The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk 371: Maria Konnikova - How To Pay Attention, Master Yourself, & Win
Jun 21, 2020
01:00:52
Curiosity Plus Relentless Work
- People who sustain excellence follow genuine curiosity rather than chase money or external rewards.
- They pair intrinsic interest with relentless hard work and long-term focus.
Pick Mentors With Purpose
- Do your homework before approaching a potential mentor and identify exactly why you need that person.
- Pick the person first and ensure their expertise matches what you want to learn.
How A Cold Message Met Her Coach
- Konnikova cold‑messaged Erik Seidel after seeing his name on a conference agenda and secured an in‑person meeting.
- Meeting him in person clinched their coach–student relationship and launched her poker journey.
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Introduction
00:00 • 4min
What I've Found in People Who've Sustained Excellence?
03:33 • 5min
What Inspired You to Become a Poker Player?
08:05 • 5min
The Role of a Coach
13:22 • 3min
Are You Asking Others to Mentor You?
16:44 • 5min
How Did This Relationship Come About?
21:36 • 3min
Is There a Difference Between Nice and Humble?
24:37 • 3min
How Did You Respond to Cold Calls?
27:34 • 4min
The Roll of Luck in Our Lives
31:20 • 5min
What's the Crucial Lesson of Poker?
36:06 • 5min
The Ultimate Goal of Poker Isn't to Make the Most Money.
40:39 • 2min
The Relationship Between Writing and Poker
42:18 • 3min
How Hard Can Writing a Book Be?
45:22 • 3min
Pay Attention Master Yourself
48:38 • 5min
How Do You Stand Up for Yourself?
53:23 • 2min
Is There a General Piece of Advice That You're Going to Pass on to Others?
54:56 • 4min
The Biggest Bluff
58:29 • 2min
The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk
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Full show notes are at www.LearningLeader.com
#371: Maria Konnikova - Maria Konnikova is the author of two New York Times bestsellers, The Confidence Game, winner of the 2016 Robert P. Balles Prize in Critical Thinking, and Mastermind: How to Think Like Sherlock Holmes, an Anthony and Agatha Award finalist. Her new book, The Biggest Bluff, will be out from Penguin Press on June 23, 2020. She is a regularly contributing writer for The New Yorker whose writing has won numerous awards, including the 2019 Excellence in Science Journalism Award from the Society of Personality and Social Psychology. While researching The Biggest Bluff, Maria became an international poker champion and the winner of over $300,000 in tournament earnings—and inadvertently turned into a professional poker player. Maria's writing has been featured in Best American Science and Nature Writing and has been translated into over twenty languages.
Notes:
- Sustaining excellence =
- Genuine interest in what they do for a living
- They follow their curiosity - "It's not about wanting to make a shit load of money."
- Passionate
- "They work their asses off" - They work a lot. It doesn't just happen.
- "Follow your curiosity and obsessions with great rigor." - Brian Koppelman
- Why write a book about poker when you've never played before?
- "I wanted to write about chance and the role luck plays in our life."
- Game theory stemmed from poker
- Poker is about strategic decision making
- Why poker? "Poker is a powerful tool to metabolize the luck that surrounds us, and a way to become comfortable with something that is not only all too applicable to our current situation, but extremely difficult for the human mind to process: uncertainty."
- Erik Seidel became Maria's personal coach/mentor
- "There's no one like him." He's stood the test of time. He's been successful at poker for decades... He's evolved with the changes of the game, made adjustments and has won.
- He's kind and humble.
- Tips on asking for someone to mentor you:
- Do your homework - Read everything there is to know about the person before contacting them
- Be specific with your ask
- Make sure you know why this person should be your mentor
- Figure out what's in it for them
- Find someone who can help amplify your strengths
- Don't write a novel in the first email or DM - Get to the point quickly
- If you can get an in person meeting, do it
- NEVER say: "Can I pick your brain?"
- Why playing poker is comparable to writing: Both are deceptively simple on the surface. Anyone can do either, but to do either well in the long term, a certain mastery is needed. Both are subject to the Dunning-Kruger effect, which means that the more someone knows, the more they realize how much they don't know on a topic, while someone with little knowledge tends to be falsely confident about their understanding of a topic
- Meta-cognitive process - "I great more aware of my thinking."
- You must reflect before reacting. Poker helps you to practice this valuable skill.
- Make decisions after going through a process of reflection
- List the things you need to be attentive to
- What are the relevant factors?
- What should I be paying attention to?
- Write it down
- In order to make better decisions, you must be able to identify your process
- The ultimate goal of poker and life is to make the optimal decision in that moment
- The best poker players work incredibly hard: They study hands, they talk hands over with other bros, they watch video, they dissect hands.
- They build up their self control and their emotional regulation
- What Maria learned from playing a lot of tournament poker?
- "It is an extreme sport. You can't take breaks. You're put in a pressure cooker for hours and must make the right decision."
- "I had internalized gender stereotypes. I was letting myself be bullied. I'd take less active lines because I was scared. I had to overcome that and still need to work on it."
- Advice: "Work hard. Life gives you nothing. Everything is earned. Life isn't fair. You must work for it. Saying life isn't fair isn't good for you. Think: 'What can I do about it? What can I control?'"
- Follow your curiosity
- Read, Read, Read. Read poetry and read fiction