Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships 151 - Conflict Crash Course
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Dec 26, 2017 Conflict is a natural part of relationships, but it can lead to growth instead of negativity. The hosts share tools for constructive resolution, including regular check-ins to address issues before they escalate. They explore personal conflict tactics, emotional manipulation, and harmful behaviors like contempt. Strategies for managing fights in the moment, writing out competing narratives, and using communication techniques are discussed. Lastly, they highlight the importance of reconnection through positive activities after disagreements.
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Emotions Can Become Winning Habits
- Emotional displays (loud anger or tears) can be habitual tactics that once 'worked' in childhood.
- These reactions may not be manipulative but are neural pathways that win past conflicts.
Don’t Dismiss Emotion As Irrational
- Avoid contempt, tone-policing, and 'I'm more rational' postures that silence emotions.
- Instead acknowledge emotions and ask for clarity rather than invalidating the speaker.
Halt When You’re H.A.L.T.
- Halt a conversation if you're H.A.L.T. (hungry, angry, lonely, tired, or drunk).
- Schedule a later time to continue and plan the talk instead of fighting while depleted.
