Mormon Stories Podcast Devout Mormon Couple Leaves Church - Clare and Jackson Adams | Ep. 1981
Jan 8, 2025
Clare Howell Adams, a former devout Mormon, shares her struggles with anxiety, OCD, and the pressures of purity culture, alongside her husband, Jackson Adams, who discusses his battles with pornography and a difficult missionary experience. They delve into the emotional toll of faith transition, exploring topics like the impact of modesty on body image, the overwhelming shame cultivated by strict teachings, and the long-lasting effects of their missionary journeys. Together, they highlight their healing journey, emphasizing the importance of authenticity and open dialogue in overcoming their past.
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Questioning God's Benevolence
- Witnessing poverty and violence in Honduras, despite strong faith among the people, shook Jackson's belief in a benevolent God.
- He questioned the doctrine of suffering for learning, finding it arrogant to justify others' pain for personal growth.
Addiction Recovery Program Backfires
- Jackson attended the church's Addiction Recovery Program for his "sexual deviance" but found it worsened his issues.
- The program, similar to Alcoholics Anonymous, focused on pornography, reinforcing the very thoughts it aimed to suppress.
Pornography and Marital Strain
- The pornography issue strained their marriage, with Claire feeling inadequate and Jackson experiencing shame.
- Claire's breakdowns after Jackson's confessions created a cycle of insecurity and pain in their relationship.