends on mindset, handling unexpected issues, and interactions with external organizations. Organizations like Delta Airlines and the Bear Trail Lodge demonstrate an understanding that their overall brand and reputation are built upon numerous customer touch points, not just their core service. Personalized service, attention to detail (like a handwritten note or addressing customers by name), and embodying a brand's values contribute significantly to customer loyalty and satisfaction.

Guest "Brave Leadership" founder Kimberly Davis champions emerging leaders and senior managers navigating today's workplace and partners with HR professionals looking to develop talent. She shares her inspirational message of personal power, responsibility, and impact with organizations nationwide and teaches leadership programs worldwide. Kimberly is a TEDx speaker whose 2018 book, Brave Leadership, was named one of Inc. Magazine's most impactful books, became an Amazon bestseller in the Business Leadership and Motivation category, and received the Benjamin Franklin Silver Award. She lives in San Diego, CA, with her husband, Tim, and cat, Sulley Magee, while their son, Jeremy, is living his brave in college. Summary Kimberly asserts that effective business leadership is inextricably linked to strong personal leadership, emphasizing that individuals must first believe they are leaders. She emphasizes the crucial importance of understanding one's impact on others and being intentional in interactions. A key tool she introduces is the "super objective," which, in part, emerged from her training in the theater. The super objective helps leaders clarify the desired outcome—what they want others to do, think, feel, say, or believe. By applying these techniques, individuals can develop self-belief, cultivate the potential for authentic leadership, and consciously shape their influence, ultimately transforming their impact on both their professional and personal worlds. Three Important Takeaways Personal Leadership is Foundational: True leadership begins with self-awareness and self-belief; without personal leadership, effective business leadership is unattainable. Intentional Impact: Leaders must be acutely aware of the impact they have on others through their energy and actions, and should define a "super objective" to intentionally guide their desired influence. Unconventional Development: Leveraging techniques from outside the traditional business environment, such as theater's "super objective," provides powerful, unique tools for cultivating self-belief and the potential for authentic leadership. Social Media/Referenced https://brave-leadership.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimberlydavisonstage/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgCBVGBHGx4

Guest Michelle Petties is a TEDx speaker, Food Story coach, and author of the award-winning memoir Leaving Large: The Stories of a Food Addict. She reveals how emotional wounds, cultural expectations, and personal history—not hunger—often shape our relationship with food. After battling emotional overeating for decades and gaining and losing over 700 pounds, Michelle discovered that the key to lasting weight loss wasn't another diet—it was rewriting the stories behind her eating. With a background in media sales and leadership at companies like Radio One, Disney/ABC, and NPR/PBS member stations, Michelle now uses storytelling as a tool for transformation. Through workshops, retreats, and her ebook Mind Over Meals, she helps others uncover their food truths, rewire their thinking, and create lasting change from the inside out. Summary Michelle's pivotal "watershed moment" occurred when she realized, after decades of struggling, that food's true purpose is nourishment, not fulfilling emotional needs. This insight, coupled with a powerful family story about inherited food memories, profoundly transformed her relationship with eating. Michelle emphasizes that sustainable weight loss stems from deep internal, mental work—unpacking thoughts, emotions, and beliefs—rather than focusing solely on diet or exercise. Three Important Takeaways Processed Food Addiction: Processed foods are deliberately designed to be addictive, making it extremely challenging for individuals to exert willpower against their engineered palatability and leading to cycles of overeating and weight gain. Beyond Emotional Eating: Eating can be driven by a wide array of emotions beyond stress or comfort, including curiosity, jealousy, the desire for status, or people-pleasing, which often go unrecognized as triggers for unhealthy food choices. Mental Work for Lasting Change: True and sustainable transformation in one's relationship with food and weight loss comes from addressing underlying thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, and viewing food as a source of nutrition. Social Media/Referenced Website: https://michellepetties.com/ TEDx Talk, A Food Addict's Lesson: Confusion. Clarity. Recovery. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJLr53XlIV4 Portfolio: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1bwxhm8KbbjtfsjEc1w8qD7Qqe8LJ4EEj/view YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIbMxXOSCNH--MCNru4WuLw Instagram: https://instagram.com/iambrandnewnow Facebook: https://facebook.com/iambrandnewnow LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-petties/ Essays:https://vocal.media/humans/loving-your-self Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@iambrandnewnow?lang=en

Guest Irene Stern Frielich is the daughter of a German Jewish Holocaust survivor—but for much of her life, the story remained unspoken. In 2017, after rediscovering her father's testimony, Irene set out to physically retrace his escape route from Nazi Germany through his survival in Holland. The result was a journey of reconciliation and healing. Her award-winning memoir, Shattered Stars, Healing Hearts, explores trauma, courage, and connection across generations. Why This Episode Matters In this deeply moving conversation, Irene discusses the memoir that retraces her father's footsteps across Germany and Holland during World War II. Sparked by the 2017 Charlottesville rally, she embarked on multiple research trips to understand her father's wartime experience, including his escape during Kristallnacht at age 12 and being hidden for two-and-a-half years in an attic. Through visiting actual locations and meeting descendants of both rescuers and perpetrators, Irene discovered the concept of inherited family trauma and began her own healing process. The conversation explores themes of courage, historical memory, and the power of standing where history happened. Three Important Takeaways Inherited family trauma affects multiple generations - Both descendants of Holocaust victims and perpetrators carry psychological impacts from their family histories, often without fully understanding these influences until later in life. Physical presence at historical sites creates a profound connection - Standing where events occurred provides emotional and spiritual experiences that reading about history cannot replicate, offering deeper understanding and healing opportunities. Human connection transcends historical divisions - Meeting descendants of both rescuers and those who harmed her family allowed Irene to find common ground and begin healing conversations across historical divides. Referenced Website, including available presentations: www.shatteredstars.org About the book: Book trailer Follow the journey: https://www.facebook.com/ShatteredStarsHealingHearts Stolpersteine laying video with English subtitles: https://youtu.be/XZkZx6ynJls Chapter-by-chapter Book Notes, including photos: https://shatteredstars.org/book-notes/