Sex Birth Trauma with Kimberly Ann Johnson

What Kimberly Shares Her work with sexuality, birth, and the postpartum time How these often misunderstood parts of our lives can lead to our healing and our soul work Practical tools to start exploring these topics in your own life today What You'll Hear: Kimberly's perspective on what helps heal us the most The importance of reestablishing connection and trust The fears that can come up around healing and living a life without feeling your trauma Kimberly describes her unique, multifaceted approach to helping women How often the pelvis and genitals go unattended while the rest of our body is cared for How Kimberly models how a great interaction can happen – slowly, narrated, explicitly consensual, and much more Kimberly's three rules for intimacy How sharing your sexual "code" can build trust What are your absolute no's and your absolute yes's? "If meeting someone is A, kissing them is B and D, and penetration is R…what happens between D and R?" Most people are looking for "great sex" but don't realize that this typical lack in creative, internally generated sexual inquiry is keeping them in their routines Rachael shares a few of her own yes's and no's "The reason we come to connection is to heal, that's the repair." What Kimberly wished the world knew about the postpartum window The "42 days for 42 years" rule that exists in many cultures and the important standards it sets for postpartum care How Kimberly's rules for intimacy relate to the postpartum time How the window of time after birth is an entry point into our soul work, and every birth story has wisdom to offer Kimberly's definition of a physiological birth "If we reclaim birth, as women, the world will change." The body that comes with you into birth affects the way you give birth – your physical injury history, sexual history, family history, etc How practicing exploratory sex can prepare your body for birth How and why Kimberly and Rachael are cultivating the "108 women" in the world Kimberly shares some of the events, mentors, and teachers in her life that shaped her road toward full sexual expression "It takes the smallest step." Start simple, start small. How do you know what to ask for? How do you explore your own interoception? Think of a simple checklist of things you like and want to feel Even when it's heavy, bring some light and joy into your healing process!

"The way to save the world is more embodiment." "Love all of your body just the way it is." What You'll Hear: How somatic experiencing can help us connect to our core self The pervasiveness of "sexuality trauma" in our society The pushback against sexuality in the United States and how it has affected practitioners' training Ariel's unique journey to somatic experiencing and what she has learned from over 40 years of being involved in the healing arts What Ariel Shares: Sexuality trauma and its connection to disembodiment and cultural shame (2:28) Infertility and disembodiment (5:00) Why being sex-positive doesn't necessarily mean being embodied (5:58) "Our definition of trauma is so narrow." (7:30) Birth as a somatic experience (9:40) We are out of touch with our organic, primitive selves (11:08) The role of fear in disembodiment (13:23) The relational aspect of trauma work (20:33) "Sexological body work...everybody needs it!" (23:10) Why is sexuality missing in somatic experience training? (24:00) The pushback against sexuality in the U.S. (31:55) How the collective influences our personal experiences of sexual trauma (38:55) Can trauma and pleasure coexist? (41:10) Somatic experiencing as a guided meditation (46:15) Sexuality work is important for men too! (47:08) The balance between self-responsibility and societal change (52:10) Self-acceptance to change the world (54:38) Her new book (56:49)

Marcia Lopez is the owner of Women's True Healing. Marcia is an accomplished healer serving the Los Angeles communities since 2005. https://www.womenstruehealing.com/ Marcia uses the old ways in new ways and has been achieving extraordinary results in female reproductive health dysfunction, infertility, and sexual trauma recovery. She blends her expansive knowledge and initiations with her own healing/recovery journey to create a space that is safe, profound, healing, and empowering. What You'll Hear: How our social and political environments influence our personal health and healing The importance of healing our relationship to our wombs Her personal journey to healing and embodiment and how it has influenced her work What Marcia Shares: The intersection of personal healing and collective healing (3:15) We first experience life in-utero (4:44) We are inherently connected to our ancestors (5:40) How she knew she needed to heal her relationship with her reproductive system (7:18) What practices she implemented in her healing journey (10:50) Forgiveness is an important part of healing (13:40) Forgiving vs. Forgiveness (18:03) What she learned from her tantra studies (21:33) Sexual energy and sexuality in tantra (24:23) Finding your own way as a student (26:10) The importance of feeling safe and honoring your boundaries (30:48) How politics influence our individual health (37:54) We need to teach people how to take care of themselves (41:16) Financial health is important too! (46:21) Her favorite resources for financial health (49:50) "Fierceness is something that we lose as humans." (54:15) What she wants all women to know (56:08) Where you can find her work online (57:29)

