The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett Child Attachment Expert: Hidden Dangers Of Daycare, It Might Be Causing Future Issues For Your Kid! Birth Rates Are Plummeting & Its Terrifying! Dr Erica Komisar
Mar 3, 2025
02:37:21
Erica Komisar is a clinical social worker, psychoanalyst, and parent guidance expert with over 30 years of private practice experience. She is the author of books such as, ‘Chicken Little the Sky Isn't Falling: Raising Resilient Adolescents in the New Age of Anxiety’.
In this conversation, Erica and Steven discuss topics such as, how the mental health crisis is impacting children, how attachment disorders are created in childhood, the dangers of the falling birth rate, and how daycare may cause future issues for your kid.
00:00 Intro
02:21 Erica's Mission
08:12 Who Are Erica's Patients?
09:35 How Have Social Changes Influenced Parenting?
13:00 Is the Role of a Mother More Important Than That of a Father?
16:30 Why Are Fathers Important From a Biological Level?
23:20 Erica's Unpopular Ideas About Parenting
25:17 Family Diaspora: Raising Children Without Extended Family
27:31 Can Raising Children Away From Extended Family Be Justified?
28:30 Voluntary Childlessness
29:25 Attachment Disorders
33:40 How Do Attachment Disorders Manifest in Adulthood?
34:54 Choosing a Partner Based on Attachment Styles
36:20 Predicting Relationship Success Based on Attachment Styles
37:53 Does Having More Children Correlate With Neglect?
39:19 Decline in Birth Rates
41:23 What Is Unique About Relationships With Your Own Children?
43:12 What Contributes to Growing Infertility Among People?
46:45 How Did Erica Manage to Balance Work and Motherhood?
48:48 Should Fathers Be the Stay-at-Home Parent?
51:18 Harlow's Study on Rhesus Monkeys
53:38 The Challenge of Motherhood in Poor Socioeconomic Conditions
57:36 Does More Paid Leave Equal Better Childcare?
59:10 Connection Between Upbringing and Success in Adult Life
01:01:40 ADHD: Why Has It Risen So Much in the Past Decade?
01:07:40 We're Medicating ADHD Wrong
01:09:26 The Top Stressors We're Exposing Our Children To
01:11:29 Is ADHD Hereditary?
01:16:50 What's Wrong With Medicating Children?
01:21:15 The Link Between Stress and ADHD
01:22:23 What to Do if a Kid Screams in a Supermarket
01:25:54 The Different Types of Trauma
01:32:43 Same-Sex Couples Taking Roles
01:38:50 What Should Career-Driven Mothers Do?
01:42:08 Not Everyone Can Do This Stuff
01:45:25 Children Don't Need Other Kids Until the Age of 3
01:47:00 Ads
01:48:59 What's So Important at 3 Years Old?
01:55:32 Can I Repair My Trauma and Brain Past My 30s?
01:58:44 Our Pain and Trauma Are Rooted in Childhood
02:02:33 Is "Daddy Issues" a Thing?
02:06:33 Are We Taking Men's Purpose Away?
02:10:42 Men's Testosterone Drops When They Become Fathers
02:13:03 What Happens When Men Become the Primary Caregiver?
02:16:22 Should We Split Schools Into Genders?
02:19:11 Testosterone Decrease
02:21:12 Raising Healthy Kids in a World of Technology
02:24:45 The Importance of Being Present With Your Child
02:25:48 What Should Employers Do?
02:27:22 Do You Realise How Controversial the Things You Say Are?
02:28:02 The Reason All of This Is So Personal to You
02:30:58 What Does Your Obituary Say?
Follow Erica:
Instagram - https://g2ul0.app.link/pwv9PCz0lRb
Twitter - https://g2ul0.app.link/2EKsgfB0lRb
Website - https://g2ul0.app.link/OPtiA4a8lRb
You can purchase Erica’s books:
‘Chicken Little the Sky Isn't Falling: Raising Resilient Adolescents in the New Age of Anxiety’, here: https://amzn.to/41CKbWd
'Being There: Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters' - https://www.amazon.com/Being-There-Prioritizing-Motherhood-Matters/dp/0143109294
The The Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards here: https://g2ul0.app.link/f31dsUttKKb
Follow me:
https://g2ul0.app.link/gnGqL4IsKKb
Independent research: https://stevenbartlett.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/DOAC-Erica-Komisar-Independent-research-further-reading.pdf
Sponsors:
ZOE - http://joinzoe.com with code BARTLETT10 for 10% off
WHOOP - https://JOIN.WHOOP.COM/CEO
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theexperienceplus.substack.com
In this conversation, Erica and Steven discuss topics such as, how the mental health crisis is impacting children, how attachment disorders are created in childhood, the dangers of the falling birth rate, and how daycare may cause future issues for your kid.
