Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships 570 - Play as Resistance: featuring Gary Ware from Breakthrough Play and Normalizing Non-Monogamy
Mar 10, 2026
Gary Ware, founder of Breakthrough Play who uses play to build connection and resilience. He discusses designing play-centered retreats, how play counters burnout and restores learning, why stress blocks play, and practical tiny-habit strategies like micro-rests and the GRAPES self-care framework. Short, intentional play as resistance and community support are key themes.
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Play Breaks Social Barriers And Builds Group Affinity
- Play changes social perception by lowering status cues and triggering peak positive emotions.
- Gary cites a Thailand study where elders and youth who played Nintendo Wii reported stronger affinity to each other and the whole group.
Asynchronous Games Can Increase Real Life Trust
- Asynchronous games can still build affiliation by creating reciprocal helpful actions.
- Gary recalls Farmville mechanics where helping neighbors in-game increased real-world affinity between in-laws across cultures.
Play Personality Explains Why Different Activities Rest Us
- Play looks different per person and produces rest by shifting neurochemistry, not by format.
- Gary cites Dr. Stuart Brown's play personalities and defines play as joyful activity done regardless of outcome, e.g., storytelling, competition, or crafts.
