The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett World Expert on Fatherhood & Love: The Truth About Monogamy, Breakups & The Science of Love! Dr. Anna Machin
Jul 3, 2025
02:20:21
World Renowned Fatherhood Expert Dr Anna Machin reveals the #1 lie about monogamy, how cheating hijacks human brains, and the evolutionary truth behind love, trust, and fatherhood!
Dr Anna Machin is an evolutionary anthropologist and relationship scientist known for her groundbreaking research on human connection, love, fatherhood, and attachment. She is also the author of books such as, 'Why We Love: The New Science Behind Our Closest Relationships'.
She explains:
How cheating activates your brain’s reward system like an addiction.
Why modern men are in emotional crisis and how society is breaking them.
The hormonal reason you fall for the wrong person again and again.
How your DNA, oxytocin, and dopamine shape who you love and trust.
00:00 Intro
02:31 Why Love Is the Core of Being Human
07:29 The Forgotten Role of Fathers
09:26 Individualism and the Current State of Love
15:00 Women Find Their Right Partner by Smelling Them
20:37 Testosterone Is Linked to Success in Men
22:07 How to Increase Your Attractiveness (Backed by Science)
26:39 Never Say This on a Date
27:52 Are “Icks” Red Flags We Should Listen To?
30:14 We’ve Got Too Many Dating Options
34:01 Monogamy and Polyamory
40:23 Why People in Polyamorous Relationships Hide It
42:05 Are We All Pretending to Be Monogamous?
43:25 Why the First 1000 Days Are Critical for a Baby
49:10 Rough and Tumble: The Parenting Technique Everyone Should Teach
52:06 How Your Brain and Body Change When Becoming a Dad
54:41 Why Some Dads Don’t Instantly Bond With Their Kids
58:38 Mental Health Issues From Lacking a Father Figure Early On
1:02:16 Implications of an Absent Mother
1:11:24 Biological Fathers vs. Father Figures
1:12:57 Father Figures in Lesbian Couples
1:15:04 Are Parents Needed in the First Two Years?
1:21:27 The Optimal Scenario to Raise a Child
1:26:19 How Dads Can Bond With Their Newborns
1:30:02 Love Drugs
1:38:51 Understanding Attachment Styles
1:43:14 Is Modern Society Pushing Us Toward a Specific Attachment Style?
1:44:36 Doomscrolling on Dating Apps? This Is Your Attachment Style
1:47:43 How to Change Your Attachment Style
1:51:41 How ADHD May Impact Your Love Life
1:57:48 Do People With ADHD Cheat More Often?
2:01:59 How to Contain Your Impulses
2:03:18 Sex Life and Neurodivergence
2:04:04 Relationships as the Biggest Factor in Health and Longevity
2:10:20 What Happens to the Brain When It's in Love
2:14:23 When Did You Feel Like You’d Made It?
Follow Dr Anna:
Instagram - https://bit.ly/45ElU4p
Website - https://bit.ly/3GcTT9S
You can purchase Dr Anna’s book, ‘Why We Love: The New Science Behind Our Closest Relationships’, here: https://bit.ly/3GjfOfo
You can purchase Dr Anna’s book ‘The Life of Dad: The Making of a Modern Father’, here: https://bit.ly/4lbtE2A
Get your hands on the Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards here: https://bit.ly/conversationcards-mp
Get email updates: https://bit.ly/diary-of-a-ceo-yt
Follow Steven: https://g2ul0.app.link/gnGqL4IsKKb
Sponsors:
KetoneIQ - Visit https://ketone.com/STEVEN for 30% off your subscription order
Shopify - https://shopify.com/bartlett
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theexperienceplus.substack.com
Dr Anna Machin is an evolutionary anthropologist and relationship scientist known for her groundbreaking research on human connection, love, fatherhood, and attachment. She is also the author of books such as, 'Why We Love: The New Science Behind Our Closest Relationships'.
She explains:
How cheating activates your brain’s reward system like an addiction.
Why modern men are in emotional crisis and how society is breaking them.
The hormonal reason you fall for the wrong person again and again.
How your DNA, oxytocin, and dopamine shape who you love and trust.
00:00 Intro
02:31 Why Love Is the Core of Being Human
07:29 The Forgotten Role of Fathers
09:26 Individualism and the Current State of Love
15:00 Women Find Their Right Partner by Smelling Them
20:37 Testosterone Is Linked to Success in Men
22:07 How to Increase Your Attractiveness (Backed by Science)
26:39 Never Say This on a Date
27:52 Are “Icks” Red Flags We Should Listen To?
30:14 We’ve Got Too Many Dating Options
34:01 Monogamy and Polyamory
40:23 Why People in Polyamorous Relationships Hide It
42:05 Are We All Pretending to Be Monogamous?
43:25 Why the First 1000 Days Are Critical for a Baby
49:10 Rough and Tumble: The Parenting Technique Everyone Should Teach
52:06 How Your Brain and Body Change When Becoming a Dad
54:41 Why Some Dads Don’t Instantly Bond With Their Kids
58:38 Mental Health Issues From Lacking a Father Figure Early On
1:02:16 Implications of an Absent Mother
1:11:24 Biological Fathers vs. Father Figures
1:12:57 Father Figures in Lesbian Couples
1:15:04 Are Parents Needed in the First Two Years?
1:21:27 The Optimal Scenario to Raise a Child
1:26:19 How Dads Can Bond With Their Newborns
1:30:02 Love Drugs
1:38:51 Understanding Attachment Styles
1:43:14 Is Modern Society Pushing Us Toward a Specific Attachment Style?
1:44:36 Doomscrolling on Dating Apps? This Is Your Attachment Style
1:47:43 How to Change Your Attachment Style
1:51:41 How ADHD May Impact Your Love Life
1:57:48 Do People With ADHD Cheat More Often?
2:01:59 How to Contain Your Impulses
2:03:18 Sex Life and Neurodivergence
2:04:04 Relationships as the Biggest Factor in Health and Longevity
2:10:20 What Happens to the Brain When It's in Love
2:14:23 When Did You Feel Like You’d Made It?
Follow Dr Anna:
Instagram - https://bit.ly/45ElU4p
Website - https://bit.ly/3GcTT9S
You can purchase Dr Anna’s book, ‘Why We Love: The New Science Behind Our Closest Relationships’, here: https://bit.ly/3GjfOfo
You can purchase Dr Anna’s book ‘The Life of Dad: The Making of a Modern Father’, here: https://bit.ly/4lbtE2A
Get your hands on the Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards here: https://bit.ly/conversationcards-mp
Get email updates: https://bit.ly/diary-of-a-ceo-yt
Follow Steven: https://g2ul0.app.link/gnGqL4IsKKb
Sponsors:
KetoneIQ - Visit https://ketone.com/STEVEN for 30% off your subscription order
Shopify - https://shopify.com/bartlett
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit theexperienceplus.substack.com