What Racha Shares: -her personal story as a black midwife in the United States, her pilgrimage to South Africa and initiation into becoming a Sangoma -her insights about the systemic racism within health care -the challenges women of colour are facing on their path to becoming midwives -the sacrifices and decisions she has made to make her career work as a single mother -the need for 'passing the baton' and creating a 'seat at the table' for black women to affect change within midwifery and beyond What You'll Hear: -her pilgrimage to South Africa and her initiation into becoming a Sangoma (healer) -her journey as a rite of passage -the revelation she had after returning from black majority population in South Africa to a white majority in the U.S -the shift in the clients who are now hiring her and the connections they are making -the current state of black midwifery & systemic racism in health care -the barriers of becoming a midwife in America as a black woman -meeting the needs of her community with worst birth/health statistics -her commitment to taking on black student midwives & why she doesn't charge for preceptorship -people in power need to relinquish some of their power for real change -reparations & midwifery -racism in midwifery (particularly in the Southern states) and how midwifery is still illegal in the some states -why Racha uses her privilege to speak up for apprentice and beginner midwives -why she chooses to be licensed -the lack of support and abuse women of color are facing during their apprenticeships as midwives -single mothering and the importance of leaning on your community -building awareness, strategizing for change outside of social media and how to continue the conversation

What You'll Hear: The inspiration for Molly's memoir Her exploration of postpartum rage The connection between storytelling and healing Anger in our culture today, how it connects to the postpartum period and what it can teach us about ourselves What Molly Shares: The provocative title of Molly's book and why she chose it (2:00) How Molly's journey through birth and early motherhood inspired the book (3:45) Her exploration of and questions about rage (5:45) Childbirth as a portal to access hidden, unconscious psychic material (6:20) Even a little bit of anger is extremely threatening for many women to express (7:12) We are all dealing with anger (8:07) The necessity of questioning the integrity of the family unit in order to move forward with creative work (10:10) Molly's relationship to her mother and how this appears in her book (10:40) Kimberly's unique relationship with her midwife (13:20) Why Kimberly had to tell her story and the importance of knowing it's not the only story (14:19) The struggle to gain the capacity to deal with anger without misdirecting it (17:20) "What do we do with this anger that's really ours to work through that doesn't need to land on another person?" (17:50) The current cultural experience of anger (18:20) How childbirth disrupts the ideal of gender equality (18:48) The need to adjust expectations, which may not happen until the embodied experience makes it happen (19:58) The tendency to train ourselves out of our innate biological intelligence (20:45) Couples today are trying to rescript a lot of engrained ideas of family and it's complicated (21:43) A new emerging archetype of womanhood (20:51) "How do we give people permission to talk about the real experience without it becoming the race to the noble victim position?" Molly's process in finding the balance between sharing both positive and negative truths (23:50) The "meeting of the minds" between the generations of mothers (25:07) The different challenges and benefits between this new generation of mothers and the last (26:40) What lower expectations look like to Molly (30:07) How the embodied experience of birth will never be shared and the tension this creates (31:20) Where in Molly's path of recovery she started writing her book (33:39) Her practice of taking notes (34:35) She wrote the first draft in 12 days (34:40) What her writing is doing now (36:23) Kimberly shares the concept of pendulation from Somatic Experiencing (37:17) Rage is the fullest expression of the sympathetic nervous system (40:43) The physical feeling Molly experienced after she finished writing her book (42:08) "The telling of the story is not what's healing, it's how we tell the story and if the body is a part of that." (44:00) How do we shake the narrative in order to create space for something new? (44:47) Kimberly and Molly's workshop on somatics, writing, and womanhood (47:07) Who is the workshop for? (49:17) If Molly had a megaphone she would share…(50:38) Healthy rage and aggression can go into the creative process and action (52:29)

