Why Are You Going to Date This Person?

The most important aspect of this is non-judgmental listening. And you're going to hold space to let the other person explore how they arrived at their current position. If someone comes along and gives you an opportunity to self-reflect in a way where you will go through your reasoning process, you'll often start to feel moments of dissonance and question yourself. So reasons for will become reasons against when the motivation to search for reasons that will rationalize and justify your position change.