The Evergetinos: Book Two - Chapter XLVII, Part I

We speak because we are afraid to be still.

We speak because silence exposes us.

We speak because when the mouth closes the heart begins to make noise and that noise is often unbearable.

The Fathers knew this long before psychology gave it names. They knew that speech is not neutral. It is not just communication. It is an outflow of what is ruling the inner world. Every word carries the weight of the heart behind it. This is why Abba Pambo could stand at death and say that he had not repented of a single word and yet also say that he had not even begun to serve God. He knew what speech costs. He knew how easily a careless phrase can wound another, harden the self or invite the demons into the space between people. He did not trust his own clarity. He waited. He let months pass rather than speak a word that was not born from God.

That kind of restraint feels almost inhuman to us. We live in a world that rewards immediacy. We are trained to answer quickly, react quickly, express quickly, post quickly, correct quickly. But speed is not truth. Speed is often panic wearing a clever face. The monk who waits to speak is not slow. He is standing before God inside himself. He is listening for something that is not his own.

The Elder says that a man can be silent with his lips and loud with his heart. That is the most damning line in this whole section. You can say nothing and still be screaming. You can be quiet and still be condemning everyone around you. You can appear peaceful while your mind is devouring your brothers. Another man can speak all day and yet remain silent because he refuses to let his words become weapons, judgments or self display. Silence is not a style. It is a spiritual state.

Idle talk is not mostly obscene or stupid. It is unnecessary. It is speech that does not serve salvation. It is talk that fills the space so we do not have to face what is happening inside. We speak about bodies and opinions and events and annoyances and plans because these are safer than the truth of our hearts. The moment we speak about what is good we discover how quickly evil slips in. Pride sneaks into holy words. Comparison sneaks into spiritual conversation. The self sneaks into everything.

This is why the Elder answers the brother who wants a word to be saved with something that sounds almost trivial. Do not hasten to speak before you consider what you are going to say. That is not etiquette. That is warfare. To pause before speaking is to interrupt the automatic rule of the ego. It is to refuse to let the tongue be driven by irritation, hunger for recognition or the need to be right. It is to create a small space where God might enter.

Most of what we say is not meant to help anyone. It is meant to regulate ourselves. We speak to soothe anxiety. We speak to discharge frustration. We speak to draw attention. We speak to feel real. We speak to avoid the ache of not being in control. The mouth becomes a narcotic. The more we use it the less we notice how enslaved we are to it.

This is why the Fathers are so severe. They are not moralizing. They are diagnosing a sickness. The soul that cannot keep watch over its words cannot keep watch over its thoughts. The heart that pours itself out through constant speech cannot remain gathered before God. It leaks. It disperses. It becomes weak.

The tragedy is that we confuse expression with honesty. We think that saying what we feel is the same as bringing it to God. It is not. Most of the time it just feeds the feeling. It strengthens the pattern. It builds a little kingdom around the self. We call it authenticity but it is often captivity.

The monk learns slowly and painfully that every word either bends him toward God or bends him toward himself. There is no neutral speech. Either it deepens prayer or it corrodes it. Either it builds communion or it sows division. Either it creates space for grace or it fills the room with ego.

This is why the saint waits. This is why the Elder warns. This is why the Fathers tremble before idle talk. They have seen what words do to the heart. They have watched souls unravel because the mouth was never taught to kneel.

To learn silence is not to become mute. It is to become true. It is to let God have the first and last word inside you. And until that happens every sentence we speak is a small gamble with our soul.

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Text of chat during the group:

00:00:31 Fr. Charbel Abernethy: Page 353

00:01:32 Fr. Charbel Abernethy: Hypothesis XLVII page 353 concerning speech and silence

00:06:10 Catherine Opie: Without mosquitoes we would have no frogs or bats

00:11:38 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 353 A Hypothesis 47

00:12:10 Catherine Opie: Reacted to "P. 353 A Hypothesis ..." with 👍🏻

00:13:55 Angela Bellamy: twice this winter we had -40

00:14:02 Catherine Opie: Is that Farenheit

00:14:08 Angela Bellamy: without windchill.

00:14:21 Angela Bellamy: yes. so chilly!

00:14:22 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 353 A Hypothesis 47

00:17:03 Myles Davidson: Replying to "Is that Farenheit"

yes

00:18:35 Una’s iPhone: And some of us get out of joint if we don’t get an immediate reply to a text

00:21:17 Anna: Is anyone else having the volume drop off and return?