00:00 Intro
02:21 Erica's Mission
08:12 Who Are Erica's Patients?
09:35 How Have Social Changes Influenced Parenting?
13:00 Is the Role of a Mother More Important Than That of a Father?
16:30 Why Are Fathers Important From a Biological Level?
23:20 Erica's Unpopular Ideas About Parenting
25:17 Family Diaspora: Raising Children Without Extended Family
27:31 Can Raising Children Away From Extended Family Be Justified?
28:30 Voluntary Childlessness
29:25 Attachment Disorders
33:40 How Do Attachment Disorders Manifest in Adulthood?
34:54 Choosing a Partner Based on Attachment Styles
36:20 Predicting Relationship Success Based on Attachment Styles
37:53 Does Having More Children Correlate With Neglect?
39:19 Decline in Birth Rates
41:23 What Is Unique About Relationships With Your Own Children?
43:12 What Contributes to Growing Infertility Among People?
46:45 How Did Erica Manage to Balance Work and Motherhood?
48:48 Should Fathers Be the Stay-at-Home Parent?
51:18 Harlow's Study on Rhesus Monkeys
53:38 The Challenge of Motherhood in Poor Socioeconomic Conditions
57:36 Does More Paid Leave Equal Better Childcare?
59:10 Connection Between Upbringing and Success in Adult Life
01:01:40 ADHD: Why Has It Risen So Much in the Past Decade?
01:07:40 We're Medicating ADHD Wrong
01:09:26 The Top Stressors We're Exposing Our Children To
01:11:29 Is ADHD Hereditary?
01:16:50 What's Wrong With Medicating Children?
01:21:15 The Link Between Stress and ADHD
01:22:23 What to Do if a Kid Screams in a Supermarket
01:25:54 The Different Types of Trauma
01:32:43 Same-Sex Couples Taking Roles
01:38:50 What Should Career-Driven Mothers Do?
01:42:08 Not Everyone Can Do This Stuff
01:45:25 Children Don't Need Other Kids Until the Age of 3
01:47:00 Ads
01:48:59 What's So Important at 3 Years Old?
01:55:32 Can I Repair My Trauma and Brain Past My 30s?
01:58:44 Our Pain and Trauma Are Rooted in Childhood
02:02:33 Is "Daddy Issues" a Thing?
02:06:33 Are We Taking Men's Purpose Away?
02:10:42 Men's Testosterone Drops When They Become Fathers
02:13:03 What Happens When Men Become the Primary Caregiver?
02:16:22 Should We Split Schools Into Genders?
02:19:11 Testosterone Decrease
02:21:12 Raising Healthy Kids in a World of Technology
02:24:45 The Importance of Being Present With Your Child
02:25:48 What Should Employers Do?
02:27:22 Do You Realise How Controversial the Things You Say Are?
02:28:02 The Reason All of This Is So Personal to You
02:30:58 What Does Your Obituary Say?
Follow Erica:
Instagram - https://g2ul0.app.link/pwv9PCz0lRb
Twitter - https://g2ul0.app.link/2EKsgfB0lRb
Website - https://g2ul0.app.link/OPtiA4a8lRb
You can purchase Erica’s books:
‘Chicken Little the Sky Isn't Falling: Raising Resilient Adolescents in the New Age of Anxiety’, here: https://amzn.to/41CKbWd
'Being There: Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters' - https://www.amazon.com/Being-There-Prioritizing-Motherhood-Matters/dp/0143109294
The The Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards here: https://g2ul0.app.link/f31dsUttKKb
Follow me:
https://g2ul0.app.link/gnGqL4IsKKb
Independent research: https://stevenbartlett.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/DOAC-Erica-Komisar-Independent-research-further-reading.pdf
Sponsors:
ZOE - http://joinzoe.com with code BARTLETT10 for 10% off
WHOOP - https://JOIN.WHOOP.COM/CEO
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theexperienceplus.substack.com