EP36: Christiane Pelmas on Menopause, Sexuality, and an Emerging Archetype of Womanhood What Christiane Shares: - her personal experiences with her cycle, abortion, perimenopause and menopause—and the intelligence of these initiations - how her experience with menopause informed major decisions in her life including her living arrangement with her partner, her pace, her work in the world - the potential for whole listening, erotic sex, generative power and a QUEEN existence from our menopausal years and its deep purpose globally What You Will Hear: - Christiane shares her own menstrual and perimenopausal cycle and the significance of discussing in our culture, her relationship to her cycle - Kimberly shares about aging and the wishing she had known the wisdom of her cycle earlier - Realizing the empowering and embodying experience of birth and breastfeeding more deeply once reaching perimenopause - Giving bleeding the respect it deserves, the products we use to disguise menstruation, and what this says to our youth - How this lack of respect affects women today regarding fertility, inability to reach orgasm, painful periods - Why Kimberly challenges modern Postpartum Depression, her own personal story of "Russian Roulette'' when it came to having a child - The blindspot around birth control and our daughters (including those who are 'sex positive' or in wellness profession) - What Christiane comes across in her practice, the messaging around perimenopause and menopause - Christiane shares her personal story with abortion, fertility and birth/postpartum experiences, and menopause - Description of menopausal rite of passage and initiatory shift from Christiane's experience and perspective, sending children out into the world and circulating Kundalini, orgasmic experience, fire and warriorship that is born when bleeding stops and it's offering to the world - Christiane challenges the mainstream advice of moving into quiet, self care hibernation and calls women at this time the 'warrior class' and potential 'enemies of the state' meant to bring necessary change toward the feminine - Why regardless if a woman stays in her relationship the old must die and what looks like 'falling apart' is actually refinement and a new expression of self - How even holistic doctors are treating menopause (much like pregnancy) as a series of symptoms rather than of initiatory experiences - Christiane's experience with Holistic and Functional Medicine care and bioidentical hormones during a difficult last year and despite great results to cease care and listen to an internal voice saying "this is not for you" - The small yet 'radical' lifestyle changes she made to accommodate her body - The vast potential of pleasure beyond clitorial stimulation available to women before during and after menopause, the ridiculousness of the word 'foreplay', the potential to enjoy sex beyond menopause and the exploration - The 'cougar' metaphor Christiane's and Kimberly's perspective - "Is sex better now?" - How we've learned to silence our longing, or made wrong our dissatisfaction is actually the most important information to listen to especially during menopausal years - Christiane shares about the importance of 'whole listening' and how and where to resource this and the courage to act on it, our place historically as a female population - The inspiration for her podcast OneWoman Radio References: https://www.christianepelmas.com/ https://www.onewoman.org/ http://www.susunweed.com/WiseWomanHerbals.htm#meno

What You'll Hear: The relationship between holistic health and optimal fertility What's missing from the current medical approach Dr. Zagone's unique, holistic work combining environmental, physical and emotional components How the fertility journey can be a process of internal growth and maturity Success stories from her practice What Dr. Zagone Shares: Her definition of fertility (1:56) What's missing from the current conversation about fertility (3:40) How cultivating health is cultivating fertility (4:39) Kimberly's "foundation of okay-ness" and how it relates to fertility (6:45) Self-responsibility vs. self-care (7:56) Physiological stress and its effect on fertility (9:28) We have a built in compass for how our fertility is doing (11:40) "How much of our biology are we willing to push against?" (12:45) Age and fertility (14:20) What traditionally defines an infertility diagnosis (14:50) How genetics and epigenetics play a role (16:00) How we make a "problem" out of fertility (16:54) The role of environmental toxins in shifting rates of fertility (18:15) The importance of talking about sex with her couples (21:45) Tapping into what is really true in the moment, finding the creative power which is the fertility (23:20) Why it's important to work with the couple as a unit. Fertility is a team sport! (25:46) The holistic components to fertility that Dr. Zagone examines with each couple (27:38) "If the baby is meant to come it will come." (30:00) What goes on in the forest!? (31:45) It's important that all women understand postpartum health, whether they have kids or not, because we have all experienced some kind of loss (37:15) How the fertility journey helps women and couples cultivate the skills that will help them in parenthood (39:30) Her success rate with women under 40 (45:00) How the medical model focuses on managing symptoms instead of total healing (46:28) The importance of honoring the body and the emotions in the same context (47:20) The importance of working on your relationship (51:45) The first two questions Dr. Zagone asks her couples (53:55) Where you can find her work online (54:43) http://www.theholisticfertilitymethod.com/

