How To Strengthen And Repair Our Relationships With Others

Mar 20, 2023

Angelika Alana, founder of the Somatic Healing Institute, shares her expertise on body-based healing methods crucial for personal growth and enhancing relationships. She discusses how strong connections can dramatically influence health and longevity, likening loneliness to serious health risks. The importance of curiosity in deepening relationships is explored, emphasizing vulnerability and open communication. Alana also highlights how body awareness fosters healing and intimacy, showcasing the transformative power of embracing complexity in our interpersonal connections.

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INSIGHT

Relationship Success and Failure

Contempt, criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling destroy relationships.
Admiration, a balance of security and freedom, and autonomy with belonging are key for success.

INSIGHT

Setting Boundaries

Create boundaries not just within the relationship, but also with external influences.
Make direct requests instead of protesting and prioritize communication with your partner.

INSIGHT

You Are Not Alone

Normalize relationship struggles by sharing and listening to others' experiences.
Many couples face challenges in private, feeling isolated and unsure where to turn.

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This episode is brought to you by Paleovalley, ButcherBox, and Athletic Greens.

Depending on what form they take, our relationships with others can either make our lives fulfilling and joyful or stressful and even sad. Everyone has the intention to live well and feel happy, but so many of our choices derail us from those goals. Investing our time and energy into our relationships (even the one we have with ourselves) might be the key.

In today’s episode, I talk with Dr. Robert Waldinger, Esther Perel, and Angelika Alana about why relationships are so important to our health and how to be the best version of yourself in them.

Dr. Robert Waldinger is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital, and cofounder of the Lifespan Research Foundation. Dr. Waldinger received his AB from Harvard College and his MD from Harvard Medical School. He is a practicing psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, and he directs a psychotherapy teaching program for Harvard psychiatry residents. Dr. Waldinger is also a Zen master (roshi) and teaches meditation in New England and around the world.

Esther Perel, psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author, is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 30 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into nearly 30 languages.

Angelika Alana is the founder and CEO of the Somatic Healing Institute. She has been featured in Vanity Fair, Well+Good, and Modern Luxury. She certifies coaches and facilitators in her transformational body-based healing method. She has traveled and studied extensively in Indonesia, Brazil, Australia, and the UK, and is a massive foodie with her husband Patrick Drake, cofounder of Hello Fresh.

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Full-length episodes of these interviews can be found here:

Dr. Robert Waldinger

Esther Perel

Angelika Alana