On Attachment #126: 5 Hard (But Liberating) Truths About Break-Ups
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Jan 10, 2024 A clear take on why break-ups destabilize and why grief matters. A reminder that break-ups are not competitions and closure is something you create for yourself. Practical boundaries are discussed, including why you lose entitlement to their inner life and why mutual emotional processing can stall healing. The conversation normalizes discomfort when exes move on and offers self-directed practices for recovery.
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Breakups Aren't Competitions
- Breakups are not a competition with winners and losers; viewing them that way fuels ego and shame.
- Stephanie Rigg says the winner/loser mindset stems from ego cloaking low self-worth and prevents genuine healing.
Closure Is A Choice You Make
- You may never get answers or closure from your ex; waiting for it hands them control over your healing.
- Rigg reframes closure as a personal decision to accept the not knowing rather than an explanation from them.
Give Up The Right To Monitor Your Ex
- Stop expecting entitlement to your ex's inner life after the breakup and stop monitoring them.
- Rigg advises redirecting focus inward: ask what you need and how to support yourself when information no longer provides safety.