People Pleaser with Austin Archer 3: ANGER with John Lane
Nov 6, 2019
Joining Austin is John Lane, a talented singer-songwriter and actor known as Red Jacket John on Instagram. They dive deep into their shared struggles with anger, exploring its complexities and societal perceptions, especially among men. John reflects on the influence of childhood sports on emotional development and the challenges of expressing feelings under pressure. The conversation also touches on testosterone’s role in emotional responses, anecdotes of road rage, and the importance of harnessing anger for healthier outlets, advocating for understanding and patience in emotional journeys.
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Baseball Blowup That Ended A Season
- John recalls getting kicked out of baseball at 13 after yelling "You sicken me" at a teammate and being pulled from the game.
- That moment marked his decision to quit the sport because his temper made participation untenable.
Chemistry Shapes Anger Patterns
- John and Austin suggest biology plays a big role: testosterone can amplify aggression and reduce tears.
- Recognizing a chemical component relieved some moral shame and reframed anger as partly biological, not purely character.
Different Emotional Languages Get Different Help
- Men and women often show distress differently: men may show anger while women show tears for similar stimuli.
- This difference changes how others respond and can leave angry men feeling less helped despite needing support.