00:21:32 Angela Bellamy: not me

00:21:35 Andrew Adams: Replying to "Is anyone else havin..."

It’s fine for me

00:22:32 Bob Čihák, AZ: Replying to "Is anyone else havin..."

A little, until I turned off my VPN.

00:24:40 Bob Čihák, AZ: P. 353 B

00:24:57 Jonathan Grobler: Loose lips sink ships, true for the faith also.

00:25:45 Bob Čihák, AZ: This paradox is striking - and TRUE!

00:30:40 Anna: How does one handle conversations where there's something that comes up that conflicts with your Catholic principles to keep without sinful compromising through silence or through words?

00:33:09 Angela Bellamy: I struggle with the subject of idle talk because I seem to receive conflicting guidance. On one hand, I am warned against silence as a kind of self-erasure or avoidance. On the other hand, when I do speak, the condition of my heart is often revealed more clearly, which helps me recognize where repentance is actually needed. From a Christian perspective, I’m unsure how to understand the idea of “self-erasure.” Silence itself does not seem inherently unhealthy to me. Yet I also wonder: how can one maintain silence truthfully when there is still inner sickness at work? Is silence meant to conceal disorder until healing comes, or to accompany repentance as it unfolds?

00:37:23 Anna: With Eastern journaling what's the best way to journal as an Eastern Catholic?

00:39:21 John ‘Jack’: I very often want to “chat” or confide in someone about a situation I find myself going though, but I’ve learned I can’t, as the other party CANNOT  necessarily see things from my personal point of view.   

Many years ago Fr John Eudes Bambager at the Abbey of the Genesee told me “Ultimately it’s just you and God”. That one simple statement brings me more peace than nearly any other council I’ve ever received, it gives me peace.

00:39:42 Anna: Reacted to P. 353 A Hypothesis ... with "👍🏻"

00:39:54 Anna: Reacted to P. 353 A Hypothesis ... with "🎉"

00:46:59 Angela Bellamy: Please forgive me Father, but I will venture to ask you: How should we speak with people who are sick, destitute, or deeply burdened when there is nothing objectively “good” to discuss? In such situations, how do we avoid idle talk on one hand and spiritualized distance on the other, while still remaining truthful and loving in conversation?

00:50:25 Bob Čihák, AZ: Even though St. Ephrem warns us about “idle chatter” throughout Lent, we don’t hear about “idle chatter” the rest of the year. I sometimes facetiously ask others, “So, is idle chatter acceptable the rest of the year?” At least, this question usually brings a few seconds of audible, if not spiritual, silence.

00:51:22 Anthony: St Augustine was a rhetorician. Not everyone is trained that way

00:56:14 Una’s iPhone: Please can you list again the qualities you associate with Eastern writing. I’m a writer

00:56:25 Una’s iPhone: Reacted to "St Augustine was a r…" with 👍

00:56:40 John ‘Jack’: Fr Bamberger past on 1/2020

00:56:48 Una’s iPhone: Reacted to "Please forgive me Fa…" with ❤️

00:58:22 John ‘Jack’: Replying to "Fr Bamberger past on…"
At the age of 94 having been a Monk for nearly 70 years if I recall correctly

01:03:44 Una’s iPhone: Reacted to "I very often want to…" with ❤️

01:04:34 Catherine Opie: Reacted to "At the age of 94 hav..." with ❤️

01:04:47 Una’s iPhone: I love what we’re covering tonight. Very helpful in everyday life

01:10:02 Una’s iPhone: Can you please repeat the  list of qualities you associate with writing in an Easterly way. I’m a writer

01:13:21 Bob Čihák, AZ: Re: St. Augustine, Professor Pecknold, of Catholic U in DC, gave 2 illuminating talks about him and his "City of God" using Pagan authorities in refuting the Pagan's own fallacies, for the Institute of Catholic Culture recently. I listened to the "after action" podcasts. cf. https://instituteofcatholicculture.org/events/the-city-of-god

01:15:58 Una’s iPhone: Thank you

01:16:04 Jennifer Dantchev: Thank you! 😊

01:16:21 Una’s iPhone: From the chattering solitaries

01:16:51 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you☺️

01:16:55 Catherine Opie: God bless Fr. Many thanks for your time today

01:17:04 Bob Čihák, AZ: Bless you, Father.