Solo – The Single Person’s Guide to a Remarkable Life The Psychology of Solitude
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Mar 10, 2026 Thuy-vy Nguyen, experimental psychologist who studies the deactivation effect in solitude, and Robert Coplan, longtime researcher of solitude and shyness, explore what happens when you sit with yourself. They discuss how brief alone time lowers emotional arousal. They debate choice versus forced solitude, phones versus mindful alone time, how kids and culture shape solitude, and practical ways to build quiet-time skills.
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Choice And Mindset Determine Solitude's Value
- Choice about solitude matters: voluntarily chosen solitude tends to be restorative, while avoidance-driven solitude often leads to rumination.
- Robert Coplan explains mindset and motivation shape whether alone time fills you up or leaves you empty.
Evolution Explains Diverse Solitude Preferences
- Solitude likely coexists with human social needs; different people evolved different tolerances so both solitude and sociability persist.
- Robert Coplan: balance between social time and alone time is person-specific, not one-size-fits-all.
The Shock Study Is About Being Forced To Do Nothing
- The famous 'people shock themselves rather than sit alone' study is about doing nothing and lack of choice, not solitude per se.
- Thuy-vy Nguyen and Robert note mindset and instructions (e.g., think positive) change participants' 15-minute experience.