Jaguar Round Table- Five women share what changed for them from Activate your Inner Jaguar - Sex is better - Stopped picking skin on their hands (a longtime habit that had been addressed many different ways) - Learning to how to stay present with what feels good during sex (instead of what doesn't) - How to learn what her system needs and to ASK for it- changing her relationship - Sexual intimacy more open and with more possibilities - Learned better boundaries and said "no" and the person accepted it! - How to deal with introversion when you need to be social

Nicole Coffelt, PhD is a Licensed Psychologist, a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, provocateur and shamanic artist. Nikki has had the opportunity to travel and experience many diverse cultures including her own ancestral American Indian roots and brings this experience and wisdom to her healing work. Nikki has extensively worked through her own addictions and trauma and offers the gift of her capacity to transmute pain and suffering into healing energy. Nikki is the sole owner of a private psychotherapy practice in San Francisco and the artist of Emboldened Expressions:: fine art by + for the Unapologetically Savage.What She Shares: phD and post doctoral fellow at Stanford University Medical Center by 28 her personal journey with addictions and how this has contributed to her work and art a new perspective on addictions and the gifts that can come from them with embodied guidance her identification as a 'two spirit' and gender discussion her experience with ancient wisdom and what she describes as 'primal reclamation' her upcoming exhibition in Australia and a spoken word piece What You'll Hear: Nikki shares her journey to a PhD in Psychology at Stanford, getting sober and the "soul fracturing" experience of academia the 'headiness' of psychology, her initial goal for education and the disconnect between academia and practice her shift from academia to art, a diagnosis of Complex PTSD and how this label led her to Somatic Experiencing and embodied healing high achievers and trauma, compensation and the lack of whole person healing in our current culture how Nikki's therapist's observations led her to deep reflection on her relationships and sexuality Nikki opens up about her addictions and recovery process that included her study of nature, meditation, shamanism and Somatic Experiencing substances as entities and our apprenticeship with them to receive messages/lessons lack of elder guidance and how it leads to compulsion Nikki shares an Alan Watts quote about psychedelic drugs cultural shaming and stigma when it comes to addictions Kimberly shares Somatic Experiencing perspective on addiction, self regulation, self blame and will power the charge of the word CHOOSE when it comes to addictions and the misunderstanding in cognitive behavioral therapy Cohesion and congruence between fight or flight limbic system and the neocortex as it pertains to choice The trauma Nikki experienced within the spiritual community due to a lack of trauma training and the power of her SE training and her art EGO strength definition and how it relates to SE and healing work with clients Kimberly and Nikki discuss Steve Hoskinson's 3 Phases Nikki and Kimberly discuss how sharing her story is 'breaking the rules' as a psychologist, the importance of transparency and embodiment in a care provider and the 'we-ness' of Somatic Experiencing Nikki's identification as a 'two spirit', the definition and spiritual role of a two-spirit in tribal culture and the history of violence towards them the current violence against transgender and non binary individuals, the biological and social function of binary and non binary and the colonial construction of 'man' and 'woman' Kimberly asks Nikki to comment on the implications of widening the gender scope and how it plays out in her own life gender fluidity, sexuality, healing trauma and the full circle of healing Nikki shares her personal experience around her sexuality the grey area, the #METOO movement, the loss of nuanced understanding and polarization regarding race, gender and sexuality, the pressure for surgery, Nikki's support and concern for surgery Nikki talks ancient wisdom, the power of art, soul retrieval, ancestral healing and her journey back to Australia Martin Prechtel and the 'shimmering amnesiacs' What Nikki recommends to get in touch with a non neocortical existence Nikki's move from the city and her introduction with nature in Australia, estrangement from the land and rites of passage Nikki's upcoming art exhibition at The Other Art Fair in Australia Melbourne powerful spoken word! To purchase an original, custom print, merchandise or watch some live painting videos: www.emboldenedexpressions.com References:Nikki's website - https://www.risedown.comGabor Mate - In the Realm of Hungry GhostsSteve Hoskinson - https://organicintelligence.orgAlan Watts - "If you get the message, hang up the phone. For psychedelic drugs are simply instruments, like microscopes, telescopes, and telephones. The biologist does not sit with eye permanently glued to the microscope, he goes away and works on what he has seen."Eduardo Duran - http://soulhealing16.com/Animus Valley Institute - https://animas.org/The Other Art Fair, Melbourne Australia, August 2-5 @ The Facility, http://melbourne.theotherartfair.com/

