Biology of staying: loss aversion and reinforcement

How do you know when it’s time to stop trying in a relationship? I get asked this question a lot. How do you know if you’re giving up too soon? How do you know if a relationship still deserves more effort? How do you know if you’ll regret leaving?

These questions show up after you’ve already tried. After the conversations, the compromises, the therapy, the books, and the waiting. What makes this decision especially hard is that, by the time you’re asking it, you’re often not just confused. You’re likely self-gaslighting. While this isn’t a clinical diagnosis, it’s a pattern I see all the time. It’s when you talk yourself out of your own experience in order to avoid discomfort, loss, or a hard truth.

Today, you’ll learn why this decision feels so hard even when you’ve been unhappy for a long time, what psychological and biological forces keep you stuck, and how to assess what you actually need in a relationship so you can decide what to do next without panic, self-blame, or regret.

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Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-know-when-to-stop-trying-in-a-relationship

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