10% Happier with Dan Harris Feel Your Feelings, Drop the Story | Sebene Selassie
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Apr 24, 2026 
Sebene Selassie, a meditation teacher and author focused on embodiment and mindfulness, explores why paying attention to the breath can suddenly feel weird. She gets into shame, rumination, and RAIN. There’s also a fresh look at working with discomfort, plus her four-elements practice for getting out of your head and back into the body.
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Use Other Anchors When Breath Feels Forced
- Skip breath meditation if it reliably makes breathing feel forced; hands, feet, heartbeat, belly, or lying down still count as valid mindfulness anchors.
- Sebene Selassie says many people are shallow mouth breathers, so posture, nasal breathing, and relaxation often matter more than forcing attention onto nostrils.
Relaxation Matters More Than Striving
- Striving can sabotage meditation because tension blocks the ease practitioners think effort will produce.
- Sebene Selassie frames awakening as deepening relaxation, and Dan Harris echoes Joseph Goldstein's line that enlightenment can mean lightening up.
Treat Shame As A Mind State Not An Identity
- Work with shame like any other mind state by returning to the practice you chose instead of spiraling into self-judgment.
- Sebene Selassie distinguishes guilt from shame: guilt says I did something wrong, while shame says I am wrong.