Ale Duarte is a somatic educator who travels around the world offering training to professionals who work in the fields of psychology, education and body-oriented therapy. What Ale Shares: How he came to work with children combining his experience teaching physical education, Rolfing, and Somatic Experiencing Trauma Therapy. Examples of Ale's work with children and their families. The importance of using simple solutions, play, and seeing the world through the child's eyes. The challenges facing parents in a digital age. How boundaries and protection have changed in a virtual world. Ale's definitions of trauma and self regulation as they relate to children's nervous systems. What You'll Hear: Ale's background teaching physical education and psychomotor skills in Brazil. (2:30) How he moved from teaching to Rolfing and then Somatic Experiencing. (5:20) How he came to combine his many skills to help children in Thailand after the 2008 Tsunami (8:55) How he used games, play and interaction to help children release their trauma. (11:15) Ale's definition of trauma and the spectrum of trauma. (16:30) How even small events, such as a forgotten gift or a broken agreement, can't create significant disruption in the nervous system of a child. (18:00) Children are simple, it is often adults who overcomplicate the situation. (22:50) How the parents style of play affects the child's own ability to play, an important way for children to regulate their systems. (25:30) Ale's definition of self regulation. (30:35) The important difference between exhausting a child's energy and helping them digest their energy. (32:05) His perspective on the increase in diagnoses of ADD, autism, etc., in children today. (32:50) How children's naturally curious nature can be viewed as a problem in schools or in medicine. (35:00) The importance of creating an open dialogue with teachers and doctors, who are not always right. (37:30) Boundaries, protection, and the new challenges facing parents on the digital age. (38:30) The importance of checking on the parents, not just the child. (43:30) His sessions include working with the parents and the children together. (45:30) What adults in general are missing when dealing with children. (47:45) Let children make mistakes. (49:00) Insight, without interference, opens up new channels of creativity and energy for a child. (51:30) The role of touch in Ale's sessions. (54:20) Countries where there is great work happening with children. (1:03:13) Don't think everything is urgent! (1:05:30) The mistake of viewing "doing nothing" as being lazy. (1:07:40) Some kids need close proximity and one-on-one attention to connect the dots. (1:12:50) The importance of having patience when children say, "I don't know" or "I can't". (1:14:45) Learn about Ale's workshop, Tune into Children. (1:19:20) Children are always trying to release their trauma. (1:21:00) Ale Duarte is a somatic educator who travels around the world offering training to professionals who work in the fields of psychology, education and body-oriented therapy. His specialty is experience in child trauma, and the inherent ability of a child's body to recover from trauma impact, through highly tuned somatic consciousness within the therapeutic relation. As part of his professional career, Ale provided logistic support to professionals in areas of natural disasters and conflicts in many countries, such as the tsunami in Asia in 2005, Hurricane Katrina in 2006, the earthquake in China in 2008, the tsunami in Japan in 2011, and the civil conflicts in Sri Lanka and Syria.