Reimagining Love with Dr. Alexandra Solomon Featuring The Sober Mom Life: Taking Sexy Back Soberly (and so much more!)
Mar 20, 2026
Dr. Alexandra Solomon, clinical psychologist and author focused on relationships and intimacy. She explains how one partner getting sober reshapes a relationship. She urges slowing down, using relational self-awareness, and practical steps to rebuild sober sexual connection. She also suggests love practices like nightly appreciations and when to try couple therapy.
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New Sobriety Can Trigger Partner Shame
- New sobriety enthusiasm can feel evangelical and threaten partners by implying moral superiority.
- Solomon notes men often anchor self-worth in their wife's eyes, so perceived judgment can provoke retreat or undermining behavior.
Ask For What You Need With Vulnerable Language
- Use vulnerable, specific requests instead of badgering about drinking.
- Say things like "I'm noticing when you drink I feel X" or "I could use you to tell me you're proud of my sobriety."
Spouses Don't Need To Be Sole Best Friends
- Romantic partners don't have to be sole best friends; friendship roles are multiplex and generationally shifting.
- Solomon contrasts older single 'one best friend' norms with Gen Z's multiple "best friends" model.
