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"The common denominator in all my failed relationships is me… so I must be the problem.”
It sounds logical. It’s also massively biased.
In this episod, I break down why that conclusion doesn’t hold up, the two other common denominators you’re ignoring (hint: people and a broken world), and the missing data point that changes everything: you don’t actually know your “relationship success rate” compared to anyone else—because you only see your failures, not theirs.I talk about:
- why hurt is inevitable in real relationships
- why repair is the real definition of “safe”
- how confirmation bias and minimization distort your self-image
- why a relationship ending ≠ a relationship “failing”
- the “home runs vs at-bats” analogy that makes this click fast
If you’ve been using relationships as evidence that you’re unlovable or broken—this is a necessary reset.
If my podcast has helped, my new book, The Light Between the Leaves, goes even deeper
Next Steps:📩 Get Practical tools for navigating life with depression and anxiety, delivered weekly.
About me:
I know what it is to feel hopelessly stuck and worthless to the world in general. I also know what it is to live without those feelings. I’m both a Clinical Psychology specializing in treatment-resistant depression and anxiety, and a human who has spent more than a decade managing sever depression and anxiety.
Resources
🪣 Get my free 5-day guide to reclaiming your time and energy despite mental health struggles.
😴 Dramatically improve your sleep in 2 steps with my new Sleep Workbook.
📖 My 1st book: For When Everything is Burning
Disclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client.
But I do care.
