How To Give And Receive Feedback with Dr. J.R. Briggs

Mar 3, 2026

Dr. J.R. Briggs, leadership coach, speaker, and author focused on spiritual formation and practical leadership, joins to explore feedback. He tells a trapeze story about blind spots. Short, actionable tips on receiving feedback, calming defensive reactions, asking permission before giving feedback, and building healthy feedback loops are highlighted.

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ANECDOTE

Trapeze Video Taught The Value Of Outside Mirrors

J.R. Briggs learned the power of feedback at trapeze school where an instructor rewound video and gave precise cues that corrected his form.
That remote-and-TV metaphor showed how outside perspective can reveal blind spots and enable him to nail the trick.

INSIGHT

Receiving Feedback Trumps Giving It

Receiving feedback matters more than giving it because humility to accept correction opens learning and builds credibility to later offer feedback.
J.R. cites Proverbs to argue that welcoming correction is central to growing wisdom and emotional intelligence.

ADVICE

Ask Specific Questions And Respond With Thank You

Ask specific, humble questions and prime the pump by owning what you suspect before soliciting feedback, then simply say Thank you when you receive it.
Write feedback down quickly, pick one thing to improve for 30 days, then circle back and ask if others notice progress.

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Today we are tackling something that we all have to deal with, but very few of us actually know how to do well: feedback.

In this episode, I am honored to be joined by leadership coach, speaker, and author Dr. J.R. Briggs. We are diving deep into the art of giving and receiving feedback, figuring out which of the two is actually more important (spoiler alert: it’s receiving!), and uncovering why feedback often feels so personal and scary.

J.R. shares an incredible story about trapeze school that perfectly illustrates why we need outside perspectives, and we talk about the practical things you can start doing today to completely change how you handle criticism and praise. We discuss how creating healthy feedback loops is the ultimate key to emotional intelligence and growth.

I walked away from this conversation with three specific things I am immediately applying to my day-to-day life, and I know you will too.

Take the free PIES assessment to see your inputs, outputs, and where your biggest area for growth is: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com/pies-assessment

In this episode, we cover:

Why receiving feedback is a more vital skill than giving it

The trapeze analogy: why we desperately need outside perspectives

Practical steps for receiving tough feedback without getting defensive (and the only two words you really need to say)

Why you must ask for permission before giving someone else feedback

How to calm your "reptilian brain" when you feel angry or triggered

The danger of overdrawing your "trust bank account" in relationships

Two powerful, vulnerable questions you can ask your trusted circle right now to uncover your blind spots

This is The Way You Show Up — a podcast and YouTube series all about the science of attraction and influence, and how focusing on these four pillars changes the way you show up at work, at home, in your marriage, in your parenting, and beyond.

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📖 J.R.'s Latest Book: https://bit.ly/4l2cJjI

Dr. J.R. Briggs lives with a clear and focused calling: to grow fruit on other people’s trees.

His work seeks to bridge the gap between spiritual formation and actionable leadership practices, aiming to help faith leaders and their organizations grow both in their faith and their impact on their communities.

I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.

The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."

We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.

If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.

New episodes every Tuesday.

Don't just exist. Show up.

🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com

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