Passion & Presence

10 snips

Feb 23, 2026

Maci Daye, a licensed counselor and AASECT-certified sex therapist who blends Hakomi and somatic mindfulness, discusses using presence to break old patterns in relationships. She explores eros as life force, cultivating pressure-free playful sex, and how somatic work reveals hidden resistance. The conversation highlights corrective experiences, mindful embodiment, and practical ways to expand erotic imagination.

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INSIGHT

Eros Is A Bodyfelt Life Force

Eros is a life force energy accessed through the body and senses rather than a single act of sex.
Maci Daye says tuning into pleasure and imagination reconnects us to that energy and allows variable, emergent sexual experiences.

ADVICE

Pause And Reset To Stop Performance Trance

Do observe and befriend your performance habits in vivo to reduce pressure and increase presence before sex.
Maci recommends pausing, taking breaths, reminding each other nothing has to happen, and waiting for fresh impulses.

ADVICE

Practice Catch And Release For Expectations

Try the catch-and-release practice to notice and let go of negative expectations that pre-shape sexual encounters.
Maci guides imagining upcoming sex, noticing bodily disengagements, and returning to an 'I don't know' open state.

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Dr. Tammy talks with experiential and sex therapist Maci Daye about how to use mindfulness and the methods of Hakomi Therapy to break away from past experiences and patterns to help avoid reenacting them in our current relationships and sex lives.

GUEST BIO:

Maci Daye is a force in the world of mindful somatic therapy. She’s a Licensed Professional Counselor, an AASECT-certified Sex Therapist, and a Certified Hakomi Therapist with over 20 years of clinical experience. Her background spans university counseling, social services, and government work, supported by graduate degrees from Harvard University and Georgia State University, plus advanced Somatic Experiencing training developed by Peter Levine.

Maci is also a faculty member at the Hakomi Institute and a Mentor Trainer for Hakomi Mallorca, where she trains therapists in the art of mindful somatic psychotherapy. She’s the author of Passion and Presence: A Couple’s Guide to Awakened Intimacy and Mindful Sex and leads transformative couples’ retreats and professional trainings in Mindful Couples Sex Therapy.

Her mission is simple and powerful: to help individuals and couples live more connected, vibrant lives by claiming their desires and expressing their deepest gifts.

DR. TAMMY WANTS TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS about Sex, Love & Relationship and help you with your Trouble with Sex. Send your questions to drtammy@thetroublewithsex.com.

INTERESTED IN BECOMING A CERTIFIED SEX THERAPIST?
Visit ISTI - Integrative Sex Therapy Institute. If you are already a therapist, find out how to receive your AASECT Sex Therapist Certification. Or, elevate your practice in relational psychotherapy by earning the new Certified Sex and Couples Therapist designation (CSCT). AASECT and CSCT renewal and re-certification classes are also offered.

THE TROUBLE WITH SEX RESOURCES, REFERENCES & INFO

IF YOU'RE CONSIDERING OPENING YOUR RELATIONSHIP, CHECK OUT DR. TAMMY'S BOOK - OPEN MONOGAMY!

To read more about how to improve your sex life, check out Dr. Tammy's Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together.

Learn more about love, marriage, infidelity, monogamy and how to redefine your commitment to each other in Dr. Tammy's TEDX talk - The New Monogamy.

Instagram @thetroublewithsex and doctor_tammynelson