Self-Led in Bed: An IFS and Sexuality Podcast 3: Body Trust, Eating and Sexuality, with Marcella Cox
“ There can be really restrictive managers around food and exercise trying to control someone's body. But their firefighters might not be about food. Their firefighters actually might be around sex or spending or overworking…And when we can really work with these parts and understand the protective nature of what they're doing and really befriend them is when they can show us what they're protecting…what fascinates me is it's always complex.”
Content Advisory: This episode explores sensitive topics related to body image, eating disorders, trauma and sexuality. Listener discretion is advised.
It’s hard to feel Self-Led in Bed when we do not feel at home in our bodies, when we judge our bodies harshly and feel shameful about them. In this episode of Self-Led in Bed, I speak with Marcella Cox, a Certified IFS therapist who specializes in treating eating disorders, disordered eating, body shame, and trauma.
Something I really appreciated talking with Marcella is the depth of her kindness and compassion for the parts of ourselves that take on the job of keeping us out of our bodies. She invites embodiment throughout the episode, and brings in the role cultural influences like patriarchy and capitalism play in our relationship to body trust and connection.We explore the overlaps between eating and sexuality and consider the profound impact of slowing down and noticing what we really feel and want.
Key Takeaways:
- Cultural messages and societal pressures significantly impact our relationship with our bodies and can lead to body shame, self-criticism, and disrupted embodiment.
- Internal protective parts, such as "managers" and "firefighters," play a crucial role in shaping our relationship with food, exercise, and sexuality.
- Cultivating self-compassion, honoring bodily sensations, and practicing mindfulness can help us reconnect with our bodies and cultivate more fulfilling sexual experiences.
- Embodiment is an ongoing process that requires ongoing attention, self-awareness, and a willingness to explore and challenge internalized beliefs and societal pressures.
About Marcella Cox:
Marcella Cox, LMFT, is a Certified IFS Therapist specializing in treating eating disorders, disordered eating, body shame, and trauma. Marcella recently contributed the chapter on IFS and Disordered Eating in Altogether Us: Integrating the IFS Model with Key Modalities, Communities, and Trends (Pivotal Press, 2023). She is also on the staff of Susan McConnell, developer of Somatic IFS, an approach that blends the IFS model of therapy with embodiment practices. As an Approved IFS Clinical Consultant, Marcella provides professional consultation and supervision. She also leads workshops, trainings and retreats. Her certifications as a Body Trust Provider, Daring Way Facilitator and Mindful Self-Compassion Teacher also inform her professional work.
Marcella is the founder of Kindful Body, a collaboration of experienced eating disorder professionals providing online therapy and nutrition counseling throughout California. She also co-founded the IFS Telehealth Collective with lead IFS trainers, Mariel Pastor, LMFT and Paul Ginter, Ed.D. The IFS Telehealth Collective is a multi-state mental health group practice dedicated to providing authentic, high-quality IFS Therapy online throughout California, New York, Massachusetts, Florida, Oregon and Michigan. To learn more, visit www.kindfulbody.com or www.ifstherapyonline.com.
Connect with Marcella:
https://www.ifstherapyonline.com
https://www.ifstherapyonline.com/kindfulbody
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