
Java with Juli - Making Sense of God and Sex What's Okay in the Bedroom? (You Have More Freedom Than You Think), #596
22 snips
Feb 16, 2026 Hannah Nitz, an Authentic Intimacy contributor who prompts practical conversations, and Joe Caruso, a pastor with ~20 years of pastoral experience, join the discussion. They tackle how to navigate gray areas in marital sex. Short, clear questions guide conversations about pornography, fantasy, BDSM, anal sex, and sex toys. The focus is on boundaries, fidelity, and discerning what builds up a marriage.
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Three Questions To Discern Sexual Choices
- Ask three questions before trying something: Has God said no, is it only us, and is it good for us.
- Use scripture, couple discernment, and prayer to decide together rather than seek a simple yes/no list.
Scripture Shapes The 'No' Boundary
- Scripture contains clear sexual prohibitions like adultery and sex outside marriage and principles against objectifying others.
- Use biblical principles (e.g., protecting purity, not defiling/compromising) when no explicit verse exists.
Guard The 'Only Us' Boundary
- Ask whether the activity introduces a third party or objectifies someone because marriage calls for exclusive fidelity.
- Avoid things that visually or mentally invite others into your sexual relationship, even by mutual consent.





